Chapter 2

1070 Words
"You're pregnant." The word sounded like something out of a horror movie in our tiny bathroom three weeks later, and I stared at the test in my hand like it might change its answer if I looked at it hard enough but the bright two pink lines were as clear as day. "No." My voice came out strangled and small. "No, this isn't happening, it shouldn't be happening Celine" I ran out of the bathroom and into the room, locking the door behind me. But the test didn't care about my denial neither did the other two tests sitting on the counter, all showing the same devastating result that I was pregnant from a stupid and reckless one night stand with a beautiful man I knew nothing about. Not even his goddamn name, the only evidence of what we had was a tissue paper with the note ‘’ Thank you for the night I will never forget “. My hands started shaking so hard I had to set the test down before I dropped it. This couldn't be real, No, it couldn't be happening, I'm just a brokeass twenty-five year old struggling to survive and stay afloat. I couldn't have a baby even if I wanted to, I couldn't possibly afford to keep myself fed most days. A baby? My hand moved automatically to my still flat stomach, I couldn't wrap my head around the fact that there was a person in there, that a tiny human created from a reckless night of terrible decisions, a child whose father I would never see again because I didn't even know his name. "Tina?" Celine's voice brought me back to earth. "Are you okay?" I opened the door and her face fell when she saw my panicked expression and the tears that managed to slip off. She didn't bother to ask what's wrong before she pulled me into a fierce hug while I fell apart in her arms. "All three?" she asked quietly. I nodded against her shoulder, crying so hard I could barely breathe. This was a disaster, an actual nightmare because how was I supposed to do this? How was I supposed to raise a baby when I could barely take care of myself? "Okay," Celine said, her voice steady even though I was completely losing it. "Okay, it's going to be okay. Let's sit down and figure this out." I felt her hand guiding me till I felt the couch against my leg, I curled into it hugging my knees, and trying to remember how to breathe normally. "Do you want to keep it?" Celine asked gently. The question made me freeze. Did I? I'd never really thought about having kids because It was always something distant and theoretical, something for future Martina to worry about after she got her life together. But now, with my hand on my stomach and the reality of it crushing my chest, I knew I couldn't afford to part with this life inside of me. "Yes." The word came out certain despite the terror flooding my body. "I want to keep it." "Alright, Then we figure out how to make it work. Together" Celine grabbed my hands. "You're not alone in this, me and your aunt are here to help you." I nodded, cleaning the tears with the back of my hand. "I need a real job." That was the most sensible thing to do right now. "I can't raise a baby on freelance income, hell I barely survive on freelance income." "What about that position you bookmarked last week? The one at Blackwood Innovations?" I'd bookmarked it as a fantasy. Everyone knew Blackwood Innovations was one of the biggest tech companies in Manhattan, and it's not open to the common person. The position was for a senior designer on some major project and even though the pay was incredible and the benefits were even better, it was also completely out of my league. "I'm not qualified for that." "Your portfolio is amazing and you know it." Celine was already pulling up my laptop. "What do you have to lose?" Maybe everything, I thought but honestly what choice did I have? Heaven knew I needed this. I spent the next three hours polishing and perfecting my application, I tweaked and rewrote my cover letter until every word looked right to me and when I finally hit the submit button I felt a tiny flicker of hope trying to ignite in my chest while I said a word of prayer to the universe hoping it favors me unlike previous applications. Maybe I could do this and everything would be okay. Three days later I already archived the thoughts so I don't overthink things, I've spent the better part of my days applying for new gigs and doing research on how to care for myself and the life I'm carrying, I was going through some of my pregnancy guide mail when saw the mail from blackwood in my inbox, I didn't realize I was screaming so loudly till Celine ran in half naked looking scared. "What happened?" She breathed heavily looking around the room like she expected something to leap out. "I got an interview." I laughed through the tears, probably looking completely unhinged but I was past the point of caring. "It's tomorrow and you wouldn't believe it but it's at Blackwood f*****g Innovations” "Girl, that's amazing. I knew you could do it!” she wrapped me in her usual motherly warm hug. "I'm going to mess it up." The panic was already setting in, probably exaggerated by the pregnancy hormones. "I'm pregnant and terrified. Celine, this is my only shot and I can't afford to screw this up." "You won't mess it up." Celine gripped my shoulders, forcing me to look at her. "You're going to walk in there tomorrow and show them how brilliant you are and they will be a big fool not to hire you after which you're going to give your baby the best life possible." I nodded eagerly hoping the universe agreed with her words. That night, I lay in bed with my hand on my stomach, whispering promises to the tiny life growing inside me. "I'm going to take care of you even if I don't know how yet, but I will. We're going to be okay." I could feel it in my bones.
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