The Great Illusion: A Story of Self-Revolution

Episode 1 The Confrontation-3

“To me, my religious beliefs are a good cause, and I will go the grave with them. I have had many years of pondering my beliefs. I have pondered them more than you have. If I thought there was nothing to them or they were a joke, I wouldn’t believe in them. I have a feeling, and they make sense to me. It would take a lot of arguing and debating for you to devalue them where I wouldn’t believe them anymore. Just because you can’t disprove something doesn’t make it untrue.”

“There you go with that asinine and ignorant thinking again. That is crap and a fallacy. Come on Eric. You are a smart man. Enough so, I hang out with you. Sometimes, I do wonder though, especially when religion or politics come into the discussion. If you can’t disprove something, that doesn’t make it true. You have to prove something to make it true. You have to have evidence. You are basically believing someone else’s faulty thinking. It’s okay to want to believe in something like a myth or a story that you can’t prove, but it gets dangerous when you totally believe it as fact and have no doubt at all. It’s a mental illness. You either have to not believe or say, “I don’t know.” You have to admit that you may not be right. If not, you are playing a dangerous game with your mind.”

“Well then, I guess a lot of people are playing a dangerous game.”

“Yes, indeed. They are. The world is definitely full of a bunch of morons. I would even go so far as to say that most people are stupid idiots who just go with the flow and believe what, for the most part, they are told.”

“Are you saying that I’m stupid?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Well, you are implying it.”

“No need to get all upset Eric. You know I have some respect for you.”

“Some?”

“You are just analyzing what I am saying too much and being too serious about our differences. We know we are different in those ways. Don’t blow things out of proportion.”

“Well, let’s call it a day then on the topic of religion. It was fun while it lasted.”

“Yes, we will continue this rough discussion hopefully in the near future.”

“I hope not but maybe.”

They both sat for a few seconds and watched a couple of birds fly over the pond and into a tree. The wind was still blowing the leaves and limbs in the trees and was making a nice and soft rustling sound. The wind caused some ripples on the pond. Some joggers and walkers passed by them.

Emily broke the silence. “How is your lady?”

“She is good. She is really enjoying her job at the construction company. As much as it’s a guy’s world there, she said that she got lucky it is with a good group of guys, or it may be that she makes sure everyone there gets paid.”

“That’s got to be tough to work with those guys and have some major responsibilities like that.”

“Yes, but for some reason, she doesn’t get stressed over stuff like that. I think she is preoccupied with us eventually having a baby. We are two months in now, so it’s coming. It’s going by so fast. It just seems like yesterday that we found out.”

“Yes, crazy indeed. I can’t believe that you both are having a baby. Good luck with all that mess. You breeder,” Emerald said jokingly.

“Well, it wasn’t exactly planned, but we did talk about it a couple of years ago. Just thought it would be longer, but I guess that’s what happens...”

“When you don’t use protection,” Emerald interrupted and said with a smile.

“Absolutely. You never know what might happen. I’d like to think there are no accidents, but I may be making something out of nothing. So, I’ll stop on the baby issue. I know how you feel about people having babies.”

“Yes, that’s an argument waiting to happen. My passion will come out in a nasty way. It’s so upsetting that the people can’t take care of the babies and children that are already in this world. There are millions of them that are starving, poor, homeless, and dying. And, so many women are pressured and forced to keep having them.”

“Calm down Em. What do you want me to do? You know we’ll be good to that kid.”

“You better. That’s the worst. You have all these people having children because they think they should, and they don’t love or take care of the kids. The kids grow up to be monsters with lots and lots of issues. It’s a cycle that needs to be stopped. And…”

“Don’t say abortion.”

“Yes, the whole abortion issue has been shoved down everyone’s throat with false information. How can you be pro-life and also be pro-war, pro-guns, pro-pollution, and also not care at all about the children that have already been born? f*****g hypocrites.”

“Ok, let’s move on.”

“Sorry, I’ll calm down. It’s important to me.”

“I know it is. Anyway, Christina is happy, and that’s all that matters. It’s nice to look forward to seeing someone after being away from them.”

“I know. You guys have been married a while now. What? Five years?”

“Yes, it’s not a super long time but enough to have some of the battles and arguments out of the way. Wouldn’t it be nice to find someone and never fight?”

“Yes, but that would require both parties to have their s**t together before the relationship starts. You may be asking for too much.”

“How’s Mary doing? I haven’t seen her in a few months.”

“She seems to be doing okay. We had a huge fight a couple of months ago. She is still wanting to get married. So, you know.”

“Yes, I can already see how that conversation went, especially if it’s anything like our conversations, but I can’t imagine you two getting into a fight.”

“You’re right. Our version of a fight is a serious back and forth debate with some voices raised, but we try to stay tame. We do love each other very much. I’ve never been in a relationship this long with anyone. After 10 years, you’ve talked about so much, and you know what hurts and helps the other person. It’s almost insane to think about the secrets you share. Good and bad. But yes, she continues to want to get married. She didn’t at first, but I think with all this anti-gay bullshit she needs it or wants to do it to say we did it, which I disagree with. But it would be nice to shove it in their bigoted faces. I wouldn’t mind doing a ceremony, but we shouldn’t have to do something to let everyone know that we love each other. Do you know what I mean?”

“I think I understand, but what will happen if you don’t?” Eric asked interestedly.

“Not sure. I think that’s my point. It wasn’t something agreed upon prior, and we aren’t traditional people like most heteros. So, it’s something she has decided she would like for us, but I don’t need it. I am not afraid of her cheating on me or leaving me because we are not married. I hope she doesn’t go down that road with thinking that I might do something stupid like that on her. I would never, but she still may want the marriage to feel better about that.”

“There’s the fear,” Eric said.

“Yup, but right now, I don’t feel that, but she might. I think we are totally one and committed like an old couple who has been married for 50 years. We are totally devoted to each other. I think even if one of us cheated on the other, which would be horrible, we would still stay together. I guess that’s my point. It’s our choice, but that’s what makes a relationship hard is one party wants to do something and the other one doesn’t. So, you have to talk about it and figure it out like mature adults. But, how much do you push the other person to do what you want before it’s unhealthy, or how much do you give in to the other person before it’s unhealthy?”

“Those are great questions or points. That’s where the arguing and fighting come in or the domination and submission. I think it’s good to compromise. Find a middle ground where both parties are happy. You might want to think about something you could do, even if it is some spiritual ceremony with you two.”

“We’ll see. But other than that, she seems to be doing good. We really enjoy our time together. I’m glad I found someone with some of the same interests and likes. That would suck if we had too many opposing interests. There’s a few, but it’s not bad. And, it’s awesome that she doesn’t smoke, drink, or do drugs, especially due to my past.”

“Yes, I think Christina and I are half and half. We just try to not push each other on some of the things we don’t agree with.”

“That’s what I always loved about Mary. She’s not pushy, but she still expresses herself and respects me. The way it should be.”

“Yes, sorry, you have to go through what you go through with society’s…”

“And religious standards, and don’t forget political ones too.” Emerald said sarcastically.

“Hey, I was trying to show some compassion.”

“That’s the point though. Some of the same things that you believe in conflict with me and my life and who I am. It’s not okay. As much as I like you and even love you and can see you care and are lighthearted for the most part, there are some contradictions with what you say and what you believe. And I know I don’t have control over you, and you can do whatever you want to do, but you have to admit that you support the same institutions that have horrible and awful beliefs about homosexuality and other things. I’ll say it again. It’s not okay.”

“Well, I’m not defending their hate, ignorance, and bigotry towards any of the LGBTQIA folks. We are all people, and I don’t think it’s okay either Em. There are religious and politically traditionalist people who are good and don’t believe in hatred towards others who are different than them. You know that. Change takes time. You have the people at the top who are from another time who still hold traditional values and make it seem like the entire group holds those values. A lot of them don’t.”

“But a lot do, and they are the ones spreading the hate and passing the discriminatory and oppressive legislation. You should not be allowed to be in a position of power or authority if you believe in and practice hate, discrimination, and bigotry. It’s terrorism to a lot of the population and citizens, and it’s counterproductive to society.”

“It’s not good for you to generalize either. I guess I’m a progressive traditionalist, which I know sounds kind of weird. Maybe that’s not the right term. That could mean that I am more traditionalist. Maybe there is a better term than that. Moderate traditionalist?”

“I don’t know about the term. Maybe moderate traditionalist. But, either way, traditionalists, who don’t believe in what your group is saying, should be speaking out against them instead of staying silent. Silence is consent. It’s the same as going along with a murderer by not saying something to the murderer and letting the murderer murder. You have to try and stop the murderer. If not, you are an accomplice, and you are also a murderer. If you don’t believe in what your group and your group leaders are saying and believe in, you need to either speak out, make a change, or leave the group. Hatred is an awful practice to be silent about.”