The Fall

I hate being sick.

Two days after one of the worst days of my life, I was lying in bed feeling like I was dying. I could not keep any food down, and on top of that, I was still feeling sorry for myself over being dumped for a man. You know, it really has a way of making you stop and think, do I look like a man? Was that why he liked me? Should I wear more makeup? Maybe I should work out and re-evaluate the way that I dress. I could stand to lose a few pounds and maybe if I made more of an effort, but I push the thought out of my head. Anger welling up inside of me, why do I have to change how I look to get a man, I want to have someone love me for me not because I look good in the light of day. Sadness and nausea making their way back to the forefront of my mind, if this keeps up I will lose 30 pounds just from being sick.

Rolling over in bed I landed on the remote and changed the channel. The news was on and instead of finding the remote I just left it. I wasn’t really watching the love story that was on anyway, besides no one ever really ends up with a man that looks like Nathan Fillion anyway. sigh…

I watched the news for a few minutes and got bored. I decided to take a hot shower and see if that would make me feel better. Heading to the bathroom, I could hear the news in the background: Flu epidemic is still going strong. 2000 dead and more are expected to die in the following days. The city holds Flu clinics and urges people to stay home. I could barely hear it as the water started running, I thought to myself that number can’t be right, it was only two days ago that there were 1000 dead. I must have heard it wrong. Disrobing I jumped into the shower the hot water felt good on my skin, making me feel more alive than I had in the past few days.

Bang. Bang. Bang. I stuck my head out of the shower. Bang. Bang. Bang.

Who the hell could that be? I thought it was annoying .

Grabbing a towel I turned off the water and made my way to the peephole. Ugh... It was my very annoying neighbor Dustin. Whatever he wanted, I did not want to deal with him right now, I just wanted to feel better by thinking about revenge on Mike and Sam. Maybe I could go lick their door handles and sneeze all over their crap so they'll be as sick as me. But with my luck, only one will get sick and the other will take care of the sick person making their love stronger.

I thought about pretending that I was not home and hoping that Dustin would just go away.

Bang. Bang. Jane, are you home?

No, I thought I’m not... just go away. Heading back to the bedroom I grabbed a robe, Dustin was not going to leave till I opened the door. As I opened the door Dustin pushed his way into my apartment.

"Well come right in," I said as sarcastically as I could.

Dustin was out of breath or at least he was acting that way.

"What's up I asked, I was busy."

"O sorry, I just found out, I'm sorry are you okay? Do you need to talk with someone if you need me." Dustin flopped down on my couch and held his arms open for me. I closed the door, thankful that my back was to him so he could not see me roll my eyes at his attempt to comfort me. Dustin has always had a thing for grabbing attention. I think that's the real reason he became a nurse not to help people but so that he would get praise from everyone he meets. He has this way of making every story he tells circling back to him.

Finally, Dustin put his arms down and made a pouty face like that of a child being told "no." I stayed by the door hoping that it would send him the message that I did not expect him to be staying.

"What are you talking about? I'm fine" aside from the death flu and the broken, twisted and smashed heart. I was fine.

“I just heard that Mike dumped you, is it true?" he asked with his head turned like a confused puppy.

"Yes, it's true, but I'm fine. I had a good cry and all the ice cream in my freezer so I'm good. But thanks for your concern." I hoped that I sounded sincere in my practiced speech.

Dustin looked at for a minute trying to gauge if I was telling the truth. He must have decided that I was and that he was not going to get any more information from me because he stood up and walked over to me, hugged me for what seemed like a long time then he pulled back and said "I'm just down the hall if you need me. I'll be there, just stop over any time".

I took this as my cue to open the door and using my body pushed him into the hall.

“OK thanks," I said relieved not for his offer but because I had gotten him out in the hallway.

“No really he said any time at all" he said turning. I'm sure I caught a hint of a smile as he started toward his place. Oh great just what I need, Dustin to make me his cause. I really hate being sick.