Waves

Chapter 4 – The Undercurrent of Regret

Eiah hadn’t expected the night to stretch into an endless loop of restlessness. When she left the pier, she thought she would find solace in the solitude of her apartment, but the memories of Dion haunted her, clinging to the corners of her mind like an unwelcome shadow.

She sat on her bed, staring at the wall across from her, her hands clutching the sheets as if they could hold her together. The silence in the room was deafening, amplifying the sound of her own thoughts. She didn’t want to think about him. She didn’t want to feel the pull of his presence, the way his words had stirred something deep within her, something she had buried for so long.

But no matter how hard she tried to push him out of her mind, he was there. Dion. The boy who had once been her everything, the boy who had made promises he couldn’t keep. The boy who had left.

Her phone buzzed again, the screen lighting up with a message from him. She hesitated, her fingers trembling as she stared at the text. She had ignored every message from him since their meeting at the pier, but this one felt different. This one felt like a plea.

Dion: “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make things worse. Can we talk?”

She swallowed hard, the lump in her throat growing larger with each passing second. She knew she shouldn’t respond. She knew that talking to him would only make things harder, would only dredge up emotions she wasn’t ready to confront. But the part of her that still loved him, the part of her that wanted to believe in him again, couldn’t resist.

With a deep breath, she typed a response.

Eiah: “Why now?”

She stared at the message for a long moment before hitting send. There was no turning back now. No matter what he said, it wouldn’t change the past. It wouldn’t change the fact that he had left her when she needed him the most.

Almost immediately, her phone buzzed again.

Dion: “I can’t stop thinking about you, Eiah. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’m asking for a chance. Just one chance to prove I’m not the same person I was before.”

The words were simple, but they cut through her like a knife. She wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe that he had changed, that he wasn’t the same boy who had disappeared without a word all those years ago. But how could she? How could she trust someone who had broken her heart once already?

The guilt began to gnaw at her. What if he was being sincere? What if he really had changed? The thought of turning him away, of closing the door for good, made her feel like she was giving up on something that had once been beautiful. She had spent so long holding on to the memory of what they had, and now that he was asking for another chance, she didn’t know if she was strong enough to say no.

Her phone buzzed again. This time, there was no message. Just a missed call.

It was from Dion.

She didn’t know how long she stared at the screen, her finger hovering over the button. Part of her wanted to ignore it. Part of her wanted to throw the phone across the room and never look at it again. But the other part of her, the part that still ached for him, reached for the phone and answered.

“Eiah?” Dion’s voice was soft, tentative, like he was afraid she might hang up at any moment. “I didn’t mean to pressure you. I just... I need to talk to you. I need you to understand why I did what I did.”

She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. “I don’t know if I can understand, Dion. I don’t know if I want to.”

“I know,” he said quickly. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’m not asking for that. I just... I need to explain. Please. Can we meet?”

Eiah’s heart raced. She had spent so long trying to move on from him, from the weight of their past, and now he was asking for another chance to explain? She didn’t know if she was ready for that, but she couldn’t deny the curiosity that burned inside her.

“Where?” she asked, her voice trembling despite her best efforts to sound calm.

“The old café,” Dion replied, his voice almost too soft to hear. “The one we used to go to. It’s still open. I’ll be waiting for you.”

Before she could respond, he hung up.

She stared at the phone for a long moment, her mind swirling with conflicting emotions. She didn’t want to go. She didn’t want to face him again, to hear the excuses, the apologies that would never be enough. But she couldn’t help herself. She had to know. She had to hear what he had to say, even if it meant opening old wounds.

The café was empty when Eiah arrived, the familiar scent of coffee and pastries filling the air. It was quieter than it had been the last time she visited, the usual chatter of patrons replaced by the soft hum of the refrigerator and the clink of dishes being cleaned.

She spotted Dion at a corner table, his back to her, his shoulders hunched as if he were waiting for something. His presence felt like a storm cloud, looming over the room, but Eiah couldn’t bring herself to turn away. She took a deep breath and walked toward him, her heart beating faster with each step.

When he heard her approach, Dion turned around, his face lighting up with a mixture of hope and uncertainty. He stood up as she reached the table, his eyes never leaving hers.

“Eiah,” he said softly. “I didn’t think you’d come.”

She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know what he expected from her, what he wanted her to feel. But the look in his eyes was enough to make her stomach twist.

“I came,” she said simply, her voice steady despite the emotions swirling inside her. “But I don’t know why. I don’t know if I can listen to you.”

Dion’s face fell, but he didn’t push her. Instead, he sat back down, gesturing for her to join him. Eiah hesitated for a moment before sitting across from him, the space between them feeling like an ocean.

“I know you don’t want to hear it,” Dion said, his voice barely above a whisper. “But I need you to know that I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted to leave. I thought about you every day, Eiah. And every day, I regretted the way I left. I thought I was doing the right thing at the time, but now I know I was wrong.”

The words were so familiar, so rehearsed, that they almost lost their meaning. She had heard these apologies before, had heard him beg for forgiveness when they were younger. But now, as an adult, as someone who had learned the hard way, she couldn’t help but feel the weight of his words press down on her.

“You’re right,” Eiah said, her voice trembling with the force of everything she had kept buried. “You were wrong. But it’s too late now, Dion. You can’t just come back and expect everything to be okay. You can’t just walk back into my life and pretend like nothing happened.”

“I don’t want to pretend,” Dion replied, his eyes desperate. “I just want to make things right. I want you to know that I’m sorry. I want you to know that I love you, Eiah. I always have.”

The words hit her like a wave, and for a moment, she didn’t know if she could breathe. The same words he had once whispered to her, the same words that had once felt like a promise, were now falling from his lips again. But this time, they didn’t feel like the sweet promises of a boy in love. This time, they felt like a weight, a burden, a reminder of everything she had lost.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Eiah whispered, her throat tight with emotion. “I can’t keep doing this to myself. I can’t keep hoping that one day you’ll come back and make everything okay.”

Dion reached across the table, his hand trembling as he tried to touch hers. “Eiah, please—”

But she pulled back, her heart breaking all over again. She couldn’t keep doing this. She couldn’t keep falling for his empty promises.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her voice barely audible. “But I think it’s time to let go.”

___________________

This is Waves—

where love drowns,

and regret floats.