Pretty Face, Black Soul
1738 Words
I jerked to a halt as time seemed to grind to a stop around me. Marcella's non-stop rambling felt so distant as though I had drifted out of my own body. I stood outside my frozen body and I observed Salvatore with keen eyes.
His cold yet charming gray eyes scanned me from head to toe. It wasn't the affectionate look a bride gets from her husband, it was something other than that. It was that proud look of accomplishment when you not only marry one of the prettiest girls in Chicago, but you own her now.
Good gracious, he was tall. The men beside him were both over six feet but he made them look so small. The only one who came close was his brother, Cesare. The two brothers had a striking resemblance; Same black soot hair but his eyes held more warmth. I don't care if the same black blood runs through their veins, but I'd have appreciated Father if he had gotten Cesare for a son-in-law.
“ It seems as though the bride is in a trance. Can someone please bring her back?”
I coughed embarrassingly when Marcella tugged at my gown, in a frantic attempt to bring me back to my senses. I was back in my body and my cheeks blazed with heat at Salvatore's scrutiny. Since the moment they had stepped foot in here, he had not taken his eyes off me.
“ Where went you?” Marcella inquired with bugging eyes, as I stared around at my environs like I had not an idea of what was going on.
“ What do you mean? I was here the whole time.” I liked curtly as I avoided Salvatore's gaze. He was making me nervous with just his eyes. How nervous would I be when we are left alone in his room?
Marcella did not seem to believe me, but she shrugged it off anyways. “ Salvatore was introducing his friends..” I was going to butt in and quickly apologize for my absence, but he beat me to it. “ And you are?”
His low voice sent shivers up my spine.
“ Marcella. Marcella Bianchi. I'm Alessia's cousin, bestie and favorite person in the world. Although I'm year older than her, we click so well..”
I died of boredom. She was going to embarrass me more if that loose mouth of hers doesn't stop babbling about things that never happened. I had been looking at everywhere else but his face and when I eventually braced myself up to do so, I was greeted with a warm smile instead of fury.
Salvatore? Warmth? Smile? It's either he's not the same man the people in this hall have been gossiping about, or he's putting up a facade.
“ You're an interesting one, Marcella, and while I'd love to stay and chat more with you about my bride, it's time we start the ceremony.”
~~~
Marrying me off in such an obscure manner without throwing a proper engagement party first made me sense something was definitely wrong. Everything about the people was off too. The fake smiles when they see me look their way and the remorseful stare they throw at me when they think I ain't watching them.
Engagement parties were usually held in the bride's home. The wedding ceremonies comes three months after, and it's usually done at the groom's.
“ This is Salvatore's way of making up for the engagement party. He asked that the wedding be conducted here in Chicago. Isn't he a sweetheart?”
Aunt Lucretia flashed me her signature toothless smile. She was one of the oldest in our lineage, and the only one who understand how it felt to be trapped in a world as ours without your consent.
I forced a smile and nodded in agreement. “ Yes, he is.”
Aunt Lucretia had known me all my life, she wasn't going to buy that. She adjusted my veil and drew me in for a hug when I sighed and let my head fall. I was trying so hard to hold back. I was trying too hard to not be the weaker vessel I was.
“ You don't have to hide it from me, Alessia. I can see right through you. Francesca told me you how much you hated her now. Dont. We both will love to help you out of this misery, but we can't. Not that we won't, we can't.”
Francesca was my mother.
I held on tight. Who knows when next I get to hold her like this?
Once that first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. Tears ran in rivulets and flowed faster than my heartbeat. I was grateful the guest hadn't noticed the bride bawling her eyes out.
I couldn't see her face, but I knew I broke her heart the moment I went loose. All she did was embrace me and let the torrent of my tears soak through her dress. My lungs rummaged for oxygen, and my sobbing no doubt had the same force of someone drowning. My cheeks burned, and my mind kept replaying Gracie's last moments on Earth.
“ Let it all out. The moment you say your vows, you have lost the right to cry or even feel pain. Except in your closet.”
That was exactly what I did. I let it all out, all my pent-up emotions and the tears I had stopped from running.
No f*****g way! I forgot I was actually the bride and now the tons of makeup powder I had on have been ruined.
“ You've ruined your makeup, Alessia,” I stood still as she dabbed my wet eyes and cheeks. “ Such a fine bride. Come, let's fix your makeup. Your father and Salvatore are having a meeting. I guess the guests arrived too early.”
Aunt Lucretia took me to the guest room she was given and helped redo my makeup. There were a few packed boxes on her bed, and my eyes sometimes wandered there. I was curious to know what were behind those colorfully wrappers.
“ They are yours. I got them for you. Since we couldn't do a proper engagement party or bridal shower, I decided to get em' for you.”
I for one was so elated that I didn't get to witness a bridal shower. There was nothing to see except a bunch of grown women handing cringe gifts to. Lingeries were the most gifted items at a bridal shower. Knowing the kind of person I was surrounded by, those type of items would definitely be topping the charts.
“ Don't give me that face, I didn't buy no lingeries or lacy panties. It's something unusual. I want you to unwrap it when Salvatore isn't home. Open it when you're alone and promise me, you will forgive your parents after it.”
Although it made me more curious, I nodded. “ Will do so. Thank you, Aunt.”
Lucretia's worried gaze followed my every move. I was fidgeting. She was done with my makeup and Father had sent someone to get us. It was time.
“ I wished we all got married for love. I wish you didn't have to look so sad on your wedding day,” she smoothed my dress and smiled. “ But, this is for the best. Shall we?”
Mother barged in cursing under her breath. She looked like she had ran all the way here. “ Alessia, you are keeping them waiting. Do you need help with the lace garter?”
I slightly raised my gown up my upper thigh to reveal the white lace garter my husband would have to take off with his mouth and throw it into the group of gathered, hungry bachelors. “ I already put it on. Let's go now.”
Lucretia handed me the flower bouquet, the roses were pretty but that was the least on my mind.
We walked in eerie silence through the empty house, my heels clacking on the marble floors. My heart was pounding in my chest as we stepped through the glass sliding door onto the veranda overlooking the backyard and the beach. The front of the garden was occupied by the huge white pavilion where the wedding ceremony would be held. But behind the pavilion dozens of tables had been set up for the feast later at night. Voices carried over to me from inside the pavilion where the guests were waiting for my arrival. A path of red rose petals led from the veranda toward the entrance of the pavilion. I followed mother into the small room between the outside and the main part of the pavilion. Father was waiting and straightened when we entered. Mother stared briefly at him, then at me. I could tell her heart was aching, but she successfully hid it on first attempt. She had become so good at that, that we had a rough time trying to figure out how she genuinely felt each time.
*******
Father walked me down the aisle. My veil was already brought down by him and he muttered a few words. “ In anything you do, don't get on his bad sides, Alessia. And whenever you feel the need to breathe outside his walls, you can always visit. A year isn't that long to survive. You'll be free anyways..”
Yeah, whenever I need some air outside his walls, I should run back home - like I ever considered this place home. It was a cage, a golden cage and nothing else.
“ What do you mean? A year? What's going to happen after a year?”
But oh, he ignored my questions and led me on anyway whilst the slow music begun to play. On the other end stood my husband who hasn't taken his eyes off me for a second. How could one be so beautiful yet ugly? How could you have a pretty face yet an a black soul? But I act like I do not know why. Aren't all made men the same? Is my father any different from him?
“ You look like you are about to pass out.”
Oh s**t, my veil was off now and the only armour I had on has been removed. The world could clearly see how distraught I was now.
- Writer
