I urged my feet to move, for me to run after him and demand an explanation for his statement. I knew he was bluffing, he had to have been, there wasn't a body and my parents wouldn't be stupid enough to believe a note with no other evidence.
But there was a voice in the back of my head who kept telling me that if anybody would be able to pull such a thing off it would be Noah. I knew as well as the voice did that I would want to push off hearing his side of the story for as long as I could.
So, instead of bolting after him and making him tell me the truth or letting the prospect bring me to my knees as I broke apart inside, I followed my original plan and listened to his order. I was going to shower.
It only took me about 10 checks of the lock on the door to convince myself he wouldn't be able to barge in while I was showering, at least another 5 minutes studying the bruising on my face from him but I finally showered and I felt slightly better afterwards.
I had spent the entire shower planning how I was going to confront him on his little claim. The thought of it made my stomach turn but each time a spark of worry lit in me I pushed it down with the reassurance he was lying.
Here I stood, fully cleaned and dressed, facing the bedroom door. All I needed to do was reach my hand out and pull the door open but the idea of what could happen on the other end of this door was enough to make me freeze.
I inhaled and as I did yesterday before my walk, I swung the door open and marched out of it before I had time to convince myself not to. Quietly making my way downstairs, I saw no sign of Noah, the front door calling me, begging me to run through it.
Movement from the kitchen made me freeze in my tracks, I guess that answered the internal dilemma on escaping for me. "Embry, baby, come here" he sounded chirpy, a lot happier than he did when he was lying straight to my face.
Shuffling into the kitchen, I shyly stood in the corner examining the kitchen. The cabinets were a dark turquoise colour and the countertops a brown colour, the colours were very outgoing but they were nice nonetheless.
"Hey beautiful, how was your shower?" he hummed while stirring sauce in a pan. "G-good" I was trying to build up the courage to ask him about what he had said but every time I have the words on the tip of my tongue no sound comes out.
"I'm just making pasta for dinner, it's your favourite so I thought it would be nice" he looked at me occasionally expecting some sort of reaction but I was too preoccupied.
"N-noah" I whispered, cursing myself for sounding so scared, "yes little bug" he nodded, "earlier, y-you said ab-about my parents think-thinking that I had co-commited suicide" my voice trailed off at the end becoming quiet.
"I did" he countered uninterestedly, "well, wh-what did you m-mean by that?" I began fidgeting with the ring on my finger, another habit I partook in when nervous.
"I meant what I said" his tone was bored as my eyebrows scrunched in frustration. I was going to have to spell everything out for him wasn't I.
"I, well, it's n-not, not possible" I explained as nothing about his posture changed, he continued with his task as if this wasn't a big deal. "And why not?" he retorted, balling my hands in annoyance I sighed, knowing if I got aggressive I'd get no answers from him.
"T-there isn't a body and no one would b-believe, believe just a note", "who said there wasn't a body?" his nonchalant answer panicked me. He noticed my body freeze at his words and dropped the spoon in his hand walking towards me. He looked, almost, like he pitied me but that couldn't be possible because he was an emotionless wet sock.
"I, but, I, no there, I" I fumbled with my words, I couldn't think of any reply for that question. "Young girl, Embry Thompson, commits suicide, throwing herself from the Parkville Bridge into oncoming traffic on the highway, body was badly disfigured from impact, but the paramedics were able to identify the young girl by the note she had in her pocket, should I continue?"
My stomach dropped, my heart beating what felt like a million miles per minute. This couldn't be happening, I aggressively shook my head no, hoping he would stop and take back everything he said.
"I-I don't b-believe you" I stammered breathlessly as all the air in my lungs had been robbed from me. I was dizzy and gripped onto the counter for support, he did nothing but watch as I broke down.
"Come here" he gripped my upper arm, dragging me into the sitting room as he flicked the tv on.
"Embry Thompson....18.....suicide.....bridge.....note left.....funeral.....Wednesday....believe....connection to.....release.....Noah Hill."
Nothing the news reporter said was going in, I barely managed to pick up a few words but it was enough. I let myself drop on the couch as the pressure of the situation pushed against my chest. There was no one looking for me.
"But, my p-parents, th-they, no" I sobbed out, the tears flooded down my face. Noah's face held sadness, he tried to comfort me by rubbing my back but I stood and pushed him away.
"How could you, HOW COULD YOU" I was beginning to get hysteric as I shoved at his chest. "YOU HAD NO RIGHT" my hits were weak, having little to no effect on him but he didn't make any move to stop me, he just stood and took it.
I let all the feelings I had tried to lock away out as I screamed out at him. He stayed quiet just observing me, accepting all the words being thrown at him along with the physical hits.
It took no longer than 10 minutes for me to tire out, "shh, shh, it's okay now baby girl" he tightly pressed me to him, encasing his arms around me. I had no energy to struggle or try to get away from him so I let myself lean against him as I cried.
My heart hurt as I sobbed loudly, the man causing me all this pain being the only one to comfort me through it. I wasn't sure how much longer it was until my sobs died down, in its place were quiet hiccups and sniffles.
My face felt hot from the tears and my heart still hurt whenever I thought about what my parents must be going through. "How could you?" I whimpered out weakly, my body weight still supported by him.
"I know it seems bad baby, but think of it this way, it'll be a lot less trouble and heartache then them having to search for you and never finding you. Imagine the pain of never knowing if your daughter was okay, now at least they can tell themselves you're in a better place" he ran his fingers through my hair, trying to soothe my heartbroken form.
I hurled abuse at the voice in my head that claimed they could see where he was coming from and that maybe he had saved them from a greater heartache.
I was too upset to argue with him so I said nothing, I let my gaze drift towards the fireplace as I stared blankly at the bright colours dancing around.
He placed me on the couch as he returned to the kitchen, not like I was going to have an appetite now anyways. I rolled my eyes at the pressure in my bladder, how typical of me to need to go to the toilet at a moment like this. "W-where's the bathroom?" I questioned lowly, making my way to the door of the kitchen so he could hear me.
"Go down that hallway there and it's the second door on the right" he frowned at the emotionless expression on my face. Nodding I trudged towards the bathroom. Doing my business, I found entertainment in staring at my empty looking eyes.
And then I saw it, in the corner of the mirror, a window. Spinning around I made my way onto the toilet seat and tried to open the window. It budged but not very much so I kicked my leg back trying to throw my weight against it.
My body froze as my foot made contact with the soap dispenser, sending it crashing to the floor with a smash. Panic ran through my veins as I became desperate to escape, the prospect of getting lost in the woods didn't seem so terrifying anymore. Not when I knew I was the only person I could rely on to save myself.
Finally the window swung open, hoisting myself up, I flinched with every bang Noah released on the door. "Embry, I swear to god, open this door" he sounded pee'd, no scratch that, he was pee'd.
Scrunching my eyes tight I pushed myself out of the window, just as the door splintered and crashed to the ground. I brushed off the pain that shot up my legs from the impact of my body hitting the ground. Every nerve in my body was on alert as he screamed threats at me and then I did the only thing I could.
I ran.