Muscled Mafia Love

Chapitre Un.

Muscled Mafia Love: Chapitre Un

Love.

What is love?

Love is true devotion to someone beyond yourself. Love is a passion; love is kind, trust respect and truth. Love is when you think that every single bit of a person is amazing. Words can"t describe love fully. Love is an emotion. Love is life. Without love life has no meaning. That"s what love is. Love is a complex thing. It means making that person a priority, sometimes even above yourself. Love is giving your all with all your heart. Trusting with your eyes closed. Caring, nurturing, believing, and never expecting anything in return.

Well, I don"t believe in love.

Why would I?

With all the luck I get with the most beautiful women I"ve ever seen, I would understand why someone like me just doesn"t believe in love.

I"ve never had the best luck with anyone. I would take a girl out on a date and it"ll end happily but I would never get a call back asking for a next date.

Exhibit A.

"You"re so sweet! It"s so hard to see why you are single." My beautiful date Kara Klaveno sat opposite of me, taking a sip of her red wine. "You"d be surprised." I raised my brows a bit before sighing.

It was almost too good to be true, this being my third date with a different girl and it going in the right direction. She was too kind, too beautiful for someone like me. "So what do you do, Demetrios?" Kara asked with a smile and I grinned. "Ah, nothing interesting. I"m just a boxing teacher at a local shop." I replied and she tilted her head. "I do like strong men." She stated and I nodded softly.

If only she knew.

"You have an accent, right?" She questioned and I spoke in my native tongue in response. "Greek. Born and raised in Patras but I moved here about ten years ago." I gave her all the information she needed to know. "Shouldn"t your accent have faded?" Kara picked up a piece of her steak and chewed it in her mouth.

"No. My mother still speaks Greek so I speak Greek back to her." I chuckled. "Here"s your bill, sir." The waiter came by and patted my shoulder and I stiffened for a bit. "Thanks." I mumbled, pulling out my credit card and putting it into the slot, handing it back to the waiter. "Let"s get ready to go." I smiled softly at Kara.

She might just be the girl I need.

The waiter came back with a receipt and bid us farewell, watching us walk of the restaurant. "Want me to take you home?" I asked and Kara shook her head, her red dress making her blue eyes pop. "No. I"ll catch a cab home." I nodded, pulling out my keys. "Thanks Demetrios." She kissed my cheek and I blushed. "I"ll call you for another date." I watched her get off into the cab with a smile.

She never did.

I didn"t know what it was about me that people didn"t like. Was it my blond tousled hair that had hung over my head or was it my blue eyes that were just, too blue? Was it my personality, did I come off as overbearing and too demeaning? What was it about me that turned people away?

Was it the aura that I had? Was I just too kind? Probably.

This happened every time I went out on a date and for some reason, I still kept trying to achieve that happiness and be loved by someone I loved. For some reason, I guess it was a sign telling me that I would never be loved.

I couldn"t love and I could never be loved.

"You"ll find the right person and they"ll love you for who you are, Demetrios. Don"t give up on love." My mother Aurelia Kanzaki would always tell me after every single date ended. "Love is a beautiful thing."

I would always snort in disbelief before saying the same thing to her every time. "I scorn your idea of love."

And it was true. I did. Even after my father Antonio Causi betrayed her and married another man, leaving me with a step-sister and a brother that I despised to my very core, Aurelia Kanzaki was still the same happy person she was before that happened. How someone can be so cheerful after their world fell apart is beyond me.

I"m dying and I haven"t even experienced a real relationship yet! I somehow think that I won"t ever have one. I don"t even have acquaintances, let alone friends.

I had thought I would have friends in my step-sister Zicara Kiloway and my brother Armando Causi, but I was wrong. I was wrong from the start for even trying to make a relationship with them despite the fact that it was going against morals and it would hurt my mother.

I was naturally a nice person. I wanted everyone to be friends with everyone but I learned the hard way that everyone can"t be nice.

Zicara tormented me and made fun of me while Armando just egged her on and didn"t do anything to stop her mean words, her vicious claws and the whips she used...

I had long stopped talking to them and I heard that they were shacking up with my dead-beat of a father and his lover, Taron Kiloway in the same city that my mother and I lived in, New York City, just a few minutes away from Manhattan.

I still had the scars from where Zicara used to beat me on my back. I still have the hallucinations from the trauma she caused me. Her words were so cruel and demeaning and they never left my mind. They played through my mind like a melody, that played on and on. Those words made me feel so less of myself than I already did. Her words belittled me and I couldn"t even look in the mirror at myself without feeling disgusted.

Hell below is probably nothing compared to the hell I went through, but I forgave her.

Not because she has to be the spawn of Satan or maybe the fact that she"s miserable, but the fact that I have a heart of gold.

Just like when the man who inseminated my mother and created me used to abuse me whenever my mom wasn"t around. I still have the cigarette burns on my chest from where he used to put the hot ends on my skin and watch me scream and cry while he held me down. He also used to slap me, punch me, throw phones at my head and laugh while my skull cracked. He used to enjoy watching me bleed and he used to tell me how he wished I would die.

I still have the scar to prove it.

That scar is also the reason why I refused to let people get near me or behind me. I always had to be behind a person or next to them.

Even now when I look back at being scared of that man, hoping he wouldn"t do anything to my mom, hoping he would stop and one day realize, that I was his son but no. He never did. Even now, Konstantinos Kanzaki or better known as Antonio Causi still belittles me to this day.

My mother knows nothing of course. She doesn"t ask why I choose to wear long sleeved shirt or pants even when its sweltering outside, but she speculates about it. She doesn"t ask why I"m afraid to hug people but she speculates. She doesn"t ask why I"m careful about who I make mad, but she speculates. She doesn"t ask why I cry and scream in my sleep, but she most definitely speculates about it. She all the more speculates about the fact that I never look in the mirror or take pictures with her.

"You"re so f*****g ugly and stupid as hell. Don"t know why Aurelia didn"t just kill you."

Things like that play tricks on your mind. I know my mother questions and has thoughts about why I take pills but she will never know that it was for my depression and my insomnia. I still see them in my dreams when I sleep so I can never sleep because of the fear of waking up and they"re standing there.

My downs defeat my ups which is why I"m so careful about what I do.

I don"t know how I survive everyday like this, but I do. I"m glad I have my punching bags to relay all my anger out on. I don"t know how I survived this far without any friends except my mother. People at school used to look down on me everyday because they claimed I was too different. I had an weird accent, I looked weird, I was bowlegged, and I was too nice. They made fun of everything.

Which is why I never had any friends in high school or in college.

It was just me, my mom and my cat Bella. I sometimes wondered if Bella hated me too. She probably did.

"DEMETRIOS LUKAS KANZAKI!" I snapped my head up from the couch with drool on my face while I took in my surroundings. It looked like I stayed at my mom"s house again. I mean, I didn"t like to be alone for various reasons and my apartment just reminded me of how lonely I felt. "Next time, warn me when you choose to stay over night again. Almost took your god damn head off with this bat." My mother groaned as she put the gold bat down on the side of the wall and ran a hand through her hair.

"Sorry ma. I"ll warn ya next time." I grumbled out, looking at the time. 8:34. Just the time I need to get up and get ready for work at the gym. It didn"t make good money but it was good to put my boxing and karate skills to work.

"Are you alright, Αγαπητέ μου?" She asked and I rubbed my face (my dear). "Yeah, I"m fine." I didn"t like to trouble her with my worries when I knew she was going through her own. She didn"t know I knew, but she was having problems with our father. If that piece of s**t came anywhere near her, I was going to have to turn into a different person.

"Well, time for work. Get up and get dressed." I nodded at her and headed to the bathroom, ready to start my day.

Another day down, another one to face.