Heart at Race

Chapter 4

ALEXANDRA ALARCON

He's apologizing?

What happened to his pride kung dati nga ako 'yong palaging suyo ng suyo sa kanya. I never thought that he would come back and ask for another chance of our relationship, when in fact ito naman ang gusto niya.

I begged him to stay but he refused.

***Flashback***

I was crying. . .

Hindi ko na mabilang kung ilang basong luha na ang na iyak ko simula nang maghiwalay kami ni Sam.

I WAS SO DEVASTATED!

I Became wasted.

Sleepless nights,

Namamagang mga mata sa kaka iyak gabi gabi.

We're here sa roof top ng building namin and I am kneeling here in front of him begging him for a second chance. Begging him to stay.

"SAM!! please I'm begging you. I can't do this, I can't last in each day with out you. Sam halos ikaw na ang mundo ko. Simula nang maging tayo, sa iyo na umikot ang mundo ko. I am being controlling because I'm afraid I might loose you for some other girls prettier than me. I'm possesive for one reason. It's because I f*****g love you Sam! Please let's give it another try? I'll be more patient. I'll be more sensitive. I'll change those characteristics that I have that you don't like. Please just stay. Let's start over? Please? "

Kinain ko lahat nang pride ko para masabi lahat iyon. I was crying so hard to the point na hindi ko na inisip ang kahihiyang ginawa ko.

"It's over Xan! And we're not getting back together! It's over! I'm DONE! AND I DON'T LOVE YOU, STAND UP!

I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN! OKAY? "

halos ikabingi ko ang mga binitawan niyang salita. .

we're finally over!

and it hurts!

***End of Flashback***

A part of myself is trying to understand him. A part of myself want him back.

What should I do?

I want to be better. I want to forget him totally but my heart says the opposite. I want him back. I want him back!!!

'Oh! Please give me your guidance!'

Pababa na rin ako matapos kong magbihis nang isang simpleng dress. Spaghetti design nang stripe white dress na suot ko, medyo may kaiksian ang damit ko hindi aabot sa tuhod.

Nakita ko ang dalawang pares nang mga matang natingin sa akin.

One is Sam and the other is Kurt.

I walked towards the direction where my parents is sitting. Doon rin nakaupo sina Sam at Kurt.

I feel uneasy sa set up namin..

why??

'KASI HALOS MAHALIKAN NA AKO NI KURT KANINA!!! mabuti nalang at dumating si Dad!

He saved me from my first kiss!

AND...

I just refused to Sam'

"Oh, hija. Your here. Sit here sweetie. "

tinapik ni Mommy and upuan malapit sa kanya which is the only chair left.

I seated silently. Binati ako ng maligayang kaarawan nang parents ni Sam and Kurt.

"Ahm, let's talk about the business deal your offering Mr. Perterson." pagsisimula ni Dad sa usapin.

They talked about business. Nag propose nang isang business proposal si Mr. Peterson para sa kanilang negosyo.

He's trying to pursuade my parents to his proposal.

"And, infact it's a good thing since our children is in a relationship after all. Hindi na rin sila mahihirapan kung e arrange marraige natin sila at ang possible partnership nang ating mga kompanya Mr. Alarcon. " pagsasaad ni Mr. Peterson na siyang ikinagulat ko.

"Is it true Xan? You're in a relationship with Sam again? " Nagtatakang tanong sa akin ni Mommy.

"Ah.... Ahmm.. ", hindi ko masabing Hindi dahil apart of myself is happy. Kung sakaling e arrange marraige man ako ay sa lalaking minahal ko pa. Pero, siya rin kasi ang unang nanakit sa akin nang sobra.

"Yes, tita. I and Xan is in a relationship, right Xan? " said Sam. Para akong tangang nakatulala pero nang nag sink in sa akin ang sinabi nya nayuko ko nalang ang ulo ko. I know Sam. He doesn't want to disappoint his Dad.

"No, we're not. I'm sorry Mr. Perterson but Sam and I broke up 2months ago. "

Nakatungong tugon ko sa kanyang tanong. Ayokong magsinungaling. I never lied to my parents. I don't want to lie to myself either.

"Xan... " , i heard him uttered my name. I get what he wants to say. Gusto niyang sumang-ayon ako sa gusto niyang palabasin.

But, I'm no longer in a relationship with him. So I must say the truth.

"Sam broke up with me 2 months ago." pagpapatuloy ko. sabay diin sa puntong siya ang nakipaghiwalay sa akin at hindi ako.

"Sorry, I'm mistaken. Sam never told me that the two of you broke up. I'm sorry hija." , paghingi nag paumanhin nang kanyang ama pero mahihimigan sa boses nito ang pagkadismaya.

"It's okay Mr. Peterson. In fact we can't also consider your proposal since I am in a partnership with my very close friend here Mr. Castillo anyway. His company is with the AXA company for a long time and I can't turn him down. We're sorry."

Daddy spoke and I can sense a tension between Mr. Peterson and Mr. Castillo. They we're in the same field of business and I can feel that Mr. Peterson is threatened.

Sam stood up when his father signaled him to go with him. They had a little talk far from us so we can't hear them.

I didn't bother of their presence anymore until mom talked and ask me.

"Hey! Are you alright? Are you happy with your birthday celebration?"

"Of course Mom. Thank you so much. I told you na hindi na ka na dapat naghanda pa. But you did, and thank you cause I liked it, Mom."

"It's for you sweetie, infact hindi kami makakapayag nang Daddy mo na walang debut party ang nag iisang unica hija namin. We will always make your birthday special honey. Unless someone does it more special in the future. "

Hindi ko medyo nakuha ang point ni mommy pero tumango nalang ako sa pagsang ayon. They never failed to impress me in their parenting ways. Hindi masyadong mahigpit pero hindi rin naman maluwag.

Mommy spoke at pinakilala sa akin ang mga kasama namin sa mesa.

"By the way sweetheart, this is your tita Elaine and your tito Nathan and their son Sean Kurt. They are the Castillo's. The owner of the Castillo Multi Corp. and they are the AXA Group of Companies partner for almost a decade. Bestfriends rin ang daddy mo at daddy ni Kurt. By the way, our daughter Alexandra.", baling niya pabalik sa mag asawang Castillo.

"Hello po. Nice to finally meet you po. I heard a lot about your family and your businesses as well. But I haven't heard any about your son.", nakangiting bati ko sa kanila pero may kunting ilang parin kay Kurt.

Binati naman ako pabalik nina Tita at Tito. Pero nahinto nag pagkakamustahan namin nang sa gitna nag tawanan ay bumalik sa mesa ang mag amang Peterson.

"Sorry, for the interruption. I just discussed some important things with my son."

"It's okay Mr. Peterson. Let's just enjoy the food. "

Kumain kami at nagkwentohan naman ang mga nakakatanda. They we're laughing talking about those business trips they had. Until they become serious when Mr. Peterson insisted to have business meeting with dad to formally discuss their proposal.

Nagbabakasakali si Mr. Peterson na ereconsider ni Dad and proposal niya since maraming projects and AXA this year.

We will have expansion sa business namin outside the Philippines.

Nang hindi na ako nakinig at nakiintriga sa mga pinaguusapan nila ay tahimik akong sumisipsip nang champagne na isinerve ng waiter sa table namin.

Katabi ko si Kurt sa kanan at si Mommy naman ang sa kaliwa. Kurt assisted me sa paglagay ng champagne sa wine glass ko.

I feel my hurt beating so fast nang magtama ang mga paningin namin. He genuinely smiled at me. A very wide smile on his face makes my heart flutters.

I can't feel those unexplainable feeling. Those butterflies in my stomach. The uneasiness when he's around.

I also smiled at him back. Ayoko namang mag mukhang suplada sa harapan ng parents namin.

I heard a lot about his family from mom and dad's stories but I never heard any about Kurt.

Hindi nakukwento ni Dad na may anak pala ang mga Castillo na ka edad ko lang.

Nakakadalawang baso na ako nang magsalita si Sam na nakaupo sa tapat ko.

"Tita, Tito Alexis. May I take this opportunity to ask you both if may I court your daughter again? I just love her so much but I was dumb before when I let her go. I'm sorry po. I just really want her back. "

Namayani ng katahimikan sa buong mesa namin. Me myself was shocked sa sinabi ni Sam. I already refused lately noong nagkausap kami. I never thought he is serious to the point he really asked my parents approval.

'Oh My!'