Model Perfect

Chapter 14: Horrendous Halloween

It's Halloween weekend, and Hunter hasn't texted me since I left his band practice early. Freddie has been buzzing my cell non-stop. I know he wants an answer from me. He wants to know if I am getting surgery He wants me to have my whole life story written down in a novel, ready to go on his desk by Monday morning with my resignation letter at hand. My life to them all is a script that they can dim the lights for, cut people out of, and shut my voice up when necessary.

Isn't it enough to them that I have to process cancer on my own? I haven't even told my parents. Do they even exist at this point? I've been flying solo for so long, I don't even remember seeing them. Rosa will write my cancer story on all her social media accounts and I am not ready for the world to know the gospel truth. That I, Emma Rhodes, have thyroid cancer.

I set my cancer aside and try to remember that it's Halloween. Hunter loved costumes, partying, pumpkins, and of course the Haunted House by the beach. Every year, Hunter drags me to the Haunted House. It's a charity-sponsored event, and of course, being a model girl comes with a price. I am to represent Model Perfect while sporting a slutty bunny outfit. It's a win-win for Model Perfect, and confusion for me.

Hunter: Hey baby, sorry I haven't texted.

I don't even want to respond. It's the same conversation we've had over the last four years. We are victims of Deja Vu. My parents used to tell me about re-run episodes where the same episode would return to their tv over and over again. If that was fate, so was our relationship. Doomed to be like those old re-run shows my parents described.

Me: It's fine. I fell asleep early and needed to come home. I wasn't feeling well. I throw up.

Hunter: Are you still coming to the Haunted House?

Me: Yes, of course. Duh. I can't miss that. You're counting on me.

Hunter: Make sure to be in costume when I come pick you up. I want to see you in your cute little bunny ears.

Me: You will don't worry.

Its hard to pretend to love Hunter. When somewhere between Huntrt hitting again and Arlo's lips finding my over and over, I've changed. I've changed from the cancer developing in my neck, I've changed because I want to kiss Arlo. It's hard to admit that, even to myself.

He's safe and gentle. The opposite of Hunter. With Hunter, the earth trembled and the moon falls out of place. With Arlo, I know who I am, he's my compass pointing me home. With Arlo, the world shines in new ways. He sees the world through a camera lens, the light reflects what is truly there. Through that lens, I am this new and beautiful girl. Somewhere between classes, this dumb assignment, and being comforted I've found time to fall for someone else...and that someone isn't Hunter.

If Arlo ever found out the truth, that I've fallen for him...a little. He might reject me. Sure we have fun kissing, but what man wouldn't. There are moments when I want to mean more to him, than I probably do. Tabula rasa such a simple term he used, but its opened doors for me. I've entered a hallway of possibilities because of Arlo. I can leave Model Perfect and be with him. I can be myself, I can be me. Perhaps I can even let go and be free.

Hunter's name fades into the dull background of my cell phone. When the screen turns black, his name disappears, and it's as if for a moment he doesn't exist. If Hunter stopped existing perhaps I could truly escape my life. If only that were true.

Rosa Higgins invites herself to my house. I won't mention Arlo or my cancer. I will just tell her I got sick. That's what I will tell them all when they ask. Details get out and gossip spreads like that fire that burned down Chicago in the early nineteenth century. The gossip queen would be the wildfire in my life that I don't need, spreading my truth into the void empty places of the internet.

"Hey, b***h are you ready to go to the Haunted House?"

I hate it when Rosa greets me like this after we fight. She thinks its a way to make up for our awkwardness. The truth is we will never go back to that deep intimate friendship we once had. She's told my truth and it slapped me in the face. She apologized and felt bad, but anything with her is a fallen domino waiting to happen.

"Yep," I say putting on my slutty black cat suit. It even comes with whispers and paws. I take a picture of myself in the bathroom mirror. I lock the door and send the photo to Arlo. Will this even get his attention? I delete the messages in case Rosa finds my phone. I squeeze my chest together and make a duck face with my puckered lips and send him another photo.

Arlo: You have my attention. What do you want, hottie?

Me: Did you just call me hot?

Arlo: You're the one texting me photos. Where are you going?

Me: Haunted House by the beach. Can you come just in case something bad happens?

I need him there. Knowing Hunter something shitty will happen and I will need Arlo there. He's rescued me so many times, that I've gotten used to it by now.

Arlo: Sure. Anything for you model girl.

Me: Arlo....

Arlo: Emma.....

Me: I like you.

Fuck did I just hit the send button? Where did that come from? I'm not supposed to tell him that.

Arlo: You do?

Me: I like spending time with you. Can we talk about everything sometime?

Arlo: Sure. For what its worth. I like you, too.

I don't respond. I close my eyes and sigh. I bite my lips and look at myself in the mirror. Arlo sends me a picture of himself. Its a head shot of that sexy smirk of his. I save it to a hidden app in my phone and delete the rest of our texts.

Me: Thanks. You look good to. See you at the Haunted House.

I continue to delete our conversation.

"Emma, what the hell are you doing in there?" Rosa asks.

"I look stupid." Its the only reply I can come up with.

"Open the door and let me see." She has me turn around and do funny posses.

"Well? How bad am I?"

"You look hot." And I know she's right because somewhere in living a memory a boy I like told me what he thinks about me and that's worth everything.

Somewhere between Rosa's lollipop panic. A bad GPS and a lot of swearing we arrive at the Haunted House. I get out of the car and greet Hunter. I kiss him on the lips and image, Arlo, when I do. In the far-off distance of the Haunted House, is Arlo taking photos with his camera for the school yearbook. I hope he gets into a good college that appreciates his talents.

"Hey babe, let's go into the Haunted House." Hunter knows I hate haunted anything. But makes me go every year, I hate it. I hate his love of horror movies. I close my eyes through most of those films.

"I don't want to go in there, Hunter. I'm already wearing this stupid outfit for you. Can't that be enough?"

His smirk shows his selfish side. There is no dimple, only a domineering prick out to make my life hell.

"We're going in there, whether you like it or not. I don't want to have to hurt you again, Emma." He whispers into my ear making the tips of my ears rise and burn. I comply against my better judgment.

The haunted house is dark. There are no glow sticks, phones, or flashlights. Hunter pokes me in the back like he is trying to stab me with a knife. Sometimes I wonder if deep down, he really does want to end my life. That's why I no longer piss him off, because to me he's dangerous enough to be put behind bars.

Somewhere between my adrenaline and fear of the Haunted House, Hunter ditches me in the darkness. I walk for ten minutes calling out for him, and nothing replies. Damn it, Rosa, why did you have to go to the bathroom and avoid this stupid Haunted House?

I hear whispers in the next room and I don't make a sound.

"Are you going to tell her?" Jeremy asks.

"No, would you tell your girlfriend you slept with her modeling competition?"

"I guess not. I need to get Rosa, mate."

I cover my mouth. If he knows I know, then that's surely the end of me. I know I kissed Arlo behind Hunter's back, but I didn't sleep with anyone this goes beyond trust. It goes beyond anything logical. I gasp in the blackness and Hunter's hand finds my mouth. I want to scream but can't. Jeremy's gone off to find Rosa. Being alone in the dark with Hunter sucks.

"Having fun, Emma? Does it feel good to know that truth about me? Yes, I f****d Tanya Pennington. What I never told Jeremy, is that she wouldn't stop asking me to stop. Like you're about to do for me right now."

"Hunter, leave me alone." I can't see a damn thing and he's big. Bigger than anything else in the black of Halloween night.

"I wish I could. But we're bound by contract. And we have to pretend to be in love. So show me some love."

"I'm breaking up with you." I say out loud. I hear a rustling sound in the next room over. Shoes scuff the floor and yet he continues his fear tactics.

"If you break up with me, I will find you when you least expect it and end you." He whispers down my neck for all my goosebumps to hear.

"Get off me" He puts his hand down my pants and starts touching me in ways that he likes, that I don't. My sweat is out of control. The room is grey and hazy. The shoe sounds from earlier get louder, as I feel the weight of Hunter being pulled off me.

"She said get off, douche bag." Arlo Finch has found me in the blackest of hell.

I get behind Arlo and tremble behind him. He punches Hunter in the mouth, who takes it as a warning punch. Arlo is stronger than Hunter, it's no secret. But for me its the most reassuring strength I have right now.

If Arlo didn't find me, I would probably be dead. Because Hunter likes to play with his victims. And he's just confessed to me, the horrendous acts he's performed against Tanya Pennington and for her sake I hope they aren't true.

"Are you okay, Emma?" I nod and squeeze my legs together. The worst is over. All he did was finger me without asking, without consent. I am grateful it wasn't more, because with cancer on my neck, I can't handle anymore pain.

"Can you take me home? I just really need to be home right now?"

I text Rosa that I had an emergency so she won't worry. At some point, the truth about Hunter will catch up with him. I only hope I don't have to be murdered in order for that to happen.

Arlo drives me home and the moon follows us. I hate Halloween, what used to be costumes and fun. Is now fear, panic, and an asshole laughing in a Haunted House. Nothing is scarier than this Halloween. As Arlo squeezes my hand, I know I can face the demons and ghosts of tonight with him by my side. To make sure its not in my head, I squeeze his hand and he squeezes mine a little tighter bringing a little bit of happiness back with it.