Academy

Chapter Five : Slow Life

‘Why are they shaking their heads?

We're stuck in slow life

Is it the beating of the chest?

That makes us fear the rest

We're slowly sailing away

Behind closed eyes’

Of Monsters and Men, Slow Life

The festival was a plethora of lanterns and fairy lights strung throughout the trees. The wafting smell of food - noddles and curries and hotdogs and burgers - oh and icecream - People were laughing and - and that over there was Professor Blaise Axyl talking to a mixture of students and teachers. He was incredible, only five years a graduate he'd already worked for the Queen, travelled the continent and amassed an incredibly broad range of skill with different weaponry. Which was exactly how he'd gotten the job as one of Ashbourne's Specialty Weaponry Professors at such a young age.

Pan wondered on, wideeyed and gaping her head rolling as she tried to absorb the colour and life. She hadn't bothered to change after dragging all her stuff into the only empty bedroom left in the Jupiter Squad dorm. Now she was wishing she'd bothered. Her jacket with its stretched sleeves and faded patches, her scuffed sneakers and ripped jeans, none of it was pretty enough for this festival.

There was a skirt, somewhere amongst all her things, and maybe a blouse somewhere without a stain on it. she should have changed. Everyone else looked nice and she looked… well she'd looked like a wreck who'd just moved away from home. She wished she'd at least bothered to brush out her shoulder length hair. Fine as it may be there was so much of it that it was a constant tangle.

A wave of insecurity made her stomach coil.

She looked around frantically, desperate for that one familiar face, desperate to find her sister. Bella had promised to meet her here, she must be looking for her.

"Whoa hey! You're Pandora Read," A grinning face landed in her field of vision. "I'm a first year too," the girl was half a head taller than Pan, with broader shoulders and more curves. There was a gathering at her back that had all turned to stare. And they all started to whisper.

Pan stumbled back a step, her heart leaping and a nervous thrum beating under her skin. "Oh, uh, I, uh…" she was whimpering. There were so many people. Why were they all staring. Where was Bella? "I have to go," she snapped, turning on her heel and shoving through the crowd.

"What's wrong with her?" someone grumbled.

Pan started to run, shoving her way through people, blinded by all the lights. Her senses overwhelmed. There were too many people. She began to pant and stumbled to a halt, lost somewhere amongst the stalls and stands, there was someone playing the piano not far away and it would have been beautiful music if it weren't beating against her skull like a hammer.

Where was Bella?

She'd never been so surrounded, so closely watched and talked about before. Ashbourne's student body was barely smaller than the population of the village her family lived near. It was three times the size of her Primary school. And only three other students in her grade at Primary had gone on to Guardian Academies, only one of them to Ashbourne.

Why were they all staring at her?

"Over here," someone murmured gently and a tall, lanky figure brushed past her, nodding toward the trees not too far away.

Pan stumbled after him, her ears ringing, head spinning. Where the hell was her sister? Her scuffed sneakers dragged in the dirt, her hands were shaking where she tugged on the sleeves of her sweater.

The boy who lead her away from the fray, it took her a long moment to realise, was someone she recognised. Not personally of course but from his picture. It was Rowan Camden. Tall, kind of thin, with dark brown, almost black shaggy hair and a sharp jawline. "You alright?" he asked her quietly when they stood between two maple trees watching the crowd enjoy the festival.

Pan nodded numbly, "I'm sorry," she squeaked.

He shrugged, his thin lips pulling up in a quirky smile. "I get it, the Festival can be… overwhelming."

Her shoulders relaxed slightly. He got it, he didn't think she was crazy weird. "Yeah," she muttered, chewing the inside of her cheek as she searched the flowing crowd. "There are just so many people - and they were all looking at me."

Rowan smiled bitterly, she had to crane her neck to look up at him. "Get used to it," he grumbled, leaning his shoulder against a tree and crossing his arms over his chest. "It'll be a long year."

She frowned, shifting her feet and kicking up some dirt, her fingers toyed with a loose thread in her sleeve. "I suppose. They'll soon realise that I don't belong here and… well.."

Rowan scoffed a laugh. "You don't belong?" he asked. "Why's that?"

She shrugged sadly. "I dunno, I just think this was all some big mistake. I'm only a first year - I can't be in Raven Elex's squad." It was starting to smell like rain, if it weren't for the dark sky and the bright lanterns Pan was certain she'd see dark clouds rolling in. She was certain Rowan, who was staring up at the sky and not at the party, was thinking so too.

He was eerily quiet for an uncomfortably long time. Normally she'd start running her mouth, babbling about anything and everything to fill the void, but… well there was something about the easy comfort of his silence that made her hold her tongue. His eyes were electric blue, a striking pattern of colour that zeroed in wherever he looked. Some energy under her skin began to tingle as she watched him scan the sky, a zapping that trickled off her skin. She wasn't sure what it was and she definitely didn't mean to do it, but she flinched and curled her shoulders in when he startled and looked at her. His eyes took in her body, the hunched shoulders and hands hidden beneath her sleeves, the way her knee was bouncing because she couldn’t stand still. They landed on her eyes and held. A solid, heavy gaze that left the air between them crackling with Spirit energy that she wasn't entirely certain wasn't her own.

"Do you…" He began slowly, swallowing heavily, his eyes never once leaving hers. "What's your Spirit?" he asked.

She gave a jerky shake of her head, "I don't know," she whispered, "I haven't found it yet."

His lips pressed into a thin line, his head tilted and that messy hair swung. He blinked, once, twice, before he nodded and looked back up to the sky.

Her gut was all twisted up in knots, her one wobbly knee refused to stop bouncing, but she forced herself to look up with him into the big, dark sky. What did he see up there? She watched silently, watched as two people stopped in front of them -

"A whole team of third years?" gasped the first, a stocky boy, "You're so lucky."

"I know right!" The girl in front of him was tall and lean and well developed. "This is my year, I can feel it."

A little further into the crowd a different boy was playing with fire. Pulled from a lantern and crackling like a firework far above his head. His friends all laughed and gawked.

A then water appeared out of nowhere and killed the firework, collapsing on the boy as if someone had up ended a bucket.

A bigger kid, maybe a fourth or fifth year, laugh and pointed and his friends all joined him.

Pan frowned and wrung out her hands anxiously.

Kid - not an entirely accurate term for students of guardian Academies. At fifteen Pan was a first year, and she had six years of training ahead of her. The oldest students were twenty one - definitely not kids anymore.

But Pan still felt like a child. She was too small, too weak, too inexperienced beside these Guardians in training. Beside Rowan Camden.

And yet, they all acted like children tonight.

Maybe because the Guardian Academies were the only courses to start at fifteen. Everyone else complete Primary Education until the age of eighteen. Even Healers.

Becoming a Guardian was different though. It wasn't a career, it was a lifestyle. In theory, by the age of fifteen a person's Spirit should have Manifested into its unique form, that was why Guardians began at that age. To mould and shape your Spirit from its early days, to be a tolerance for a specific use, like shielding and to direct it as a weapon and so on.

Pan's fear was that she wouldn't be accepted to the Academy because her Spirit hadn't yet manifested. It was common but it also wasn’t freakish. Her sister on the other hand had known her Spirit Manifestation since she was ten. She had water affinity, a specific kind that meant Bella could summon and create and control massive volumes of water, she also possessed the rare ability to use water for healing and cleansing, only small things but it was an invaluable skill none the less.

But Pan wasn't sure what her Spirit did. Sometimes she thought she might be completely useless, but there was an energy that constantly bubbled inside of her. When they attached a weird machine to her to measure the strength of her Spirit she was off the charts. But she had no idea how to use it, how to shape it into to anything of call upon it. Sometimes, when she was cold in the winter, she'd scoot closer to fireplace in their living room and the fire would grow in response, sometimes it would even start to burn white at its centre. When she'd mentioned it to her dad he'd told her it wasn't likely that her manifestation was in flame. And she'd gotten no further explanation. Sometimes the lights would flicker when she was angry, but she'd gotten the same response from her parents. One time she'd been at school and had stared so hard at the clock on the wall that it had stopped. And, if only for a second or two, everyone around her had been frozen. Bella told her she dreamed that one.

Mostly though, when it came to her Spirit, all Pan knew was that it glowed. When she could feel that bubbling, crackling essence expand until her skin was too tight she'd noticed glowing. Sometimes her eyes, or her hair or her hands or her whole body. Sometimes it was something she was looking at or holding. That was how she'd picked her weapon before starting at the Academy.

Unlike Bella, who went all the way to the market in Eshyea with their dad to find her weapon, Pan hadn't been allowed to go shopping for hers. Instead, her uncle had come to visit and brought a rather impressive collection of weapons for her to try out. She'd picked up a tabar, a battle axe like her uncle's. But this particular tabar had a switch and a button, she later learned that the button withdrew and released the axe blade and the switch short and elongated the slender handle. It could be a baton or a staff or an axe.

When she'd picked up the tabar it had glowed and shuddered in her hand. The whole sending vibrations throughout her body, tingles she felt zapping across her skin even hours later.

And that was that, her uncle declared, she'd found her weapon.

When she'd asked if the glowing happened to everyone the conversation had been abruptly sidestepped and she'd never gotten an answer from the adults. Bella later confessed that hers hadn't glowed, she'd chosen her sabre because it felt right in her hand.

If it was her Spirit it was lame but at least she'd qualified for the Academy.

And she had six years to figure out and train her Spirit - and the rest of her. Looking around it was easy to determine the first years, they were generally smaller, with less muscle and less coordination. They moved with less swagger, spoke with less confidence. And, like Pan herself, they were all pointing and whispering about the big names at Ashbourne Academy.

"Oh my gods," She breathed, her jaw dropping. Rowan shot her a questioning glanced but Pan was staring at the festival, bouncing from foot to foot on her toes. "That- that's Raven Elex," she half squealed, pointing through the crowd.

Rowan followed the gesture until the full intensity of his electric blue eyes was pinned on Raven Elex. She wore a dark hooded sweatshirt, the hood pulled all the way over her head, only her pale chin and small pink mouth were visible beneath it's shadow. Her blue black hair was pin straight and hanging in a curtain down her chest, her hands lost beneath the sleeves of her hoodie, her laced-up combat boots didn't even seem to be touching the ground which darkened as she passed over.

"She's so shadowy," Pan whispered, tilting her head. Her hair swung into her eyes and she swiped with clammy hands and sputtered through a mouthful of the stuff but Rowan didn't seem to notice. He was still staring at Raven Elex as if the rest of the world had disappeared. But Pan's attention had already been snagged by the musical laugh floating from a head of golden blonde hair. "That's Gabriella Jaro!" She cried, forgetting where she was, who she was with, she grasped Rowan's sleeve and tugged it excitedly. "And Connor Daryen and- Rowan!" She cried jumping up and down. Finally he looked away from Raven Elex, only so he could scowl at the hand she gripped him with. "That's them," She breathed, rapidly releasing his sleeve and gesturing wildly at the four people amongst the stalls that the crowd was actually parting for. "That's our Squad - I can't believe it, that's my Squad… that's my Squad."

Rowan smiled slightly - he probably thought she was insane but Pan was so awestruck she didn't possess the awareness to care.

She had to bite her lip to keep her grin from taking over her face. Excitement had burned away all her fear. "Should we, like, go say hello?" She asked, glancing up at him with saucer sized eyes.

He shrugged irreverently and turned his gaze back to the shadow weaving through the crowd, Raven Elex. "You can do what you like," he grunted.

She frowned, trying not to let the fear seep back in. "I can't go alone," she moaned, tugging on her cuffs again. "Don't you want to meet them? We have to meet them at some point right - I mean we're on a Squad together, we'll be stuck together all year - what if they think we're avoiding them and then they hate us - oh! What if they hate me? I'm just a first year, I don't know anything, they're going to hate me - I'll never be able to show my face and-"

"They're looking this way," Rowan grunted.

She squeaked and ducked behind him. "They hate me," she hissed.

Rowan rolled his eyes, and angled his body. Sure enough Pan could see Maximus Marcomb, beneath a mop of shaggy black hair, pointing in their direction. Gabriella Jaro smiled brilliantly, it took over her whole face, and she waved a golden tanned hand at them.

"Wave back," Pan whimpered, shoving his arm lightly. "Before they think we're ignoring them."

"You wave back," Rowan grunted, crossing his arms tightly over his chest, making his body shoulders jut out.

"Hi there!"

Pan squeaked, her sleeve covered hands shot to her face.

"Sorry," Gabriella Jaro kept on smiling but her dark blonde brows furrowed slightly. "Didn't mean to frighten you."

"Pandora Read," Maximus Marcomb smiled with his whole face, faint dimples flashing while dark eyes glinted with mischief. "You're adorable."

Pan flushed.

They were tall, all of them, so very, very tall.

Rowan was the tallest, it was definitely a strain on her neck, but they were all too tall. She felt like a three year old, all of them grinning down at her like that. Next thing she knew they'd be kneeling to speak to her eye to eye.

"Don't call her adorable," Gabriella Jaro snapped, "It's condescending."

Pan shrunk a little further back.

"You're scaring her," Connor Daryen chuckled, a big block of a guy with his muscly arms crossed over his chest.

"Sorry!" Maximus Marcomb laughed, elbowing his way in front of the other two.

Where had Raven Elex gone?

Rowan probably thought she was a wuss, half hiding behind him the way she was. But he was still staring out the crowd, likely at Raven Elex wherever she hid.

"So," Maximus Marcomb began, "Pandora Read-"

"Pan," she squeaked, "Call me Pan."

He only grinned more broadly, "Nice, I like that. Well Pan, I'm Max, I'll be your new best friend. I'll be the go to guy for whatever you need, whenever-"

"You sound like a drug dealer," Connor Daryen scoffed, "What'd you work on the black market or something."

Max winked devilishly at her, "Something like that," he joked.

Pan smiled tentatively. They were nice, funny even. How long would that last when they realised how useless she was?

"I'm Gabby," Gabriella Jaro tossed her flawless golden hair over her shoulder with a flourish that Pan had only ever seen accomplished in movies. "This is Connor and," she twisted to gesture behind herself, "That's Raven."

Pan gave a jerky wave, her elbow tucked in tight to her side. "H-hi," she whispered, "It's nice to meet you all."

"Yeah for sure - team bonding time - glad you found Rowan for us," Max stepped up beside Pan and spun to face Gabby, slinging his arm around Pan's shoulders. "I was beginning to worry we'd never find him."

Pan blushed furiously.

"Max," Gabby warned, "Personal space."

"It's fine," Pan whispered, shoving her hair back from her face with a clammy hand.

With Max out of the way Pan could see Raven Elex now. Her hands stuffed in the pockets of her sweater, beneath the hood Raven's head was tilted and her lips were pressed into a thin line. Pan tried not to take it personally.

"Well," Max went on with a grandeur that Pan assumed was a permanent fixture. "Now that the team's all together, what should we do?"

Her heart was racing, she was blushing so furiously she was beginning to sweat. Could Max tell, with his arm around her, standing so close - he could definitely tell.

"Max," Gabby said quietly, flashing him a look that Pan didn't understand.

Whatever it meant, Max dropped his arm and stepped away, air rushed in around her. Pan glanced back at Rowan but he was still staring at Raven Elex. How was it possible that the only person here she felt almost kind of comfortable around was the only person who wasn't currently staring at her. He'd saved her from the crowd before, why wasn't he saving her now?

Her knee was bouncing, bouncing, bouncing with a vigour that made her whole body shake. They were still staring - were they waiting for her? Should she say something? Where was Bella - Bella was really good with people, people liked Bella she was nice and funny and could maintain eye contact with people who were trying to talk to her, she could keep up with a conversation - where was Bella?

Gabby cleared her throat. "Pan," She said softly, "If you'd like to be alone…" she offered, her head tilted ever so slightly.

She was looking at Pan as if she were a child - some frightened toddler.

Pan grimaced. "No, I'm sorry - I don't mean to be rude, I just… have you seen my sister at all? Her name's Bella, she's got brown hair and brown eyes and-"

"Yes," Max grinned, "We met the gorgeous Belladonna - damn kid-"

"Max," Gabby warned.

Pan flushed.

"We ran into her a little over an hour ago," Connor offered, "She was off to join up with her team."

Pan fumbled, grasping at the blunt ends of her hair, sitting on her collarbone. Her team, Bella had gone to find her team. But she promised… I'll see you at the festival tonight - that's what she'd promised.

Was she still upset? It was a fluke really… and Bella had gotten Landon Emerton this year, she couldn't really be upset that Pan had accidentally - through absolutely no fault of her own - been teamed up with Raven Elex. Was she upset? Like really upset. Bella had never really been upset with her before.

There was that time that Pan stole Bella's favourite training pants and ruined them in the forest and Bella had been so mad she'd locked her out of the house until their mother returned that evening. Or the time she'd accidentally broken the engraved crystal decanter Bella had picked out for their dad's birthday and Bella had screamed at her until she was blue in the face. But those sorts of things blew over easily. They were material. Bella was never really upset with Pan.

"Why don't we wander the festival," Gabby offered gently, "We'll find her somewhere."

Pan glanced at Rowan again and he finally, finally, dragged his gaze away from Raven Elex. He shrugged at her. So Pan shrugged at Gabby.

"Fantastic," Max chirped, taking a big bouncy step toward the crowded festival. "Team bonding time!" Raven cleared her throat. "Acquainting sorry - Team acquainting time." he looked back over his shoulder to wink at them all.

Pan watched him go. Connor following after him and gently dragging Gabby with a hand on her waist. Rowan pushed off of his tree. But Pan paused, Raven Elex was staring - or she was still facing her, Pan had no idea where her eyes were under that hood so maybe she wasn't staring. But she hadn't moved. Not an inch.

Pan stuttered, "Uh… um… hi…"

"Hello," Raven Elex murmured, her voice low and wispy, like it was floating on those faint shadows that leapt off her skin in tendrils that faded into the lantern lit night.

Rowan had walked away.

It was just the two of them.

And there was something strange about Raven Elex. Something off. Like the world around them was awake and alive, buzzing with energy and movement. But Raven Elex was not. Nothing buzzed, nothing crackled, nothing sizzled or pulsed or rolled. There was nothing. And it felt vast.

And when she spoke a shiver rolled down Pan's spine. "You," She murmured, taking a slight step toward Pan. "Are different."

Pan flinched, if it were possible her shoulders would have drawn even further in, as it was they were already at her ears. Different? Was that good or bad?

Raven Elex tilted her head, her dark hair shifted and the light caught up an inch or so beneath her hood. Pale skin, round cheekbones, her eye - the one Pan could see beneath the hood and shadows - it was slanted, narrow, and dark. Black eyes, Pan had never seen properly black eyes before. "I'm Raven," She said in a voice that was like a purr.

Pan squeaked, "I know."

The corner of her mouth tugged upward wryly. "What did Abrahim talk to you about?"

Pan had to look away, she clasped her hands in front of her, wringing her fingers anxiously. "He - he just - he wanted to tell me… I guess to make sure… I don't know actually - I have no idea what he wanted…" she frowned at the ground, a heavy weight settling in her gut. She'd spent an hour on that transport with the Headmaster and essentially learned nothing. Absolutely nothing.

But Raven Elex only smiled - or her lips drew up in a movement that would have been a smile if her mouth wasn't still pressed into a tight line. "He's like that," she explained quietly. "He says a lot without ever really saying anything at all."

And with that the infamous Raven Elex turned and followed after their teammates.