Her King Of Shadows

Chapter VIII.

Now he found himself going back to Boris' home. As if going back in the past. Guards opened the gate without a word. Boris stood in the lobby. He could see fear in his eyes. He wasn’t sure about the reason behind his arrival. He stood there looking at him. They didn’t have time to be enemies. They didn’t have time for revenge. The fate of his daughter was more important than hate of the past. -I have to talk to her one last time.-he demanded. Boris didn’t move. What could be hiding in those emerald eyes? What were his intentions?

-Maybe it is better we talk about the plans which you carry in your heart.-he showed them towards the armchairs. Even though he didn’t want to waste his precious time, he agreed. She was his daughter. But he kept standing in front of the fireplace. Despite the fire burning, the room was cold. -I am not a cruel father. Shana is everything in my life.-he spoke. It was unusual to hear her name. That name haunted his dreams.

-We can both feel her darkness. Soon will everyone else.-he had to warn him. Boris still looked at him. His grey eyes became darker. -What do you want to do?-he was almost afraid to ask. But the answer wasn’t there yet.

-She does not want to go with me.-he said quietly. That made Boris feel better.

-She is very close to Davon. After she lost her mother, we are her everything. The child in her doesn’t want to lose us.-he explained. He had enough of this conversation. He had enough of pretending.

-We are talking about her life. How long do you think she can survive in this place? Next time maybe I will not be here to save her.-he reminded him.

Boris had to agree to that. He was thinking the same way himself.

-What are you suggesting?-he wanted to know. Silence grew with each moment. He wasn’t sure about the thing they were about to do himself. Him. A warrior. A leader. He never wanted to take responsibility for another life, making it connected to his. But even if he succeeded in taking her to his home, he had no right to keep her there. She would still be without the protection of his name. She would still be a warrior without a father or a brother on her side. He could not simply bring her to his home without a position. Without his name to defend her honor. They both knew it. Those were the rules. He took a deep breath. This was a decision he refused to make for centuries. But after a single conversation with her, he found it so easy to do. She had his heart. She carried it inside herself without really knowing how much power she could have over him. Can he leave that child without his supervision and under the control of someone else? Especially under the control of her father and brother? He waived his head.

-I am returning home soon. I want you to send her to me.-he said it without any feeling. Boris knew what those words meant. Before, he would have been happy that a leader like him was choosing his daughter. Before he would demand power and influence, but all he could feel now was sorrow. He was abandoning his own daughter because he failed to protect her. Because if Shana stays in his home. He knew she would not survive.

-She is all I have.-he whispered. Araphel could feel the pain in those words. He could smell the despair.

-There is no other way than this.-

Boris nodded his head. He slowly turned his back to him, not wanting to look at him longer.

-I knew it would be like this when I invited you. But part of me wanted to have hope. Part of me imagined that you would come here and find people responsible for his night mare, which has been happening for years in this home. First her mother. Now they are trying to kill her. Maybe it is only fate. Maybe it is a punishment for not listening to you. For not sending her away.-he stopped as if trying to choose the best words. -She was never really happy. Never completely happy in this place. I would always find her imagining something more. And I realized how disappointed she felt. She was born to be in the palaces of kings, not in a swamp surrounded by forest. You tried to explain that to me but I didn’t listen. When Shana leaves this home, then nothing will remain to remind me of that part of my life. Everything that was hers will be gone also.-he admitted. Araphel didn’t want to listen to that. The fate of that warrior wasn’t in his hands.

-I want to see her.-he repeated. Boris touched his head, controlling the feeling which threatened to break the surface.

-Davon took her to the garden. Follow the stone steps left from the library. You will see her from the terrace.-he said, leaving him.

There were no flowers left in the garden. Winter was close by. The cold killed everything in its path. Even the apple tree she was standing under lost its leaves a long time ago. All that could be seen were the naked branches. She looked at the greyness of the skies feeling sure she would not be able to see the stars tonight. She fixed the wool scarf on her shoulders, not caring for the dark hair which got lost under the soft fabric. Her brother left her for a couple of minutes. She was safe here. They will not find her here. She didn’t look around. Because she didn’t want to know if they came too close. She didn’t want to guess if the person coming closer was one of her father's guards or a killer. But she recognized the warrior in the black uniform. She knew the way he walked, like owning the land and looking straight. As if nothing could stop him. And she had a feeling she should be scared of him. Her heart told her that nothing good could come from a warrior such as him.

From their last meeting in the library, as if death surrounded him. She knew very little of him. For the most part, there were memories of fear and darkness. But her fear was her companion for so long that she didn’t pay any attention to what he could tell her. Now he was much closer to her than her father's guards would ever dare. He was close enough, so he was able to touch her if he moved his hand. His emerald eyes looked at her as if they knew her. But he could not have. Nobody could know her. Nobody had the right to know her. She slowly fixed her scarf again, trying to remind herself of the warmth because of the coldness in his eyes. Waiting for what he would say to her. Patiently waiting to see what kind of thoughts he would share with her.

-Father told me you knew my mother.-she decided to break the silence. It was her home he was standing in. It was on her to decide what they would talk about. He nodded his head. Araphel let the child lead this battle. The last one he lost with his demands. This one he had to win using her memories.

-Long time ago I believed I knew her.-he confirmed her words. She waited to see if he would say something more but it didn’t happen. It was on her to ask questions. It was on her to decide how much she wanted to know. And if she was able to hear the truth.

-Were you there when she died? I have felt you in the darkness.-this time it wasn’t a question. She said it like a fact she could read somewhere. There were no feelings in those dark eyes and he found himself defeated when he looked at them. Shana turned to the apple tree above her. Sometime ago it was full of pink flowers. Sometime ago she would hide in the green branches. Just a couple of months before, she was a child standing in a garden filled with flowers. And now her heart told her it would never happen again. Not after everything that had happened in the swamp. Not after the arrival of this warrior, which brought death with him.

-I have talked to your father.-he started. But her pale smile stopped him. All words were gone suddenly. He watched her raising her head towards the skies while snowflakes slowly died in her dark hair. It was a scene to live for. And at that moment he realized that this girl was the real opposite of everything he was. They would never be equal.

-Tomorrow is my birthday.-she whispered. But he could hear her no matter how quietly she was to speak. -Father will arrange for a celebration like every year.-she looked at him. They both knew what she didn’t want to say. It was supposed to be her chance to say goodbye. If something last was permitted to her, that would happen tomorrow. He nodded his head. Aware of how little they spoke to each other. Nothing else was needed. -Will you come?-the child in her wanted to know. He wanted to ask her what she wanted. Did she want to see him in her home? Her dark eyes answered him with a smile. I have just invited you warrior. How come you are not aware of it? He kept looking at her. He didn’t know why, but it was hard for him to speak in that moment. Everything he could and wanted was to keep looking at her. Dark eyes touched him with each second that passed. She bowed her head and showed him to follow her on the narrow stone path. He walked next to her, letting her lead to her dreams. He enjoyed the breeze which brought the smell of jasmine. Smell of youth and hope.

-I am not sure if it is the truth but I have seen what it waiting for us, warrior. Part of a night mare which can not be avoided.-her voice was tired. He kept walking, still confused by her voice. How could she know it all? Her fate was not decided yet. Dark eyes looked at him very seriously. She stopped trying to make a point. But actually she didn’t want anyone to hear them. -I will not be in your home.-she was so sure of it. And she said the exact thing he didn’t want to hear.

He was looking at her. She seemed so serious and vulnerable it hurt.

-If I were you I wouldn’t be so sure-he said confidently. They stood looking at each other. This was their time to be honest. She didn’t have to hide in front of him. They were both aware of what was ruling their lives. She waived her head. There was sorrow in it. As if the future was not possible to change no matter how much they hoped.

-In my dreams I see myself in some other place. In a land far away from you. With some other warrior.-she whispered. He raised his hand as if to touch her but Shana stepped away, one small but important step. It wasn’t for him to touch her. It wasn’t on him to take such liberties. Not yet. He made himself stay calm despite her words. He tried not to show hate and anger which woke up after all these centuries.

-Those are only dreams which you shouldn’t take seriously.-he was proud. She agreed with him because she owed him as much. He had saved her life before. Her face was pale from the cold. Her lips almost turned blue. He felt time ran out. But dark eyes didn’t let him go yet. He was trapped in place by the strength of her eyes. How was that possible?

-You can tell me everything about your home tomorrow during the celebration.-she changed the subject. She fixed her scarf one last time. Took a last look at him and stepped away completely. He just felt the smell of jasmine go away while he looked at her going into the darkness.