Scars of Time

Chapter 64: "The bad guy"

Hope's POV

I was attempting to browse through social media, but my eyes were growing heavy and closing on their own accord. Out of nowhere, a knock on the door jolted me back to reality but without waiting for me to answer, he barged into the room with a pillow in his hand.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to sleep here." he remarked, not a care in the world, and nonchalantly positioned himself beside me.

"Why?"

"Because I want to."

"Alex. You do realize this is weird, right?"

"Why? We are just going to sleep. Unless you want something else." His face remained as serious as ever, but I could sense the familiar undertone of mockery in his words. However, I was simply too exhausted to engage in another argument.

"Can I ask you something first?"

"What is it?"

"Are you scared of darkness?"

"No." he chuckled. "Why?"

"I don't know. You always sleep with me whenever you come over. You even slept with Time on New Year's."

"I didn't sleep with Time. He slept on the other couch" he instantly became defensive yet, he had no plans to give in or move an inch. Instead, he settled in, making himself comfortable by readjusting the pillow beneath his head.

I had to give up. I don't have the energy for this. I'm just going to call it a night and sleep.

However, as I turned my back on him and closed my eyes, I was taken aback by the unexpected sensation of his hands around my stomach, pulling me closer towards him. I found myself completely frozen, unable to make a single move. Just as I told myself I would start over and that includes my situation ship with him too.

I've made up my mind to stop trying to seduce him. He can go back to Jo if he wants to. Or he can find someone else completely. But whatever happens, I'm not going to stay in his way anymore, and I'm not going to beg for his love either. I tried so hard to make it work, but it seemed like he didn't care at all. No matter what I do, he always seems to be just out of reach. Now it's time for me to focus on myself and my own happiness, maybe even on finding someone who will love me for who I am.

But I realized it is not going to be that easy as my heart yearned to escape its confines, just because it was enticed by the tantalizing heat of his body pressed against mine and the soft caress of his breath upon my neck.

At that moment all the doubts and fears that had been swirling around in my head vanished, replaced by a sense of peace and contentment.

He was making moving on so difficult but as for this moment I decided to let him embrace me. Even if I knew why he hugged me. He misses someone else, yet I still let myself sink into his arms. As if my body was betraying my mind, craving a touch from a man who could never truly be mine.

Only this time I let him hug me, promising to myself that this was going to be the last one. Because I've decided that from now, there is nothing more important for me than healing my own heart.

I'm not going to let anyone hurt it anymore.

Not even the man I love.

....................

Alex's POV

I don't know what came over me, but I wanted to sleep in her embrace tonight. She didn't turn around and didn't even acknowledge my presence. I hugged her tightly and she didn't move at all.

She let me hug her but this time it felt different. There was some coldness in it that I tried so hard to ignore. It seemed as though she already knew the reason behind my embrace. The truth is, I yearn for Jo's presence, but alas, I can no longer hold her in my arms. Thus, I sought solace in the embrace of Hope, drawing her near and seeking solace in the comforting warmth of her body. For she alone possesses the power to erase all other thoughts from my mind.

But even as I held her, I knew that it wasn't fair to her. She deserves someone who could love her the way she deserves to be loved. I tried to tell her the other day that I didn't deserve her sympathy. But she didn't listen.

I'm a bad person. And I didn't know this fact about myself until I met Hope.

I am selfish and cruel.

Can't love her but can't let her go either.

I know my actions cause pain on her, yet I am unable to stop. I find myself into her arms every time and although I have promised countless times that we are just going to be friends, I still find myself admiring the nape of her neck, wanting to leave little red marks and then watch them disappear one by one.

Right now, as she was letting me hug her, I knew she had made a decision. Maybe she has given up on me already. But I don't think I'm strong enough to let her do so. As I said, I have become a bad person since the day I met her. Although I might not be able to love her the way she deserves, I can't bear to see her with someone who does.

I knew that I was doing the wrong thing but I couldn't help myself. I couldn't bear the thought of being alone again.

Even If that means I have to be the villain in her story.

The next two days went by so fast.

All we talked about was the time she needed to go to work and get picked up from work. Despite my attempts to engage in small talk and ask questions, she responded curtly and obediently settled into the car as I chauffeured her to her destinations. I couldn't fathom why, but this situation was slowly driving me insane.

Today she had another patient very late at night, and I was too tired to drive back home so I decided to sleep in the car so I would not be late in the morning for her shift. But a knock on the window woke me up, and I was ready to fight whoever it was.

As I slowly opened one eye, I was met with the blinding beam of a flashlight directed at my face. Instinctively I raised my hand to shield my vision, trying to catch a glimpse of the person holding it.

"We have a guest room too you know?" Time said, and I only recognized him by his voice because otherwise I couldn't see him.

"You do? Then why does your sister make me sleep in your room every time I come over."

"So, that's why I feel like I started having a roommate lately!!"

"You didn't know?"

"No clue."

"Then you should also know that I have some of your clothes in my closet as well. I'll bring them back as soon as I wash them."

"It's all starting to make sense now" he said, and opened the door to let me step out of my car.

"Do you really have a guest room?" I asked again just to make sure he wasn't playing with me.

"Haven't you noticed it? It's on the first floor."

"That means she was just trying to make me suffer by making me sleep in your room as if there was no other room in the house."

A sigh escaped him as he proudly stated, "That's my sister."

"Anyway, did you just come home?"

"Yeah. I had some work to do."

"You should come home earlier. Don't leave your sister alone for this long."

"That's why I hired you. So you can stay with her. And I see you are not leaving her side for even a second."

"Because it's dangerous."

"Yeah. Yeah. That's why" he made fun of me as if we were close.

"By the way, what happened with Evan Astor? Did anything come out from the tests?" I asked curiously.

"Nothing. I think he might have really lost it this time. He doesn't remember his own name. Every doctor that I have showed the results tell me the same thing. Brain trauma from falling. It's evident."

"Still, You can't trust him too much. I'm protecting Hope, but you should be careful too."

"I will. Thanks, Alex. I appreciate what you do for us, or for Hope. She can never know that Evan Astor is alive. Not now that she has finally started moving on." As those words escaped his lips, a sudden commotion echoed from the staircase, prompting both of us to dash towards it. There, we found Hope, seated on the floor, her knee drenched in blood and her eyes brimming with tears. With a gaze that could pierce through steel, she confronted Time, demanding, "Is Evan Astor alive?" In that moment, I witnessed the vanishing of trust from her eyes, realizing that she may never place her faith in another soul again.

How could she, when it was he own brother who betrayed her.