Don't Stop Believing

Brian

Brian

I woke up feeling down and depressed. In fact, I felt like s**t. I hadn’t felt like this in years, not since Sadie’s accident and then again after she had rejected me the first time around. I guess that was understandable, back then. She was overwhelmed and frustrated and I had only been making things worse.

I hadn’t even tried to push for anything this time, though. I’d just wanted to be with her. And she had even been the one to suggest brunch.

Maybe I hadn’t been completely honest with myself. I had gone to see her to see if there was anything left of the girl that had once been my whole world. A part of me had probably been pretty pushy even if I hadn’t realized it. Some urgent need probably showed on my face that had manipulated her into saying yes.

She might not have remembered anything from before, or at least, she might not have remembered me. But there was so much about her that reminded me of the girl she used to be. And there was so much about her that was new and different. She had grown up. She had become more herself. The girl was gone, and a woman was in her place.

And still, something about her had seemed so lost. I guess that was understandable, too. She had been through alot, and my memories were my most prized possessions. I couldn’t imagine what it had to be like, to lose them.

It didn’t change how I felt. I didn’t like being this down, and I usually tried to do something about it. Being depressed just pissed me off. To get out of a funk in the past, I would donate to a charity, push to be better at my sport or perhaps took a hike in the woods.

I would do something to enrich my life with things that weren’t about money. And most of the time, it helped.

Today, I was planning on running it out of my system. I had training in about an hour, and I was going to push as hard as I could for as long as I could. I was going to work myself to death if that was what it took.

I stepped into the shower and closed my eyes, letting the hot water run over my body and my face. I made the water as hot as I could bear, and I stood there for longer than I needed.

Before long, I couldn’t escape the thoughts of Sadie that came crashing into my mind. My c**k was hard and I decided that taking it into my hand and playing with it would be as good a cure as any.

Try as I might not to, all I could think about while I stroked my hard c**k was Sadie. Her seductive grey eyes. Her beautiful smile. That round ass and small waist.

God, she was so f*****g hot. I remembered how I had taken her virginity, pushing my c**k in and out of her p***y. I usually tried not to fantasize about that because it made me feel guilty— feeling pleasure out of remembering the night on which she had fallen. Especially when she herself couldn’t even remember it.

But now, I leaned onto the glass shower wall and pumped my c**k harder, letting the images flood into my mind. Of her perfect t**s I used to get to suck on. The way she would take my own c**k into her hand and play with it like I’m playing with it now, but it was better when she was the one making it feel good.

I thought about how I wanted to do things to her I hadn’t gotten to do. Tie her up. f**k her doggy style. Pick her up and carry her while her legs are spread around me until I’m pushing my c**k into her and f*****g her against the wall.

Holy s**t. I felt a pulling at the base of my balls as my c**k swelled up and then emptied itself into the shower. I welcomed the sweet release as I thought about her moans and the way she screamed my name when I made love to her.

It was what I needed, even if the thoughts of wanting what I couldn’t have, tortured me. Physically, I felt a lot better.

But by the time I got out, I was late for training.

Fuck.

I hurried to throw on my workout clothes and get out the door. It was time to get out of fantasy land and back to my reality of living life without Sadie in it.

Chapter 9