The Light to My Darkness

24

I sighed and walked back into the hall. My feet tread lightly down the stairs. Writing always made me feel better. Maybe I could take another stab at the second book of my series. I grabbed my laptop off my desk and wandered into the kitchen. A late night snack couldn't hurt either. I switched on my computer, picked up a banana out of the basket on the counter, and sat down in one of the stools.

The light from the computer screen gave the kitchen an eerie glow. I stared at the first paragraph of my second book.

"My stomach was in knots. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't seem to focus in class. Every day that I saw Professor Hunter I had this pathetic hope that things would somehow be the way they were before. But it never happened. He wouldn't even look at me. It was like I didn't exist."

I took a bite of my banana and rested my chin in my hand. Every day James dressed in a pair of pants that hugged his ass perfectly and a shirt with the sleeves rolled up, revealing his strong forearms. He made his way to NYCU to teach. He had students that adored him. He was finally truly happy. And every day I wished he'd turn around and teach me a few things instead. Was I really jealous of his current students? It's not like I thought he was falling in love with some 19 year old in the back row of his class. Maybe I just missed that forbidden dynamic between us. I missed when his eyes begged me to call him Professor Hunter. When it turned him on just a little bit more. The only time I ever called him that now was when I was writing about it from the past.

"Is that how you feel?" James said from behind me.

I choked on the banana in my mouth and slammed my laptop shut. "What?" I turned around to face him.

Without the glow from the computer screen, the room was now dark. But the look in his eyes was unmistakable. It was the one that I had been missing. My eyes wandered down his abs to the V of his waist. The rest of him was hidden underneath a pair of loose sweatpants. His impressive bulge, however, was quite visible through the fabric.

He crossed his arms and walked up to the kitchen island. "Like I don't look at you?" His voice was low and seductive. "Like you don't exist?" He put one elbow down on the counter and leaned against it.

My eyes gravitated back to his. "I wrote that about those weeks after you found out my age. When I thought I lost you." I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "It was a long time ago."

"That doesn't answer my question. Come here."

I swallowed hard. "It's not how I feel. But what Dr. Nelson said bothered me, yes. How could it not? And I'm not illiterate. I see what they say in the tabloids. It's...hurtful. Ever since I stopped working everyone questions what I'm doing with my time. For a while there, it felt like everyone was on our side. And now the whole city hates me. It's like they're waiting for you to move on to the next thing. Like they can't wait for you to cast me aside for someone more interesting."

"Come. Here."

The way he said it made me press my thighs together. My eyes met his again. He looked like he wanted to f**k the negative thoughts right out of me. Like he wanted to take away my pain. I didn't have any doubt that he could.

I probably moved faster than I had in weeks. The next thing I knew, his fingers were in my hair, pulling my head back so his lips could have easy access to mine. My back was pressed against the edge of the granite countertop. And his other hand had slid beneath my silk robe and was squeezing my ass.

"Baby, I see you." His breath was hot against my skin as his lips traveled down my neck.

All I could do was moan.

He untied the string of my robe and separated the thin fabric.

My hand instinctively went to my stomach. "God, I'm huge. We don't have to do this right now. I know you can't really want me like this." I reached for the cord for my robe, but he grabbed my hand.

"You're beautiful when you're pregnant. If it was up to me, you'd be pregnant all the time."

I laughed as he easily lifted me onto the countertop. "Pregnant all the time?" I shook my head. "Remember when I didn't have any stretch marks? Remember when I could tie my own shoes?"

"I like your stretch marks." He kissed the side of my stomach. "They remind me of the gift you've given me." He kissed the other side of my stomach. "And I like tying your shoes." He dropped to his knees and kissed the inside of my ankle. He left a trail of kisses up the inside of my calf.

"James." My voice quivered. No, I didn't feel attractive. But the way he was kissing me made me feel so desired.

He gently parted my knees and continued his torturous ascent up the inside of my thigh. Suddenly I didn't care that I was seven months pregnant and felt like a whale. He took me back to when I was 19 and daring him to kiss me in his office.

"I always want you, Penny." His tongue thrust inside of me.

I fell back on my elbows. God. He made me feel so alive. I closed my eyes and let him pull me to the edge of the abyss. It was like he had awakened with a craving that only I could satisfy. That maybe he had been dreaming of having me just like this and then needed to make it a reality. This was so much f*****g better than any dream.

His lips found my c**t and he gently sucked.

In a matter of seconds, he had completely unwound me. I would have been embarrassed by how fast his tongue made me come. But we hadn't had s*x in over a week. I was pretty sure he was minutes away from exploding himself.

"f**k," he groaned and replaced this tongue with his fingers. "Another perk of being pregnant. You're crazy horny." He circled my c**t with his thumb as he stood back up.

"That's just the effect you've always had on me."