Model Perfect

Chapter 11: The Perfect Girlfriend

My neck hurts at the biopsy site. It has a heartbeat, that's tender to the touch. I keep the small bandage on it to protect it from accidental bumps.

In the morning the sun dances across my blanket like it did the morning prior. I find a smoothie by my bed with a note from my ghost mom. My parents have been working night shifts and have been going on so many business trips lately, I haven't truly seen them in weeks. Now that I am eighteen, they think I am grown-up enough to be on my own.

My mother made the smoothie to help with my biopsy recovery. It's tender to talk and the bump in my neck continues to throb throughout the early morning. My phone beeps and Arlo's text message lights up my screen and my face.

Arlo: Want to hang out today, model girl? My mom is taking us sailing today.

The message reflects Arlo's intentions. It isn't a secret that Arlo wants to hang with me more. A day going sailing sounds better than listening to Aftershock practice their new shitty songs about s*x.

Jeremiah has recently written new lyrics that convey a message like, "Because I can't get you out of my head, its time to make love in my bed." I don't know what's worse how horny the lyrics sound or that the line is written for Rosa. God Rosa, will we ever be friends again. No time to worry about that.

Me: I can't hang out Arlo. Something's happened and I need to stay away from you.

Arlo: Wow. Okay. I didn't think the kiss would scare you away that easily, but I have been wrong about girls before.

His long response shows care on his part and a desire to see me. When Hunter texts it's all emojis. I feel like an Egyptologist deciphering hieroglyphs.

Me: It's not that, Arlo. Model Perfect needs me to focus on my public image for a while. And that means staying away from you. Other than our project. I'm sorry. I don't want it to be this way. I enjoyed our date.

Arlo: I understand. And thanks for admitting it was a date.

I read his text over and over. It really was a date. A first and last date, with the boy who listens to me more than anyone else right now.

Me: I'm sorry Arlo. Maybe we can do another photo session for the project later this week.

Arlo: Okay. And just know you can't brush me off that easily, Emma. I'm involved now.

Me: Got to go. Model Perfect's schedule calls me.

I delete my messages with Arlo and change his name on my phone to Anna. If Hunter sees another girl's name on my phone, he won't get suspicious. Maybe it's dishonest, but it's better than getting slapped in the face again. The red mark from yesterday is still there. It's a little red mark, with a dull ache that only my jaw can sense.

I head off to watch Aftershock. The band sounds terrible compared to their first album. They are writing their third album right now. Other than the half-assed romance song that Hunter wrote for me, they have nothing good to say. Half their lyrics have tacos or beer in the titles.

I sit in the back of the recording studio and watch them do a microphone check. Hunter puts his headphones on and our eyes meet. I feel like a victim when he smiles at me with his cigarette yellow teeth. They aren't yellow to everyone, only to me because I have kissed his lips and know his breath. I know that cigarettes make that boy behind the microphone angry. It's time to show Hunter that I am a good girlfriend.

It's about time I make a game plan with him in mind. I need to make study dates and attend all his band practices for the next few weeks to prove to him that I am indeed trying to be faithful to him and no one else. There is no one else? Right?

Arlo's eyes cross my mind, followed by his smirk, and then his dimple. These thoughts make me blush. But I ignore them and smile as Hunter sings his song about me. I clap and cheer when I'm supposed to.

I blow kisses to distract Hunter. I pretend Arlo is here, and the thought of him brings me comfort. It's the most comforting thought I've had in a while. The thought is broken by Rosa, handing me a lollipop.

"I don't want that s**t," I say, as I push her and her bag of lollipops away. She can take her sexy seductive candy and bugger off for all I care.

"Are you still mad about the other day?" Rosa says like nothing happened. She tries to find my eyes and I don't give her the satisfaction of discovering them.

"Obviously. Now you can go."

"I'm here to listen to my boyfriend practice." She says while smiling and blowing kisses to Jeremiah.

The difference between Rosa and me is she actually wants to be here. I watch their interaction and it's clear by the smile on Jeremiah's face that he is head over heels smitten by Rosa and her fiery red hair.

"You're lucky," I whisper.

"What does that mean?"

"I see the way Jeremiah looks at you. He really loves you."

Rosa looks at me and this time I let her find my eyes.

"Oh come on. Hunter loves you. Just listen to those lyrics."

I shake my head, and I decide to be bold for a moment. I turn my back on Hunter and remove a make-up remover wipe from my purse. I wipe the make-up from the left cheek where he hit me. Rosa looks at Hunter and then back at me.

"He has a weird way of showing me me loves me."

I cover up my face with make-up again, so Hunter doesn't know that I have finally shown someone the truth about him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know he did that. Did he do that after I texted him the picture of Arlo kissing your cheek?"

I nod and Rosa cries slightly. She hands me a lollipop as a peace offering. I accept her candy and know that I can't fully trust Rosa. I can't trust her with this, but news about my love life can only be shared with my diary. The diary I will never write because words on paper are eternal confessions of the mind, body, and spirit.

"Yes, Rosa. He came over and let his anger out. And apologized like he has for awhile now. It doesn't happen all the time. It's once in a while. You must not let him find out that I told you or something worse will happen to me. Do you understand?" I ask in my best church mouse voice.

"Yes, I understand. I'm sorry about the photo. I only did it to keep you on your toes. I was only trying to keep you from slumming it with that camera kid."

"That camera kid is the least of your problems. I've told Hunter I will stay away from Arlo other than our class project. So just drop it. Arlo and I are done."

Rosa looks worried like something happened between us. Nothing has happened, but deep down I wish it would. Feelings are bubbling inside me when I look at Arlo in the hallways at school. I want to hug him and ask about his day. I want to walk away from this life and talk with him under the bleachers.

The band practice stops along with our conversation. We both clap and pretend we listened to every new song. It was all white noise to me, white noise sung by a panther. Panthers are as black as night and wait until all lights go out before they make their strike. It's only a matter of time before I piss Hunter off, and I only hope I won't die at his hands. His name is fitting because he is a true killer, a true hunter after all.

My phone vibrates, and when it does Freddie, my agent's name appears on the screen with a text that reads:

Freddie: The doctor needs you to come in right away. Your results are in.

My heart stops, this can only mean one of two things. The first is I am cancer-free and can k

eep modeling or two, I am about to cry my eighteen-year-old heart out all by myself.