When We Return

Chapter 16

Day 7

“Sukjin?” Jay’s shoulder almost sag on the ground. His eyes narrowed while looking at me.

“Seok.. seok.” He frustratingly said prolonging the first syllable and I followed him.

“Ohh, Seokjin.” I said with a slow voice to perfect it.

Seokjin.

I finally got to know his name, and it feel just right. I can’t stop smiling, damn it. Gosh.

I said his name again and he just stared at me then. I grinned widely, absolutely happy, and I’m not trying to hide it. I want him to know.

“Are you that happy?” Is he for real? How can I not be happy? This is such a big deal for me! I didn’t know his name for almost 2 months. Can he even blame me?

I just nod in response, still smiling. My jaw started to hurt but it doesn’t matter.

He smiled too before pulling me by the neck, head locking me but it doesn’t hurt at all and made our way back to the circle.

After he pulls away and before he could join the other side with the gentlemen to sleep, I called him by his name. His real name.

Gods, I can’t get enough of it.

He turns around to face me, a meter away, “Goodnight.” I said and waved my hand.

“Goodnight, Sowon.” He said with a smile and walks away for real now.

“Geez, unnie. The both of you are so cheesy.” My attention turns to Umji when she speaks, beside her is a snickering Eunha and a grinning Yerin beside Eunha.

“What do you mean?” I ask before sitting down on the hard floor together with them.

“We know you’re a couple but why do you act as if you just confessed to each other?”

Wh.. WHAT? A.. couple?

I gag, my eyes widen so much that my eyeballs could fall off from the socket.

Is that what they think about us? A couple?

“Oh my God, no!” my voice pitched higher than I intend it to be. We all turned to Yuju sleeping beside Yerin first, afraid she might wake up. When she doesn’t stir, I quickly turn to the girls to explain.

“W-we’re not a couple, what are you talking about?” I hiss under my breath. Umji translated it to them.

The three girls just look at me, totally not convinced.

Then at the same time, they created a noise as if mocking me in a way.

“How come you’re not a couple? You’re so sweet with each other!!” Umji said in behalf of the two.

I made a reluctant glance to my back towards the guys. They’re still talking with each other when Jay—I mean Seokjin—also glanced to me.

I instantly turned away. Completely embarrassed. I could feel all the blood rushed up to my cheeks.

The girls giggled among themselves.

“We’re not a couple, okay? End of discussion.” I said with finality and crossed my arms. They still don’t believe me though.

“Why? After what he did to Yoongi when that guy looks lowly of you, you’re telling us you’re not dating?” I saw Eunha nudge Umji when she mentioned about the Yoongi incident but I just pretend I didn’t notice. I don’t want to know either.

I didn’t speak for a second. And they look at me expectantly, waiting for me to tell them what they exactly want to hear.

If only I could make up stories. Psh.

“The truth is… I don’t know.” I said finally. I heard Umji whispering to Eunha and Eunha whispered it to Yerin and Yerin’s mouth turned to an O.

I laughed, they’re so cute.

 “You don’t know?” I shrug.

“It’s.. complicated.” That’s the last thing I said before I lied down, feeling the cold tile on my back. The girls wanted to know more and contemplated whether to ask further questions or not when I closed my eyes to avoid them.

They finally gave up.

“Goodnight, girls.” Is the last thing I said before drifting away to sleep hoping to find an answer to their question after I wake up.

“Unnie..” someone pat my shoulder making me stir. Ouch, my back hurts!

I groaned and stretch while still lying on the ground. My back is killing me.

Opening my eyes, I see Yerin’s face on top of me.

“Okay?” she asks. What does she mean okay? I’m fine, I just woke up.

I just looked at her confusingly before sitting up, and immediately laid back again when I felt my head ache so bad too.

That’s when I realized my body is so weak and barely move. I wonder how I stretched my arms earlier.

I tried to sit up once again and this time, Yerin helped me.

“What happened?” I groggily asked.

“You’re sweating a lot in your sleep, unnie, and you’re stirring quite often. We thought you’re having a nightmare. We couldn’t wake you up but oppa managed to calm you down.” Umji explained. I didn’t notice she was there until she spoke.

I don’t remember having a bad dream though. Eunha touched my forehead, feeling the temperature.

“I think she still have a fever.” (Korean) she said. Umji and Yerin nodded in agreement. I spotted Yuju at the back of Yerin, she’s awake now, though she’s still very pale.

I’m glad.

“Excuse me, girls.” (Korean) we all looked up to see Seokjin hovering above us, carrying a plastic of bread loaf and a bottle of half drunken water.

The three turned their heads on me and flashed me a teasing grin. Not again.

I groaned in disbelief and they laughed altogether. Yuju is just looking at us, oblivious of what is currently happening. Poor girl.

They vacate our side, bringing Yuju with them, and based on their giggles and whispers, I guess they’re filling Yuju in.

Aish, these kids.

“Are you well now?” Seokjin sat beside me before opening the plastic of bread loaf. I don’t know what to say since I don’t even know if I’m okay so I just shrug my shoulders.

He leaned forward and placed the back of his hand on my neck. Why does it have to be on my neck? Gods!

My skin tingles at his touch, he placed it there longer and I’m itching to get his touch away from me. It’s lethal I tell you.

“Your fever is not that bad.” He announces and peeks at my face. He seems alarmed. “Why is your face so red? Are you okay?” this time, he’s touching my forehead and cheeks, feeling the temperature.

I moved away from him and hid my face on my palms. Can he stop? Argh. I can feel the girls laughing at me right now.

“I’m okay, Seokjin.” I mentally squealed after saying that. His name fits perfectly, it’s dancing at the tip of my tongue. “Stop touching my face.” I muttered under my breath.

He didn’t say anything so I risk a glance at him. He’s smiling. Why is he smiling?

“Are you now embarrassed?” he teased. This is what I’m talking about. Aish.

“Yes, because they think we’re a couple.” I confessed and automatically regretting it watching his face changed so quickly.

He’s not smiling anymore. He shrugs his shoulders and dig his hands on the plastic of bread to get a slice. “Let them assume anything. It’s not a bad thing.” He said and before I could say anything, he shoves the bread to my mouth. So, I’ve got no choice but to swallow it.

What does he even mean by that?

After we fill our stomach with food, we pass around the plastic to the others. My body is still weak and soar. But I managed to stand up and walk around. Seokjin is always trailing behind me, not that I complain, assuring that I’m okay.

Now, we’re again on our own. The others keep themselves busy too. We’re seated on the same seat we occupied the first day we’re stuck here. The cemented tiled seat.

“Tell me a story, Seokjin.” I requested. He turned to me until his body is facing mine.

“You can just call me Jin.” He said. “Seokjin is pretty hard to pronounce. Well, for you.” He teased so he earned a smack on the shoulder for that.

He cleared his throat before looking up to the dark ceiling, picking a memory to share with me.

“Once, SinB and I went to a waterpark without telling our father about it. SinB graduated from junior high and she really wanted to go there. So, after several months, we did.” He said while smiling at the memory. I listened.

“She thought it’s the perfect time to wear her two-piece suit but it was freezing cold, it’s December by the way.” He laughed, making me laugh too. My mind momentarily drifts to SinB, wondering how she’s doing right now.

“But she didn’t have much choice, she didn’t have a spare suit when we got there. So, it’s either we go back home or wear the suit and freeze to death.”

“I’m guessing she wears it and freeze.” We both laughed and he nods at the same time. SinB really is that kind of girl.

I suddenly miss her, even though our first encounter is a disaster. I still want to see her.

When we return. I thought.

After he finished, he turned to me, waiting for my turn.

“I don’t have anything to share, Jin. You know how my life revolves in school, library and office.” I said in a half-hearted laugh.

“There’s got to be something. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a happy one.” He urges me on. So, I think of something.

“When I was 13, my father brought me and my mother to a business meeting, and it happened to be held on a beach resort. Can you believe that’s the only time I ever went to a beach? The first and the last.” I smiled bitterly. I fidget with my fingers and he seem to notice it because his hand traveled to lock his fingers with mine.

I mentally thanked him for the comfort.

“Nothing really special happened that time, but I swore to myself that if ever I could untangle myself from my father’s grasp, the first place I’ll seek would be the beach.”

“And you did.” He interjected. “And with me.” I giggled at that but I totally agree.

We fell silent, waiting for the other to speak again. We just stare at each other. After we got stuck here, I think staring is a normal thing for us now. But I still feel awkward after a moment though, like now. I don’t know how we’re just staring and I’m starting to feel uncomfortable.

“Please say something.” Believe me when I say that I have to gather amount of strength to say just that.

“Eye contact is way more intimate than words will ever be.” I’m literally taken aback at what he said.

Say what?

Man, why do you have to be that sweet? I can’t take it!

I shove his face away so he is now facing the other way. He’s making my heart pitter patter. My god.

He laughed heartily. Clearly enjoying my embarrassed state.

Now that I got the hang of it, I dig in for more memories I have with my mother. Because being with her is considered a happy memory. And it’s making me miss her more. I think of her every now and then, praying she’ll be okay. Maybe she’s really worried about me knowing that I haven’t called her lately.

I still hope she doesn’t find out about my situation right now, it could kill her literally.

I talked about her, directing what I felt to my story. It goes on for a while until I glanced at Jin, his elbow is now resting in his lap with his chin leaning on his hand, watching me with a smile on his lips.

I have a great feeling he’s not listening. No, he’s definitely not listening to me! I stopped talking and he’s still watching me with a dreamy look in his eyes.

So, I slap is arm that his chin slips from his palm. “You’re not listening!” I scolded.

He straightened his posture before answering. “You keep distracting me.”

What is he talking about? I raised my eyebrows incredulously and frowned. Here I am pouring my feelings about how much I miss my mother and he thinks I’m just a distraction?

“All I’m doing is sitting here talking to you!” I said frustratingly.

His smile widens this time, “Exactly.”

Oh, gods. Something is definitely wrong with him!

And I think something is wrong with my heart too.

He’s. Making. Me. Pee. On. My. Pants.

My heart might explode any minute right now. He’s lethal, I can’t be with him right now. His words—no, actually his existence alone—will be the death of me.

“I.. I think I should go and catch up with others.” I said before standing up and rushed to the girls.

“My god, my god. Oh my god!!” I muttered after stopping beside them and sat on the floor.

“Omo, unnie! You’re blushing!” and to make it harder for me, they started to tease me.

“Shut up.” I hissed under my breath before they went laughing over my flustered face.

“I definitely stink right now.” I said before smelling myself. It’s not that bad but I can’t be comfortable knowing I’ve been using the same clothes for a couple of days now.

Others agreed with me.

Since the train raid, we had grabbed our bags and took out some clothes to change.

I think we’re really the dumbest group in history. We’ve got supply of food but it took days before we got to realize we actually have supplies. And now, we just came to think of changing clothes.

 Yeah, we’re great like that.

I dig some more on my bag to look for something useful until I found two packs of wet wipes. I quietly squealed. This is not water but I think it’s enough to clean myself.

I hid the wipes on my bag, I want it all for myself.

Sorry girls, I need to be greedy this time. I feel guilty for a moment but I shrug it off. It’s not bad to be selfish once in a while, right?

We agreed to take turns using the comfort room in the train so Yuju goes first while we wait for our turn.

I forgot what I had packed on my bag so I decided to take everything out. When I took out a hoodie, something hard but small fell from it to the ground.

I look at it to see it’s my phone.

Oh my god, I definitely forgot about my precious phone! How could you, Sowon?

I pick it up quickly to check if it still works, I screamed when it did. Earning a look from the others but I didn’t bother explaining myself to them.

I opened some files and grinning to see it’s still all there, safely secured. I clicked the gallery and there, I saw pictures of our trip together.

I smiled as I scan some pictures until I stumbled upon a picture of me with Jin. I’m making a V pose and he’s frowning.

“Oh, you found your phone.” I heard Jin behind me and I turned to show him the photo.

“Jin, look!!” I said and waving the phone to his face.

He smiled. I smiled at him.

Is it weird to say that I’ve never been so happy until this day? If it is, I don’t give a damn about it.