Her King Of Shadows

Chapter XVII.

He let out a scream from his chest and the entire land shook. Everybody trembled. He couldn’t feel her after that. All he had now was emptiness. After tracking her for weeks and guessing what was happening, now she was gone. Alone. In the worst possible place she could be. A place where he couldn’t go. A part of him didn’t care about the rules. He had no fear of Rishon in his heart. Rishon was nothing to him. But he knew she would be long dead before he even arrived. He could kill her just by being close to her.

Now he had to choose his best spy to send to the east and try to figure out what had happened. How did they end up in that place? There was so little that he could do. Not even going to Boris was an option. He had to pretend that everything was well. He had to pretend that he hadn’t lost her. Even now, almost two months later, he was haunted by his last image of her. She was lying in the sand. Not even moving. Her long hair was spread across the sand. Her hand was clutching the black stone around her neck. He wished he could watch over her forever. But he forced the darkness to leave her. He made space for the light. And now he still didn’t know if she was still alive. He still didn’t know what her fate was. And not knowing is not something that happens to a leader like him. With determined steps he went down to the library of his castle. It was the middle of the night. The best time to have secret meetings and even more secret conversations. Victoria was sitting close to the fire. As the coldness from Araphel was the only thing he shared with people around him.

-What were you able to find out?-He didn’t want to waste any time. But by the look on her face, he knew the news would not be good. She had been crying before. That much he could see in her red and tired eyes. She didn’t dare to look at him but continued to look at the fire in the fireplace.

–The house they had stayed in that night was burned. There was a fire to hide the dead bodies. Four adults, one child. Their remains were discovered the next morning.=she said as if not believing them herself. Araphel was standing in front of the closed door. And at that moment he didn’t dare to take a step. He didn’t trust himself. How would you react if someone told you that everything you had in this world had been suddenly destroyed? What would you feel if all the sunlight and happiness was stolen from you in a moment and you know that you will never feel it again? Would you cry? Would you scream? Would you wish that you were dead yourself? He knew that Victoria would never tell him such things if she didn’t believe it was actually her. Nobody would be so cruel.

-I saw her that night. She crossed to the desert.-he reminded her. Victoria was struggling to stay calm. She was talking to her leader. There shouldn’t be any weakness in her voice.

-I went there myself. I wanted to see it with my own eyes. Rishon never knew that I was a part of your family. I met one of his generals and he greeted me. Informed me that no child was found that night. They had recorded an incident in the house earlier. A child did try to escape but was brought back by one of its escorts. Nobody knew who it was. Nobody had seen her face. But they have found the body of a girl…-her voice broke. She looked at her own hands shaking. Why is this so hard? She should be cruel and without a heart already. She had lived for centuries and been through battles. Why did the death of one innocent been so difficult to accept when she had seen death in thousands?

-Some things were saved from the fire. Some clothes, personal belongings, jewelry. I have sent the things back to Boris. He has confirmed that they were all taken by Shana when she left. They are hers. It was her.-she concluded. Araphel didn’t react. He just stood there trying to understand what she was saying. If Shana was dead, for sure he would have felt it. Yes. The connection between them was broken. But he must have felt it if she was no longer a part of his world. He was a leader. He had the power to control thousands. He turned his back to her. Not being able to stand her despair. His heart was telling him to start a war. Just level that entire place to the ground. Finish what he had started with Rishon such a long time ago and take his revenge once and for all. But for whom? If there is still the smallest of chances that she was indeed alive. If there was such little hope, then he didn’t have the right to destroy it. His every move is now being watched and analyzed. If he shows interest in an incident that happened on Rishon's territory, he will betray himself. Victoria was waiting for his decision. They were all waiting for what he was going to do. Araphel made himself stop feeling. He was good at that. The best. There was a bitter smile on his face. Disappointment.

-Let him have her then. Let him keep her. I don’t want her anymore.-with those words he had left.

He had climbed to the highest tower of his castle. Letting the cold wind hit his face as he looked towards the sky. The darkness wasn’t dark enough for him anymore. He could still see her face. Just as she was in her father's home. Standing below a sad apple tree. Her long dark hair was hidden by a white scarf. Her strong scent was brought to him by the wind. And those eyes. Those black storms where he could see himself and how small he was in them. The last thing she told him before he left her. She told him his name. She said it with so much sorrow. And all her words came back to him. She knew. She knew even then that she would never arrive to his home. She will not become a part of his family. It wasn’t meant to be.

But why was he feeling this longing in his heart? Why the memory of her refused to leave him alone? His green eyes searched the darkness before him. Going to all the places which were available to him. All the places that were in darkness. All the way to the vast desert of the Rishon's empire. Searching for her. Trying to see if he can get a glimpse of hope. Just a second of something that could tell him she was alive. He wasn’t able to sense her. But she was still a child of shadows. Darkness will recognize her. He took his time. Patiently and silently looking for the familiar shape. Familiar scent. There was still power in him. He saw the distant fires of the camp. The shapes of guards and weapons glistened in the weak light. Staying in his darkness, he was able to see what he was looking for. But it broke his heart even more. She was lying on the ground. On a dirty floor. Covered by a torn black dress. Her long hair fell on her face. Her body looked weak and smaller than he remembered. He sent his darkness to her. Trying to come closer. Trying to get a better look at her. Wondering if she was still alive. He noticed the bruises on her wrists. Traces of dried blood on her fingernails. As if she was in a fight.

She was sleeping. Pale face was hidden by a small scarf with a hole in it. Is this how she was treated? He felt rage consuming him. A desire woke up in him to destroy that place. Kill everyone. Let his darkness rule the desert to never see the light. How can he leave her there? What kind of a leader would do that to the person he swore to protect? With the last ounces of strength, his darkness backed away. Morning was coming. He found himself still standing in the tower. Cold wind was now mixed with rain. And he knew that maybe she was not his anymore. Rishon had won. He will kill her. He will never again see those black eyes. She was lost to him. He turned his back to the dawn and went inside, leaving all thought of her to the wind.