The Period of sorrow

Chapter 1:How it all began

Julie POV

My name is Julie Bohloko,I come from a small country landlocked in South Africa named The Mountain Kingdom of Lesotho. I come from a very small village with a population of atleast 300 people and counting called Ha-Khoro in Mafeteng district. Lesotho is ruled by our King, however we are also a democratic country and so we have some other political rulers. Lesotho is a very beautiful mountainous country, and I am not saying this just because it is my country. It is indeed very beautiful.

Now that I have given a small description of my country let me continue introducing myself. I come from a family of 4 which includes, my mother, father and my little sister. I do still have other family members but since we live in a nuclear family I choose to identify as coming from a small family of 4. I just recently completed my Bachelor degree in Public administration and sociology and I'm currently unemployed as there're no jobs.

My father left is job in the year 2021, as I have already mentioned . At first the lumpsum father got from his years of labor provided for us and well life was good. I was not dependent on my parents for unni since I was sponsored, so they only one they had to massively provide for was my little sister. My father is a stubborn mosotho ex-mine worker who believed that his money had to be managed by him, which was his first era. In my opinion money should be managed by both husband and wife.

Father replaced mother's role and took care of the household from buying groceries to paying for my sister's school fees and food. Which he failed miserably. He new nothing about budgeting, groceries shopping which let to us depending on eating from the shop half the time, which let me tell you is expensive . Adding to that, father had a very big obsession with cows, which he still does, as a result he kept a herdboy eventhough he was not working anymore. More money spent. The only good thing he did was helping mother start a poultry business which at the end of the day, they both destroyed it.

Money started to be short, in the beginning I thought father was smart enough to save but how wrong was I. My little sister started having to go back to school without money for rent or food, luckily the landlord who also prepared their food was understanding . More conflicts between mother and father ensued. Mother started acting out not that I blame her. Most fights were because of money and mother's provocation and of course my dear grandmother.

Year 3 in unni, was hard, before mother and father would help me out here and there when our stipends were delayed but that stopped later since I stopped asking in hope that they would not delay my little sister's fees but boy was I wrong, still it was delayed . I big God believer so, I believe in that period of darkness God brought me a blessing in a form of my roommate. Otherwise I do not know how I would be able to buy food,pay rent, do my hair and put aside money for emergencies. With her I was able to because we shared everything, rent and food thus financially I still survived.

Remember when I said I became closed off after my grandmother's death? Well other things considered I was still okay but mentally I was slowly getting damaged. Keeping all the family, school and love problems in was killing me. I wad never one for relationships to begin with, which i blame myself completely because I could never open up. My dating life was in 9ne word horrific. My family was starting to crumble worse than ever and I has no one I thought would understand to share with.

I did have friends but we never really had heart to heart conversations well, they did share their problems with me and I did be there for them. But I could never make myself to open up, mostly I would just talk my family drama in a passive manner and they wound not take it seriously. I guess in a way I was silently crying for help but they never understood my cru for help which I do not blame them.

Studies were hard considering we had just came back from the lockdown, getting back into the 9to5 routine was not easy, adding that to the new found family problems was torture. My energy,enthusiasm and focus for studies was a hopping zero. More often than less I was daydreaming in class which showed in my 6 semester results. I did not fail thank God but my results were still not satisfactory. Group work was worse because it meant I had interact with others which became so difficult because my mind was always filled with negative thoughts.

I lost my first boyfriend because well I started being unavailable alot and most of the times I was overthinking. Started with me thinking he does not really love me, thinking he is playing me, cheating on me and all sorts of terrible things. At the time i lost him, I started feeling the need for distraction and so during my darkest day, I would post a picture of myself which I find good on social media craving for attention, which I got. It never ended well though because I'd recover and go back to my nonchalance whereby I ignore everything and everyone.

That was also the time I picked up my old habit of reading novels, truthfully they were the only things that got me out of my hole. Actually I got the inspiration to write my story from them. Truth be told, I do not know how I would have remained sane if it were not for them. Anyways, life went on, mom and dad's conflicts became severe to the point where they would ignore each other for days and well we were caught in the middle. The only one I felt heartbroken for was my little sister, who was in the years where she was supposed to be happy, reckless and carefree but well she had to grow up fast.

As months passed by money became more and more of the problem to an extend that both of my parents were swimming in debts and well to put the cherry on top, my grandmother and her daughters continued sowing discord even more. The cracks that were there at the beginning, started to become deeper and deeper.

Hello,beautiful people, I hope you are fresh and active. Writing this is starting to me more and more therapeutic so I hope you like it so far.#vote#

Love

Prexy.