Together Forever

The Messy Kitchen

The phone is ringing on the other side. Heavy breathing is noticebly present. Still ringing. The frustration is growing. The phone is ringing. No answer. For a moment he wondered why no one wants to answer their phones. It made him feel more frustrated with the entire situation. As he enters the front door of the house, he walks towards the kitchen counter to plug his phone into the charger. It must be ready when Michelle would call. He noticed on the screen, it was Sunday. No wonder there was no answer at the office, disgusted with his own idiocy. Staring at the mess in the kitchen he remembered what happened last night. The Vodka, almost empty and broken glass everywhere on the floor. He knew that is wasn’t a dream. He could see that Kyle didn’t even come back to the house last night. He was not going to worry about this chaos now. He checked his phone once more. It’s not that he did not believe Michelle when she said she’ll call. He had to make sure the volume on the phone was on high. He placed it on the counter, before drifting in a haze towards the shower.

“Hey watch it!” he heard the angry voice behind him.

Turning around to see what is going on “I apologize” he replied.

Sean emerged from his regular coffe shop for his favourite beveredge on a cold winter’s morning. With his mind elsewhere he nearly bumped into a group of guys passing on the sidewalk. It’s been a long night. He was busy preparing an assignment that he needed to send off today. Between working full-time and taking night clases, he could feel the toll it’s been taking on his body. He is the kind of person who enjoys his sleep. While others drank and socialized to manage their stress, sleeping, for him was the best option. Now even that has been taken from him. It has become difficult to cope, but it’s not as if he had any choice. He had to start somewhere to try and create a better future. The past three years working to try and support his family has proven futile. The guilt of their predicament pressed heavily on his shoulders. Afterall he is the man of the house and the responsibility rested with him. He felt that he did not make any progress in this world, constantly having to worry about surviving. Twenty two years old and there is no hope in sight. The promise of a future always laughed back at him, taunting him every day. It’s something he longed for, to be successful. To have a happy life, hell, just to live would be a welcoming change. This struggle is exhausting!

At least working in a guesthouse taught him one thing. How to be polite with rude customers even though he hated to pretend not to be offended or angry with them. It was important to present a perfect smile to each one, as they are always correct and the poor slave on the other end is the incompetent i***t. He was extremely frustrated with the self-proclaimed righteousness of some people. Acting high and mighty, treating people like they are worth s**t. Having this experience opened his eyes to the cruelty off people. Between the public, standing in front off you and the manager standing behind you, looking over your shoulder; wainting for you to f**k up, there was no room to breathe. There was no place for any mistakes.

“Is that all you have to offer, weirdo?” the man shouted as Sean was walking away from the group. “Hey I’m talking to you fucker!” the shouts continued.

Hessitantly he turned to face them again “I am sorry for my mistake.”

“Sorry won’t help you not to be an i***t!” he angerly snapped back at him.

Another thing that he has learned is that it does not help to argue with someone who’s angry or that wants to provoke a confrontation. The best option is to apologize and keep moving forward. Away from the situation. Offering apologies is not unfamalliar to him. His boss did not hesitate to point out all the mistakes he makes. It’s not as if he tried to be spiteful and not do his work well, often simple mistakes just happen. It’s only human to make mistakes, inspite of trying your utmost best.

“Hey, I’m still talking to you.” The aggravator kept yelling.

Trying to block the sounds from his mind, he kept on walking focussing on moving his legs. He kept his eyes on the sidewalk, searching his mind to for a way to escape this crowd. Glacing back over his shoulder to see if they are still following him, he sighed with relief and turned around the corner towards the flat as he collided with someone approaching. The cofffe splattered from the cup which ended up on the sticky sidewalk together with a few books.

“s**t!” He exclaimed and rushed to retrieve the books before they got too wet, his hands shaking. “I am really sorry!” not looking to see who it was that is the unfortunate victim is this assult.

“Don’t worry” the soft reply came. “It’s not that bad.”

He looked up to see the beautiful face. She did appear not to be aggravated by this accident, yet it made him feel like an even bigger i***t. “Sorry” it was the only words that found their way to his lips.

Flicking her hair over her shoulder she came to her feet, whipeing the last drops of coffee from the books. “It’s fine sweety. This could happen to anyone. Actually, that’s why I hate corners.” She said laughing a little. “Just keep an eye out, next time.” Her words came to him as he watched her disappear around the corner from where he just came.

For a brief moment that all too familiar curiocity took over again, making him forget about the angry crowd that was yelling at him and he poked his head around the corner. “Typical” he thought to himself. “A beautiful girl was always with the popular guy.” Thinking, he could not understand why a friendly girl like her, would hang out with a guy who act like a pompous ass. Somethings in this world is just too difficult to understand he thought to himself as he continued down the street towards the flat.

Running out of breath, he stumbled up the stairs for his evening class. It was his day off, but a few chores kept him busy during the day. Given the stress off this morning with the coffee incident he decided to take a quick nap, but overslept. He was already late to meet a classmate. They worked together on the assignment which was due ten minutes ago. Out of breath they met one another in the hallway.

“Whoa, dude. Where were you? I’ve been waiting here for thirty minutes.” The expression on his face indicated that he was not happy.

“Sorry. It’s been a hectic day. Needless to say, I overslept. I’ve made some last minute changes last night.”

“I hope that means we’ll get a good grade on this assignment” Nathan said, as if he didn’t know what to expect.

They always got good grades when he teamed up with Sean. That’s why he tried his best to work with him as much as he can.

“Why else do you think I’d kill myself over a project.” He responded still trying to calm his breathing.

“Come, there’s still time. Aparently Prof. Hudson is sick and will not attend class tonight. His assistant haven’t arrived yet, so we can slip into class.” He said, almost shoving him forward.

There was a loud noise hanging in the air as they entered the classroom, coming from only a small group of people. Everyone was busy with each other in heavy conversation, bragging about the weekend adventures. He always wondered how many of these stories were actually true. If he had to brag about his weekend, what will he have to say? Stayed in the flat, ate popcorn and watched the entire second season of Lost. Working with difficult clients all week to try and make a living. What kind of life is that to brag about? They took their seats and waited for the assistant to arrive. From what everybody was talking about, this new assistant was somewhat attractive. He heard a few of the other students talking about her as if she’s a prize to be won. He hated that sort of superficial mentality.

The door slowly opened as the new assistant entered, walking over to the table placing the books on the table. He shifted nerveously in his seat. “s**t” he mumbled to himself, lowering his head.

“What’s wrong, dude?” Nathan asked.

“Nothing!” Sean’s reply snapped back in haste.

“Good evening everyone. Prof. Hudson is not feeling well, so I will be handing out your assignments for this week.” She started off, noticing a familiar face in the crowd before her.

“I hope that all your projects are here on the table.” Scanning over the room, staring at him.

“Dude, she’s checking you out” Nathan teased him.

“Shut up!”

After the class was over, all the while noticing a few looks towards him, he walked over to the table. He had to at least apologize and explain what happened. He did not want her to think that he’s a complete i***t.

“Sorry for what happened earlier” he stood in front of the desk. “I did not mean for it to happen.”

“Really?” looking at him with disbelief.

“Yes, I.. I was not paying attention…” the words struggled to find their way from his lips.

“I don’t know what you were thinking off, but spilling hot coffee is dangerous.“ she looked him dead in the eye.

“I know. Allow me to at least buy you a coffee, to apologize” he tried to persuade her.

“Coffee?” she looked with surprise at him. “Didn’t you drench me in enough coffee this morning?” she stood up to pack all the paper into the bag she needed to deliver to Prof. Hudson.

“Uh… I…” he could not find the words, feeling like an even bigger i***t for suggesting it.

“You can take me for a drink. Then you have a deal” she said with a smile.

“Uh, allright…” he responded struggling to understand her response. “Sounds fair.”

“Perfect. I’ll meet you at McKennies in an hour. Then you can tell me all about how sorry you are” gracefully smiling as she walked out the door.

She left him standing there, dumbfounded. What the hell just happened here, the thought raced in his mind? “Did she just make a pass at me? But she is with that pompous ass.” Not having much experience with the whole dating ritual, it was difficult for him to decern what her intentions are, but he needed to apologize and he is a man of his word. What her intent was is not important.

Arriving at the bar, he noticed that is was quiet. It’s probably an usual oucurrance for a weeksday. You could smell the smoke hanging in the air, it was overpowering. Normally he avoids any kind of bar, especially over the weekends. It was too growded with a lot of strangers. That made him feel anxious. He had enough difficult clients to handle during the day. When he was not working or studying, he just stayed at home, safely enclosed in his own privacy. McKennies was a popular place over the weekends. Most of the students started their barhopping escapade here, never knowing where they’ll end up at the end of the night. Michelle was already at the bar, waiting for him. Checking his watch to see if he’s late, he noticed a few guys haning around her offfering to buy her drinks. Was it her lusious golden blonde hair that gently brushed in her neck or perhaps the deep dark brown eyes that lured everyone to her? Could it be her amazing body that made everyone so horny? What ever their reasons, the guys appeared ready to fight with one another for her attention.

He approached her slowly and she turned to smile at him. Suddenly all the angry, jelous eyes were directed towards him. He felt their hatered towards him. As if they were cheated out of something. Carefully he said hello to everyone and took a seat next to Michelle.

“Sorry boys” she turned towards them with a grin “my date is here” and turned back around.

He shuddered at her comment. Shifting nerviously in his seat.

“What… hey…“ the moans of disappointment came from the small crowd “this guy? C’mon” they protested as they walked back to their table.

“Perfect timing” she smiled at him

“How so?” the confusion on his face was screaming for attention.

“Those guys got a little too intense”

“So, I am your date, tonight?” he carefully enquired with great concern.

“Yeah” she looked at him “does it make you nervous?” moving her fingers to brush over his knee under the counter.

He wanted to jump at her touch, but the fear rendered him frozen in the moment. “No” he replied.

“I don’t bite you know,?” she raised the discomfort in him. “Unless you want me too” she added with a devilish grin on her face.

His eyes strecthed to her obvious shameless banter and he shifted again, wondering how he’s going to get out of this situation.

“I thought you have a boyfriend. I saw you meet up with that group of guys in front off the coffee shop, this morning.”

She removed her hand and started to laugh out loud at the entire situation. This only added to his own confusion, still looking for a way out.

“Relax, sweety” she finally spoke “I am with someone and happily so.”

Not knowing wheater to believe her or not he searched for an appropriate reply. “You are?” the question was hessitant.

“Yes I am.” She replied. “I just like to see what people’s reactions are when they are not expecting it.”

“What do you mean not expecting it?” he looked at her, trying to understand this strange woman.

“I could see that you are not like these other guys, who jumps for any reason to get with a beautiful girl.”

“But you are with that guy then….” He said, trying to understand this obviously complicated woman.

She just laughed again. “No silly! That’s my i***t brother and his friends.” She continued laughing.

“Okay…”

“Sometimes, I cannot believe that we are related.” She sighed, looking over at him. “Aren’t yu going to order that promised drink?” she playfully enquired.

For a moment he just stared at her in disbelief. She was stunningly beautiful, intelligent, witty and her personality; while strange still alluring.

“Well, yes. What can I get you?”

“I’ll have a Vodka and Lime, thank you.”

“Allright.” He said and turned toward the bartender. “Two Vodka and lime’s please.”

“So tell me the story behind this mysterious coffee-spiller” she teased him.

“Actually, there’s not much to say. I was up ‘till early to make a few changes to the assignment and needed my caffeine for the day” he replied.

“Oh, that’s it? Nothing more to that mysterious look that you’re portraying?”

“No. I mostly keep to myself. Between work and classes I am always busy.” he tried to convence her that it’s worth something.

“Where do you work?” Their drinks were ready.

“Over at Golden Hill Guest House.” He replied before taking a large gulp, hoping that the alcholol will kick in fast. “At least it pays the bills.”

“I gather that you do not enjoy it?” she enquired

“No, definitely not, but I have no choice.” He tried to avoid looking at her. He felt ashamed of his responsibilities.

“Sweety, we always have a choice.” She smiled at him.

“Perhaps…” he let the words hang while taking another sip.

“What about friends?”

“No, none. I do not have time for that.” He replied, trying to convince her.

“Sweety, we have to change that” she looked at him with a feint expression of pity.

“No, no. That’s not neccisary. I’m quite happy with ‘boring’ thank you” he was quick to reply.

“No one should edure life alone. There’s so much you’re missing out on”

“I’m used to it by now” he could feel the warmth from the drink. “How about you? Happy relationship” he desperately tried to change the conversation.

“Yes. His name is Kenneth. He’s also a student here. Psychology.” She happily played along with his, not so conveluded, attempt.

“Sounds like a clever guy” he responed absent-mindedly. “How long have you been dating?”

“He is. It’s been more than two years now. We are serious about each other. Getting married when we’re finished with school.” She said, removing the engagement ring from around her neck.

His eyes only widened, noticing the size of the diamond. “Wow! How can he afford that thing?”

“His parents are rich. They do commercial development everywhere throughout the country.” she replied as if it was nothing to her.

“Lucky girl. You’ve landed a big one.”

“I get that a lot. Even my parents were happy to know that I hooked a big fish.” She sighed, taking another sip. “You know, I do not care about his parents’ money. All I want is him. Money, no money, it does not matter.”

He looked at her with admiration as he could hear the sencarity in her voice. “You must really love him, then”

“I do” she smiled “What about you? Anyone special in your life?”

Nerviously shifting in his seat, he took another sip, hoping the warmth will flood his mind and body. “No. I do not have time for any distractions now” glancing back at her.

“Sounds like an excuse to me.” Looking at him, trying to understand this ‘world’ he enclosed himself off in.

Neither of them noticed what time it was. After drink number two, he loosenedd up a bit and then he became quite the conversationalist. More than once he noticed the surprise on her face after making an observation. They enjoyed each other’s company, but when ‘last call’ was announced it was time to head home. He knew that he’ll pay the price in the morning for staying out this late, but that would be a problem for later. He offered to walk with her, but Kenneth was already waiting outside. They offered Sean a ride to his flat, but he declined. He enjoyed to go for a quiet walk, besides he just lived around the corner, down the street, so it was not too far away.

Feeling a bit off balance from too many drinks, he continued down the road towards his home. He thought about what Michelle said. How she did not care about the money. All that she wanted, was Kenneth. How strong must that love be? Can you really give yourself completely to someone else? Is that what resembled a happy relationship? It was something that he secretly wanted for so long. He never did meet someone, because he kept himself hidden from social events. He never thought himself to be the lovable type, yet Michelle really enjoyed his company this evening.

Could he be happy? Is there a chance to become something in this world? The thoughts travelled throught his foggy mind. Michelle was prepared to pave her own way through life, that was evident. Not even her beauty was something that she abused for her own will. No, she was entirely grounded, she was a easy going and real person. That he found a liking to, as he kept walking home. She took a job as a teachers’ assistant to save money for her own future. Her father is a well-known laywer in town, why not take his money. She’d rather make her own. As she said, then all the success and failure that she obtains, will not be attributed to anyone but herself. What a unique person, he kept thinking.

Coming to a halt in front of his door, he searhes for the keys. Struggling to fit it in the keyhole he started to laugh. That is a sign that there was one too many drinks on the counter tonight. Never before did anyone have the luck to pull him out of his flat for a, not so unpleasant evening. Drinks, lovely conversation and just letting loose for a change. This was a strange feeling to have. Is this is what it means to ‘let live’, he thought while reaching for the stairs, one step at a time. It this what the other students experience, with their weekend escapades? Is this what friends do? These thoughts kept maulling in his mind as he reached his room, plunged onto the bed and drifted off to a faraway land. A land of no worries.

The next morning when he woke the feeling of nausea reminded him about last night. It was not a dream as he can still taste the Vodka in his mouth. It was just as he suspected. He was paying the price today, for something he did yesterday. It was a terrible feeling, but calling in sick is not an option. It’s not the kind of person who he is. He is always the responsible one, even if last night cannot prove that at all. Reluctantly he got out off bed and got ready for work. The smell of Vodka was present, it took quite some effort to get rid of it, but brushing his teeth three times, a few cups of coffee and a handful of breath mints he was ready as he ever could be.

It was a long day. The morning felt if there was not end to it. As he could not be bothered by anything today, except for the feeling of being sick, he wished that the day would end. Even if it ended, there was still the reality of class that evening. His phone started to ring which was unusual. Nobody ever phoned him, except for his mother or if he was at home and there is a crisis at work. Perhaps a few other instances, but this was a surprise. He looked at the caller and a combination of anxiety and excitement started to bubble to the surfice. It was Michelle calling. She invited him to a birthday party she’s having on Saturday for a friend. Sean did not want to commit to the event, but with Michelle being the forceful personality she was, he could not get out off this. After threatening him to kidnap him from his own flat, he was on board.

He was happily surprised to find that the birthday party was not as bad as he feared it will be. Being shy and not participating in conversations, this definitely was a welcome change. It was a pleasant experience. Getting to know other people, listening to their stories and observing their reactions were in itself a delight; very entertaining.

“See, I told you it would do you some good to get out of that horrible and boring routine.” She told him a few days after the party.

“Yes, I see it now.” He replied as they enjoyed a warm coffee at the shop where they first ran into one another, not too long ago.

Every weekend became something that he looked forward to. Getting together with Michelle and Kenneth to relax after a long week of hard work and struggling. Regailing each other with the amusing stories they encountered during the week. It was if Sean finally awakened from a deep sleep after all these years. That which he saw the ‘normal’ people do, was now also part of his life. For the first time in many years he could feel hope shining into his dark world. A hope for a normal life. The promise of happiness. The feeling was strange and foreign to him, but he welcomed it with grattidude, none the less.

It was September and Spring was in the offing. Thinking back how much his life has changed over the past three months, was unthinkable. He could barely recognize that, once shy boy anymore. Michelle really had a good influence on him, which he’ll forever be gratefull for. It was the usual get together over the weekend, even after a crazy schedule between work and exams. Three weeks had passed when they once more found time for each other’s company.

“Next weekend, we are having a large event at my parent’s house. It’s their 25th Anniversary. I want to you be there as well.” Michelle extended the invitation to him.

He looked at her with surprise. “Why do you want me there with something so personal?”

“There will be a lot of important people, I’d like you to meet.” She said with that obvious hidden agenda-smile on her face.

“What are you planning again?” he asked, knowing by now it’s futile to argue with her.

“I will discuss it with you after the party.”

“Fine” he replied. “If I did not know by now to go along with your agenda, I probably never will.” He sighed with a smile of acceptance.

It was a large gathering at the house. Must have been at least two hundred people attending this event. He was anxious with this large crowd, but he just kept reminding himself that he is not the scared little man that he was a few months ago. He met up with Michelle and she introduced him to her parents. Sean politely extended his congratulations to them both, before being dragged by the arm. Michelle was on a different kind of mission that night. She dragged him by the arm, meeting everyone she intended him to meet, one by one. It was exhausting to start the same conversation with fifty different people.

He needed to take a moment to compose himself after this meet and greet session she made him partake in. After refreshing in the bathroom he went over to the table with all the food on the lawn outside, where you could hear the chatter from everyone. Seeing the laughter on each face as this night was a complete celebration. Twenty five years, he thought to himself, is a very long time. I’m not even twenty five yet and they are celebrating the length of my life-time of a happy marriage. His thoughts was interrupted when he felt a hand carefully brushing up against the left side of his lower back. He jumped at the contact, knowing that it was not Michelle. When he looked over to see who this was, that all familiar anxiety came to life.

“What do you say, shall we take a walk in the garden?” the question was skilfully whispered into his ear.

He could not move. Frozen. Staring at this face in front of him. Searching for the irony in this moment. He could smell the alcholol heavily. It was Michelle’s brother, standing there, coming on to him.

“Was he just that drunk, or can he really not remember how he yelled at me a few months ago?” the thought finally entered his mind.

“C’mon. I’ve had my eye on you since you arrived this evening”

For a moment Sean stood there, thinking about the day. About the humiliation he felt and the anger building within him. He is never one to act out his anger, but now he saw a perfect opportunity for a little payback. Why not take atvandtage of this pompous ass, who made him feel like an i***t?

“Sounds good to me.” Sean finally replied.

“Wait one minute, then follow me.” Aaron whispered one more.

Watching this drunk figure disappear between the shadows of the crowd, he started to wonder again. “How did he know to approach me? How could this rugged tough guy act like this? Could he see that I was gay? Was it that obvious?” he nerveously started to look at the people surrounding him, trying to determine if they saw what was happening. There was nothing out off the ordinary. Everybody was still blissfully enjoying the excitement of the party.

“There you are!” he heard Michelle’s voice calling in his direction.

“Yes? Here I am” he announced.

“Come let’s go and have our talk now. “ she said, dragging him off to her dad’s study.

Sean could not help but wonder what she wanted to talk to him about. Did she now what just happened outside? There at the champaigne table. Was that her intentions in the first place? He got worried for a moment.

“Sweety” she started to talk as they made their way to the leather seats in the study.

“Yes..?” he hesitantly replied.

“My dad offered me money to start something that I’ve been toying with for the past two years.” She started to explain. “I want you to be my business partner in this new venture.”

“Whoa… what?” he asked not minding his own surprise.

“Yes. I’ve seen your assignements and I know that you’ll make the perfect partner to start our new Marketing firm.” She said while proudly reclining into the chair. “I want us to work together.”

“I.. I do not know what to say…” he searched for the right words.

“Good, then I’ll take that as a ‘yes’” she accepted with confidance. “Do not even think about fighting against it. I’ll run through the entire plan with you, next week and then we take it from there. This is the reason why I’ve asked you to attend the event this evening. To meet the possible clients.”

“Okay…” he said, still not fully capable to fathem what just happened.

“Wonderful! I’m so excited about this!” raising her glass to toast.

“Y…, yes. Wonderful!” Sean replied now with a bit more confidance. “I just have a few questions…”

“I look forward to this venture. All the questions and details is for next week. We can get together and I will share it all. Now, let’s go and re-join the party.” She said moving towards the door. “My brother will be wondering where you went….” She truned her head to look over at Sean with a naughty grin, then disappeared around the corner…

“How the hell did she know!?” he stood there in the office, frozen once more as his legs did not want to move. “How could she just drop a comment like that as if it was nothing?” He tried to run after her, but she made her way through the full house. She spoke with her father, who nodded his head as if he agreed with her. Perhaps it was confirming what we just discussed, or was it something else? Feeling exposed between all the people, he wanted to leave, but something else took hold. What is the best way to conquer fear, anger he answered himself. He got angry for feeling like an i***t, stormed out off the house, into the garden, searching. Searching for that pompous ass…

Still dripping after a warm shower, he stands in front of the tall mirror in the corner of the bedroom. It was a routine by now. Checking to see that everything was perfectly groomed. Secretly, he loved staring into his own eyes. It’s like he’s searching for answers. Answers to questions that haunted him. Looking deeper, making sure that no one could see what he saw in his own reflection. Opening the drawer, he looked for a shirt. Today, it did not matter which one, as long as he was wearing one. This was unusual for him, as every last detail of his appearance was planned to perfection. The phone rang. He ran, the towel slipping from his waiste. He grabbed the phone while clinging onto the towel. You never know who’s watching you from next door and he’s not one ffor flauting anything.

“Allright, thanks for the update. I’m almost done, see you in twenty minutes” he turned around to get dressed.

He knew that Michelle will keep him updated. She was always true to her word, which he respected about her. Even after six years she stayed true to their relationship. He was proud to say that Lumino Media Solutions was a huge success, after many years of hard work. Walking into the office each day, was a pleasure. She was the one that kept her promise. She was the one that helped him to achieve the success that he now can share with Kyle. He grabbed Kyle’s emergency overnight bag and a small pillow, before making his way to the kitchen. Lifting the phone off the counter he made sure everything that he needed was in his hands. The front door was locked and he made his way to the car in the driveway; leaving the messy kitchen behind him.