Stardust & Scars

CHAPTER 1: Audition

The rain had been falling since six in the morning.

By eight, the sidewalk outside the building was already crowded.

Girls with dance bags.

Girls with carefully curled hair.

Girls practicing lyrics under their breath.

Girls staring at their phones, pretending they weren't nervous.

And then there was me.

Standing underneath a broken tarp, holding a folder that had already started to get wet.

I looked down at my shoes.

Cheap white sneakers.

One of them had a tiny tear near the sole.

Perfect.

Exactly how I wanted to start my idol career.

"Grabe."

I looked up.

A girl beside me was staring at the line ahead.

She had her hair tied into a messy ponytail and was wearing an oversized black hoodie. A pair of headphones hung around her neck.

"Ang haba," she muttered.

I laughed quietly.

"Oo nga."

She looked at me.

Then at my folder.

Then back at me.

"First time?"

I nodded.

"Ikaw?"

"First time din."

She smiled.

"Good luck sa'tin."

"You too."

She turned back toward the entrance.

That was it.

Our first conversation.

No dramatic music.

No slow motion.

No idea that four years later, I'd remember exactly what she was wearing.

Her name was Mika.

At the time, I didn't know that.

I didn't know anything about her.

I didn't know that she could dance for six hours without complaining.

I didn't know she hated being called cute.

I didn't know she cried when she was angry.

And I definitely didn't know that one day, she'd be standing beside me on the biggest stage we'd ever seen.

I only knew that she looked nervous.

Just like me.

"Next!"

The security guard shouted from the entrance.

The line moved.

Mika took a step forward.

I followed.

Then someone suddenly bumped into me from behind.

"Sorry!"

I turned.

A girl was struggling to keep her papers from falling into a puddle.

"Oh—wait."

I crouched down and helped her pick them up.

"Salamat."

"No problem."

She took the papers from me.

I noticed the tiny handwritten lyrics on one of them.

Her handwriting was neat.

Almost annoyingly neat.

"You wrote that?"

She looked embarrassed.

"Oo."

"Original?"

She nodded.

"Song?"

"Parang... lyrics lang."

I smiled.

"Ang ganda."

She stared at me like she wasn't expecting the compliment.

"Talaga?"

"Oo naman."

She smiled.

"Thanks."

Her name was Sienna.

I would learn that later.

And then there was the fourth girl.

Luna.

She wasn't standing near us.

She was several people ahead, under the building's awning.

Unlike everyone else, she wasn't talking.

Wasn't checking her phone.

Wasn't practicing.

She was just standing there.

Watching.

I couldn't tell what she was looking at.

Then, for a brief second, her eyes met mine.

She smiled.

Not a big smile.

Just enough.

Then she looked away.

I didn't know why, but I remembered her face.

Maybe because she didn't look nervous.

She looked like she already knew she belonged there.

---

By eleven in the morning, I was still waiting.

My stomach had started making embarrassing noises.

Mika heard it.

She looked at me.

I looked at her.

She raised an eyebrow.

"Nagugutom ka?"

"Konti."

"Konti?"

"Okay, sobra."

She laughed.

"May biscuit ako."

She pulled a crushed pack of crackers from her bag.

I stared at it.

"Yan na breakfast mo?"

"Ba't?"

"Ang lungkot."

"Libre naman."

I laughed.

"Fair."

She handed me half.

"Share tayo."

"Salamat."

Sienna sat down beside us.

"May tubig kayo?"

Mika handed her a bottle.

"Ikaw, wala?"

"Nakalimutan ko."

"Grabe kayong mga future idol."

She laughed.

"Di pa nga sure kung papasa."

Mika shrugged.

"Eh di kung bumagsak, audition ulit."

I looked at her.

"Ganun lang?"

"Oo."

"Ang dali sabihin."

"Eh ano gusto mo? Umiyak tayo dito?"

Sienna laughed.

"Pwede rin."

Mika pointed at her.

"Ikaw na umiyak. Ako kakain."

For the first time that morning, the three of us laughed together.

A few people looked at us.

We didn't care.

At that moment, we were just three strangers trying not to panic.

Then the door opened.

"Next ten!"

Everyone stood.

My heart immediately started pounding.

Mika grabbed my arm.

"Uy."

"Hm?"

"Kapag pumasa tayo..."

She paused.

I looked at her.

"Oo?"

"Magiging friends tayo?"

I laughed.

"Akala ko ba hindi ka emotional?"

"Hoy, seryoso ako."

Sienna stood up beside us.

"Pwede bang apat?"

We looked at her.

"Four?"

She pointed toward the girl standing a few meters away.

Luna.

She was alone again.

Mika waved.

"Hoy!"

Luna looked over.

"Ikaw! Halika dito!"

Luna pointed at herself.

"Ako?"

"Oo!"

She hesitated before walking toward us.

When she reached us, Mika smiled.

"Friends tayo."

Luna blinked.

"Ha?"

"Pag pumasa tayong lahat."

Sienna smiled.

"Deal?"

Luna looked at the three of us.

Then she laughed.

"Deal."

And that was how it started.

Not with fame.

Not with applause.

Not with a contract.

Just four girls standing in a hallway, sharing crackers and making a promise none of us understood the weight of.

---

The audition room smelled like old air-conditioning and floor wax.

One by one, girls walked inside.

Some came out crying.

Some came out smiling.

Some didn't come out at all.

Then—

"Aira Valdez."

My heart stopped.

"Ikaw na."

Mika squeezed my hand.

"Good luck."

Sienna smiled.

"Kayang-kaya mo."

Luna simply nodded.

"Go."

I took a deep breath.

Then I walked inside.

There were three judges.

One woman.

Two men.

A camera in the corner.

A microphone in front of me.

The woman looked at my form.

"Name?"

"Aira."

"Full name?"

"Aira Valdez po."

"Age?"

"Nineteen po."

She looked at me.

"Experience?"

I swallowed.

"Wala po."

The two men exchanged glances.

"Professional training?"

"Wala rin po."

"Connections in the industry?"

I hesitated.

Then shook my head.

"Wala po."

The woman leaned back.

"Then why are you here?"

My fingers tightened around the microphone.

I thought about the months I had spent practicing alone in our living room.

About my mother telling me to find a stable job.

About my father asking if I was really serious about this.

About every person who told me it was impossible.

I looked straight at the judges.

"Para po maging idol."

Silence.

One of the men smiled faintly.

"Maraming gustong maging idol."

I nodded.

"Opo."

"At bakit ikaw?"

My heart was pounding so hard I could hear it.

I didn't have a perfect answer.

So I gave them the only honest one I had.

"Siguro po... wala akong magandang dahilan."

The judges looked confused.

I continued.

"Pero gusto ko po talaga."

My voice shook.

"At kung kailangan kong magsimula sa wala, okay lang po."

I took a breath.

"Ang importante, magsimula ako."

For a moment, nobody spoke.

Then the woman pointed toward the center of the room.

"Music."

The first note played.

And I sang.

---

When I walked out, the hallway felt different.

Mika immediately stood.

"Uy!"

I shook my head.

"Di ko alam."

"Anong di mo alam?"

"Kung pasado."

She stared at me.

"Anong mukha ng judge?"

"Normal."

"Normal?"

"Oo."

"May ngiti?"

"Konti."

"May sinabi?"

"Salamat."

Mika groaned.

"Patay."

Sienna laughed.

"Malay mo naman."

Then someone called another name.

"Luna Reyes."

Luna looked at us.

"Good luck."

Mika smiled.

"Go! Wasakin mo sila."

Luna laughed.

"OA."

She entered the room.

The door closed.

We waited.

Five minutes.

Ten.

Fifteen.

"Tagal," Sienna whispered.

Mika crossed her arms.

"Baka pinapapirma na."

"Ulol."

"Malay mo."

Twenty minutes.

The door finally opened.

Luna stepped out.

She wasn't smiling.

Mika stood.

"Uy, kumusta?"

Luna looked at us.

Then she said something none of us expected.

"Pinapunta nila ako sa second floor."

"Ha?"

"May private interview daw."

Sienna frowned.

"Ngayon?"

"Oo."

Mika looked toward the hallway.

"Ba't ikaw lang?"

Luna shrugged.

"Di ko rin alam."

She smiled.

"Balikan ko kayo."

Then she walked away.

We watched her disappear around the corner.

None of us knew why she had been called upstairs.

None of us thought much about it.

Not then.

We were too young.

Too hopeful.

Too hungry for the dream.

We didn't know that some doors weren't meant to be opened.

And we certainly didn't know that sometimes...

being chosen was the beginning of everything.

Not the end.

---

That afternoon, four names were written on a piece of paper inside the company's conference room.

AIRA VALDEZ.

MIKA SANTOS.

SIENNA CRUZ.

LUNA REYES.

Beside the four names was a single word.

SELECTED.

And underneath it, written in red ink:

KEEP THEM TOGETHER.

No one outside that room knew why.