The Great Illusion: A Story of Self-Revolution

Episode 1 The Confrontation-2

“I guess it would be getting along with each other and working with each other.”

“Yes, cooperation,” Emerald said proudly.

“That’s the word that I was looking for, but that sounds like some hippie bullshit. Like you said, the reality is that there is competition. You cannot stop that. It’s there and happens every moment. People, groups, and businesses compete with each other all the time. And with that competition, there are all the negative consequences that go with it. We have to accept that.”

“Yes, unfortunately, I have to agree with you. That is real. Nevertheless, competition is the opposite of peace and harmony, and as long as we have competition, it sounds like we will always have the consequences and problems associated with it. You are right. It would take a lot of change and work for us to overcome those patterns of belief that competition is a good thing, especially with the denial that it adds more value to a society. I strongly disagree with that. A lot of the competitions that we see are a scam. You have rigged contests and sports. You have athletes, officials and judges, and referees who are paid off to lose or throw games. You also have athletes using drugs and other performance enhancement products to cheat. From the business side of things, you have small businesses that are closing their doors for good because they can’t compete with the larger companies, or they get overtaken by the larger corporations, who end up raising prices and/or offering lower quality products. We see companies pay low wages to the workers who do all the work. We see companies pollute our air, water, and land. We even see companies make products that are not utilized, not recyclable, and not sustainable. There are so many companies who make and waste food that is unhealthy and make billions of people and animals sick and die while polluting the earth with the chemicals that they use to make that food. All the while, there are just a few people getting rich in all this madness and what I would call a scheme. It’s a very manipulative and detrimental scheme. You also have the companies paying off or lobbying politicians, so the companies can literally get away with murder.”

“Okay Debbie,” Eric said judgingly and jokingly.

“What?”

“You know. Debbie Downer. Depressing Debbie.”

“f**k you,” Emerald said with some sass. “I’m not being a Debbie. At least, I have hope, and I’m not in denial about how horrible things are.”

“Are you saying that I’m in denial?”

“About some things, yes. Especially how horrible competition is. I think Denial Debbie is way worse than a realist who accepts the horrors of a society gone wrong when they keep the masses asleep through materialistic and trivial means. It’s absolutely atrocious. And, you know I love to have fun and enjoy life and laugh just as much as you do. But yes, I can get serious about stuff, and it’s not bad to want the world to be different and better. I’m obviously not having an aneurysm over it. I still go through the motions of this sometimes pointless and consumeristic life that the government and the rich make us live. So yes, f**k you.”

Emerald and Eric started laughing.

“I love how intelligent you sound during our debates and discussions, and then the foul mouth comes out to play when you get upset with my sarcasm,” Eric said with a smirk.

“Well, you asked for that one. You know how I am.”

“Yes, I do. I sure do miss working with you at the restaurant.”

“It had its moments, and we met some good people. But s**t, that was awful.”

“What didn’t you like?” Eric asked.

“You know.”

“Yes, I guess I do know. The death of the animals, the overweight and fat fuckers, the mean religious customers, and all the s****l harassment from the young boys with their hormones raging.”

“Don’t forget that they only paid us a few coins per hour. Way below minimum wage. It was literally slave labor. The restaurants shouldn’t get to use your tips as compensation for them to meet the minimum wage law. I don’t know what rich f**k was able to get that law passed. Even with the tips, we didn’t make minimum wage. Very unethical and should be illegal. What a horrible industry food service is. And yes, I’m glad I’m vegan and proud enough to not subject myself to a business industry that degrades and objectifies women. I know not all restaurants support or have those issues, but the ones that we worked at did. I have heard the same problems from other women who worked at a lot of other restaurants, and it gets worse when people are drunk and on drugs. It’s unbelievable that they think it’s okay to make s****l remarks to women and grab them without their permission, and the management doesn’t do anything about it. Sometimes, they even participated or were the guilty ones. I guess they are just reflecting what our male religious and political leaders do. It’s absolutely disgusting.”

“Yes, as a man, it’s very upsetting. I’m sorry for that. It had its moments though. A few laughs.”

Emerald and Eric sat in silence for a few seconds and looked out across the pond as the sun and some clouds were reflecting on it. A few more people were out biking and walking at the park. Some squirrels were out running across the grass and climbing up the trees.

“Hey, I just thought of an idea,” Eric said. “When we were just debating about competition, we were competing. I was taking one side, and you were taking another. We were having an intellectual competition. Right?”

“I can see what you are saying. Not sure. I think it would depend on the setting and the style of discussion. I don’t think that either one of us was trying to beat the other one, but you could argue that we were trying to figure out the purpose of competition as to whether it had a positive or not. Our openness and acceptance that we might be wrong might challenge and discount whether we were competing. I think we were just rationalizing or brainstorming. There are definitely some similarities, and it could be a competition if we were trying to beat the other one or if someone was trying to be victorious over the other. I’m just not sure if that is the case here. What do you think?”

“Yes, it’s close. I can definitely get competitive with some discussions and debates and want to win. If I did, I would shove it in your face too. You know. Some good ole fashion gloating.”

“Yes, I know. That’s one of the many things that I don’t like about you and your jerkish ways, but it’s important to accept that we are wrong. I do think there is something to be learned in the process of competition, but it just doesn’t outweigh the negatives. It is good to learn from our mistakes and experiences but not at the expense of feeling hurt and loss and taking advantage of others. There are other more healthy and positive ways to learn from your mistakes and experiences. Either way Eric, you eventually have to come around and admit that you are wrong. You might go through all the stages of grieving or dying and death, which can be unbearable and agonizing. However, it can be very rewarding when you finally get to the acceptance stage. You would think after the many conversations that we have had over the years that you would be more aware of your response to new information that is correct or might be correct. Since this information challenges your old beliefs, you go right into the foregone response that so many humans continue to exhibit. Yes, I’m going to say it again. Denial. That’s very immature of you.”

“I listen and try to be open,” Eric explained.

“Excuse me. What was your initial response to all of this discussion on competition? Wait. Allow me. You said, “That’s f*****g Bullshit. I don’t believe that.””

“I may or may have not said that.”

“What? Do I need a recording device to play back what you actually said, so you will believe it? That’s the denial of the denial. Double denial. You are really f****d up now. You are going to need years and years of psychotherapy to deal with double denial. You know how you are. I think I already called you a stubborn a*s. I may be stubborn too, but I try to make sure I get all the facts and evidence first before I make a conclusion about something. I still try to be open that my opinion could in fact be challenged by new information. As hard and difficult as it may be to accept the truth and have to change my beliefs, it is worth it for my own wellbeing and for others.”

“Well, it’s hard. Like you said, I guess a lot of people jump to conclusions or think they have to be right. It’s like in our DNA or something. People are weird like that. It’s interesting that denial is such a common response even to things that people didn’t have any factual evidence to back up their original beliefs to begin with.”

“You mean like religion,” Emerald said in a suspenseful way.

“Oh, come on now. That’s a hornet’s nest of a discussion. You remember what happened the last time we tried to discuss religion.”

“Yes, I remember someone being closed-minded, getting upset, and not wanting to face reality. Getting upset is in the early stages of grief and loss. It’s not my fault that you want to stay in a place of tradition and debatable stories that have contributed to your beliefs.”

“See. There you go. I could say the same thing about you. That you don’t want to accept the truth that what has been passed down may be factual or truthful and that you are wrong.”

“But isn’t that the problem with debating history and stories is that we don’t know? And, we should admit that we don’t know. We shouldn’t attach to things that evoke some emotional response from us or believe in things that a lot of other people believe in because you worry too much about what others will think of you. To me, that’s dangerous, especially to blindly believe in something that you cannot prove otherwise. You only believe in it because you were told to believe in it. It could have been anything, and you would have believed it. It’s conformity and compliance. It’s not open-mindedness and acceptance. I would even go as far to say that it is not smart or intelligent. It’s better to question the s**t that we have been told and taught, even if it turns out to be true. It’s better to be skeptical than not. There are so many things that we have been told by others that they fully believe in as true, but it is wrong and false. It’s foolish to go along with the group that can’t prove what they are saying is true.”

“Well, we will have to discuss religion some other time because I get passionate about my beliefs and need something better from you to prove me wrong other than your opinions and logical thinking.”

“That’s horseshit Eric. I hate it when people say that they are passionate about something when they are really insecure and in denial about something and don’t want to open their mind to the truth or even see something in another way. That’s not passion. It’s stubbornness, ignorance, and your own conflicted belief system causing you to act like an a*s. Passion is about having a good cause, such as environmentalism, equality, or veganism. If you have real passion and are truly passionate, then your upsettedness is warranted and validated. Being passionate over something that you were told to believe in that you can’t prove is not being passionate. It’s being protective and obstinate.”