The Eternal

Can I Die Yet?

I gasped for air as I shot up from the water of the bathtub, coughing as Madam Kerine rolled her eyes, scoffing in disapproval. Yes, she was in the bathing chamber whilst I bathed; did she care that I was naked? No. Will I tell her I feel incredibly exposed by her presence? No, again. She sat behind the tub, and took the bar of soap she had been torturing me with, rubbing it into my head like she was trying to create an indent in my skull. She scratched the soap practically into my hair follicles, and then dunked me under the water again to rinse the soap out.

I always despised baths, and being in here for two hours already was enough to drive me even more insane than I already am. When I came back up, I grabbed the walls of the tub, not letting her shove me back down again. “Is this a trial?” I asked, glaring at the cursed throthy water as it lapped at my knees. “Why do you ask?” She pondered, dumping a bowl of water on my head. I sputtered, spitting the water out of my mouth and onto the stone floor outside the tub. “If this was a trial, I could drown myself and still be claimed to have fought in the trials- Why!?”

She smacked my head with the bowl.

“You will succeed in the trials, Abby. Do you understand me?” Her voice was cold, slicing through any playfulness I could have possibly mustered up. I nodded silently, and let her finish without protest. “Do you really think I’ll succeed?” I asked, my eyes trained on the throthy water while I moved my spread fingers through it, as if I was combing back hair. Madam Kerine paused, before she dunked me again.

“No. I have doubts you won’t die during the first trial, let alone complete them all.”

I shook my head like a dog, and harshly wiped the soap from my eyes, the sting making them water. “You didn’t have to drown me to say that!” I blubbered, heaving myself over the bathtub wall and landing on the floor with a wet thump. Madam Kerine grunted in acknowledgment, and threw a towel on my chest. “Dry off and get dressed. We leave as soon as you finish, so don’t be more than 10 minutes.”

I sat up, and just stared at the towel that was now in my lap, my thoughts circling around one issue: I’ll have to actually participate in the trails. This thought, though probably one I should have had before I agreed to do this, was not one that had popped into my brain until I was trying to get some sleep last night. It kept me awake for hours, until I was too tired to think and fell asleep, only to be woken up an hour later to get ready for today. Why I couldn’t just sleep in a few minutes, Madam Kerine refuses to share.

I never thought of myself as the kind of person for this task. Well, okay. I have. But only once. I stopped that thought from continuing as soon as I had it. I was beginning to think of hanging myself again. Honestly, that would be so much better than this. I shook the thought away, though, as I dried myself off and tugged on my clothes that I still severely needed to wash. If I hang myself, then my death won’t be epic. That’s what I need; an epic death. A death people will talk about for centuries to come. Imagine, people sitting down in a tavern for a few drinks, and they start talking about a boy named Abaddon Meir, who was a participant in the Trials of the Eternal. The boy who died during a trial by being impaled to death by a narwhal's horn. That. That is how I want to die; a perfect, bloody, painful, gruesome, unforgettable death. “It’s settled,” I said to myself, “I’m going to go to the trials, and when I find a potential epic death, I’ll take it. Perfect.”

I made my way to the landing dock, and saw Madam Kerine and the Highest Elder, waiting for me. Merid was no doubt already inside, enjoying the royal starship that was sent to take us to the trial. With one sharp look, Madam Kerine went inside, while the Highest Elder smiled at me. “Here,” She whispered, taking one of her many necklaces from around her neck. This one was one I had always looked at as a child; it was a dark brown leather cord, with a hand carved wooden key on it. I had always wondered what it went to. “You keep this close to your heart, dear. Don’t you lose it, and don’t ever give it away. Not until your time leaves you.” She ordered, making me nod.

“Yes, ma’am. Should I return it to you?”

She chuckled, patting my cheek after she set the necklace around my neck, putting it under my shirt so it couldn’t be seen. “No, Abaddon. You keep it, and when the time is right, you will know what to do with it.” She answered, and I nodded again, still confused but burning her words to memory anyway. “Good boy. Now. Listen carefully, and remember-” Her voice turned stern. “-always go with your gut and heart’s answers, but always follow your heads’ plans. Never, Abaddon Meir, and I mean never, should you choose to do something that your gut and heart know is not for you. All of this training is what Madam Kerine and Merid believe is best for you. But only you can know that. Do you hear me, boy?” She left as soon as she finished, and I watched her go, knowing that I would do exactly as she told me to, no matter how many times anybody would tell me not to, without a single complaint.

***

The starship was a little outdated, but I spent most of my time being drilled and forced to train, so I didn’t really notice. I actually only knew it was outdated because Merid whined about it every 5 seconds. “Ignore him, Abby. he’s only acting like that because no one can make him stop. He’ll be put in his place when we land.” Madam Kerine was exceptionally annoyed at Merid, which could be seen through her twitching eyes and tightly clenched jaw.

Back to the topic of death. Particularly my death, or, more specifically, the planning of it. My first suggestion or being impaled by a narwhal is an amazing idea, but is it really a realistic one? Unless one of the trials is actually fighting narwhals, I’m afraid not. Maybe I’ll just throw myself into the direction of a stampede. Drowning? No, that must be saved for Madam Karine. Strangulation? Oh, I know! I could cut my own heart out! That sounds absolutely insane, and therefore, absolutely wonderful. As I continued my plans, inspecting the sword Madam Karine had at her side for me. She adjusted it closer to her, and I cursed, avoiding her knowing eyes. "Do not go offing yourself until I give the word, Abby. You need to complete some tasks first."

I rolled my eyes, my chin heavily sitting in my palm as I sulked. Most would consider her words rude, needing me to be a puppet before I kill myself, but, for me, her words brought comfort; I would be allowed death, in exchange for my assistance, which, for Madam Karine, I would do sometimes… Okay, on rare occasions. I don't listen very well, or very often, but as the landing landing dock came into view, and Madam Karine slapped Merid across the back to shut him up, I knew that, in order to do what I truly wanted to do-- like the elder said-- I would have to do what was asked of me first. That's okay. I could hold out for a little while. Madam Karine tapped my shoulder, and I followed her and Merid silently, the sword she had for me now strapped to my hip.

"You are now our Warrior, Abby. Act like one." Madam Karine grunted, and I nodded as she placed our clans crest-- deadly nightshade and other poisonous plants, intricately sewn together in black and gold thread-- on my chest, her eyes flashing for a fraction of a second with anxiety, as she looked me up and down, giving me a nod of approval. "You look the part now." She confirmed, and I gave her a grin, her mouth twitching as she most likely fought back a fury of disapproval. As the three of us took a step onto our clans watch box, I noticed a contrast between our warriors’ pen and watchbox, from the other warrior pens and watchboxes.

Ours was the only watch box completely empty.

The entire watchbox, besides where Merid draped himself across an armchair, and where Madam Karine stood by the door, was completely bare; no people, no sounds, no pictures, no food, no water. Just a scoreboard and Merid’s chair. I leaned against the railing, and looked down at the arena. “This is where all of the trials besides the final trials will take place.” Madam Karine explained, and I nodded, not really listening. My eyes scanned the other watchboxes, packed full of people, until they eventually made it to the warriors’ pen. Upon inspection, I instantly realized that everyone had been waiting on us for so long, that they now only had me to size up for the contest. I highly doubt they were very impressed. I picked at my fingers, pulling at my raw and bitten-off cuticles. All of them were at least twice my age, large, and menacing. It was exceptionally clear that they trained their whole lives for this day. I haven’t even been training for a whole month, not to mention I’m a third of their size; I was lean, not muscular, and lanky, with hardly any meat on my bones from lack of eligible nutricion.

Madam Karine stood at my side, hand on my shoulder as she scanned my opponents. Each of them turned their heads, avoiding her gaze. "They're afraid of you." I observed, but Madam Karine shook her head. "No. They're afraid of me having trained you. You see them, talking to their clan masters? They're trying to find a part of this equation to prove you and I have no connection. They're afraid of what I taught you to do; therefore, they're afraid of you." She explained, her tone holding a sliver of pride as she looked into the watchbox that sat higher than the others. "That is the King's watchbox." She stood behind me, hand under my chin to make me look at the roofed balcony. I could feel it in my shriveled-up soul; whatever warrior the king was hoping to keep, was a warrior worth immense fear. I grinned wildly.

"Oh-ho-ho, This will be absolutely amazing."

She smacked the back of my head.

“This is anything but ‘amazing,’ Abby. Our clan hasn’t joined these games in almost 50 years because of how easily we have been defeated in the past. It’s your job to give us a good reason to not come back next year. Do you understand me?” She hissed through her teeth, and I gulped. “But if it’s been that long, then how would the warriors know you?” I asked, and she scoffed, grumbling about washing my mouth with lard if I kept up my antics. All that means is that I called her bluff for how long we’ve been out of the running. I bet it’s only been about 25 years or so; only long enough for me not to recall in my lifetime. Madam Karine looked down at the arena, and I followed her gaze to the obstacles-- tall, short, curved, angled, sharp, blunt structures made to be used as cover and as a weapon during the trials. Some of the structures even led to underground tunnels, their pitch black passageways bringing familiarity and a somewhat comforting chill down my spine.

Just like home.

Madam Karine agreed silently by her approving eyes scanning each tunnel. “You have advantages in the tunnels.” She hummed. “Survive until the night, and then strike in the dark; our house’s members aren’t called ‘The Darklings’ by the King for no reason, Abaddon.” I nodded once more, the railing of our watchbox cutting into my palms as I gripped the metal in excitement. I took one last look at my opponents, meeting their eyes and giving them childish, bright smiles while waving at them happily. Most scoffed, the eldest one grinned and waved back, and the King's warrior could not be seen.

This will be fantastic.

***

“It is now time to begin!”

I stuck out my tongue, grunting and panting as I used the glue a servant thankfully brought me to reattach the soles of my shoes. The announcer for the King had started reminding people about the Trials’ history and rules, before he started calling off warriors to have them come into the arena and present themselves and their houses. I would be last, but the soles needed to be pressed to the shoe firmly before I could walk in my boots to the arena. “Hurry up, Abby! It’s almost your turn!” Madam Karine demanded as I delicately applied the glue to the key parts of the soles. “I am hurrying!” I argued, lining up the soles to the bottoms of the shoes perfectly, before I stood on the soles and glued the seams shut. Now, to stand and wait. I slid my feet to the door, being careful to keep pressure on the soles, and wiped some glue that got pushed out away with my finger, rubbing it into my skin to get rid of it.

“...And Lastly, Abaddon Meir, from the House of Fatality!”

Silence.

“Get going!” Madam Karine shoved me down the stairs, and I rolled all the way down and into the arena, landing face first in a pile of sand. I slowly got to my feet, frowning as sand seeped through my soles and into my shoes-- that glue wasn’t very good-- and strolled over to the other warriors, getting in line at the end, next to the one that waved back to me. He wasn’t grinning anymore, though; he looked at me in shock, and pity. Pity for what? No clue. Shock? Maybe because I’m the youngest one here; all I know is I don’t like the pity one bit. I glanced at my house’s watchbox, and saw Merid and Madam Karine leaning against the railing with expectant faces.

Gods be damned; they really are sadistic, sending a barely-man to die, aren’t they?

I’m hysterically funny.

They went down the line, starting at the other end so I would be last, and had the watchboxes introduce their warriors and their ages. It was increasingly clear, as the man next to me was 68, that I was by far the youngest person in the arena. Merid was the one to introduce me, and it went like this: “Our boy is Abaddon Meir, ripely aged at 22! Don’t go easy on him!” His voice matched his sadistic eyes as they widened in excitement toward the end of his words. I loosely recalled seeing that look on his face many times before, but couldn’t dwell on it, as the King started to speak from the darkness of his watchbox.

“Today, we gather all the houses and their... toughest warriors, in order to find a warrior fit for a King’s hand! All warriors have been presented, seen fit for the trials, and have been reviewed on the trials to come.--” Uh, no we all have not “--Henceforth, Let the first trial commence!” Cheering had ensued after the King finished his speech, and all of the warriors moved to the stairs they came down, so I did as well, following suit. We all looked toward each other once more, and I realized fairly quickly that they were all staring not at each other, but at me. I looked for the staircase where the King's warrior was on his way down, and waited whilst I watched. After a moment, I looked at my house’s watchbox, and realized they hadn’t known about any of the trials, either. I looked to the warrior at the neighboring staircase on my left, and gave him a pleading look of help.

He shook his head.

I mouthed “please.”

He jogged over, and leaned in close so no one else could hear. “The first trial is a simple test of endurance; we start from our entrances, and whoever runs laps about the arena the longest wins.” He whispered, quickly making his way back to his staircase. I gave him a thankful smile, and positioned myself in the direction the other warriors were facing, getting ready for the running to start. Just before the trial started did the King's warrior come into the arena, and I almost stopped in my tracks.

He’s--

“Abaddon!”

I looked up at my house's watchbox, and saw madam Karine hanging over the railing, looking at me with an all-knowing gaze. “If you off yourself here, I’ll cut off your d**k and feed it to the wolves!” She threatened, and I heard the other warriors chuckle as I saluted her. “Yes, Madam Karine!” I shouted, my mind focusing on the task at hand.

Running, running, running.

Has it ever occurred to anyone anything world-shattering whilst running? I tend to have my best thoughts while running; They’re usually absolutely insane, but still amazing thoughts nonetheless. Maybe I should run more often, so I can have better thoughts. But, then again, if I ran more often I wouldn’t train with Madam Karine as often, and then I would certainly never have been brought here--

No. Stop getting distracted.

I can focus on everything else later. I need to focus on one thing-- okay, two things; running and the other warriors who were pushing and shoving each other to the ground to get them disqualified. Apparently, because falling makes you stop, it’s classified as your run being over. And who knew? Everyone but me! Why am I the last to know?! It’s just rude, at this point! I should be allowed to skip a trial because of my lack of information!

Okay. Calm down Abby.

I can focus on all of that later; at this moment, and until this trial is finished, I would do what Merid deems I do best: run.

And run, I did.