S.M.S(Save My Soul)

chapter 2: Frenemy

On Sunday evening the weather drastically changed and it was raining cats and dogs but I quite enjoyed this type of weather so I told my father that I was going to get something for school even though I just wanted to enjoy the sound and smell of rain. I walked to the nearest shop with a big ass umbrella that swayed with the wind. I just bought some snacks and a file before heading home, the rain had lit up to a drizzle but it was still cloudy and dark with the street lights lighting my way.

As I turned a corner I was abruptly grabbed by the arm and my mouth was covered with a hand as I was dragged into a dark alleyway.

"Let go of me!" I screamed in the perpetrator's hand, I kicked and screamed trying to free myself for even a second. The perpetrator wasn't alone as they threw me harshly on the pavement. I groaned at the hard impact but looked up to see not two but three men tower over me with menacing smiles. I tried to memorise their faces but they wore black masks that only revealed their mouths and it was pretty dark to see them. I tried to grab anything to defend myself with but all I managed to grab was a small stick. I guess this is what you get when you walk alone at night, I mean I knew the risks of what I was doing but I've walked this street for years with no trouble even at night but I guess this was just my unlucky day.

"Stay the f**k away from me!" I yelled hoping someone will hear my cries for help but unfortunately no one came to my rescue no matter how loud I screamed and the result was inevitable.

Hands so many hands clawing at my skin leaving a burning sensation in its wake. No amount of begging, screaming or crying was heard by the attackers.

***

I hazily pried my eyes open watching droplets of rainfall from the sky as my body screamed in agony, my clothes were ripped to shreds and I had a few stab wounds depicted by the knife sticking out of my leg with bruises littering my body from my struggles. As I lay there gasping for air I thought this was the end of me and I had no one but myself to blame. This is why men scared me, to know the sheer strength they had and what bad things they could do with it terrified me. I know not all men are like this and women can be just as despicable but I just couldn't get over my fear of men and as I lay on the ground waiting for death to take me home there was only one thought running through my mind.

'I hate men with all my being'

I don't remember what happened after I passed out from loss of blood but I woke up in the hospital with wires sticking out of my arm and a burning sensation in the pits of my stomach every time I breathed, silent tears escaping my eyes as I took shallow breaths.

"Hey, welcome back to the living," A nurse said with a small smile, I groaned loudly at the impeccable pain I was in.

"Take it, easy dear. I know everything hurts now but you'll feel better after taking a few of these." She said, helping me drink some medication. I honestly couldn't handle the amount of pain I was in and I passed out because when I woke up again the pain was less and just a gentle hum reminding me it was still there.

"Hey, are you feeling any better?" The nurse from earlier asked me once I gained consciousness.

"Mhm," I hummed my throat feeling parched and sore.

"That's good," She said, writing something down on the clipboard she had in her hands, "So would you mind telling me your name, age and the last thing you remember?" She asked me.

"Uh my name's Bellenthu Khole and I'm seventeen years old," my voice was barely above a whisper, "The last thing I remember was staring at the night sky as it rained." I softly said.

"Do you remember anything before that?'' She asked me, I gritted my teeth as those memories flashed in my mind. Hands so many hands pulling and tugging at every part of my body as I begged them to stop but my voice fell on deaf ears, to answer her question yes I remembered everything just thinking about it made my skin crawl like ants were crawling all over my body it made me nauseous.

"Yes," I blatantly said, feeling a heavy weight on my chest.

"I'm so sorry you had to go through that," the nurse said, showing me pity. I didn't need pity nor have I ever needed it.

"When can I go home?" I asked desperately, fighting the tears that threatened to fall.

"Unfortunately we have to monitor you for another two days just to make sure that you're in perfect health," she sadly told me, noticing my shaking form.

"How long have I been here?" I asked her.

"Just over a day now," she told me.

"How did I end up here?" I wanted to know what happened after I passed out.

"There was a couple who heard you screaming for help on their way home, the woman ran to get help while the man stayed to defend you but unfortunately lost his life as the attackers stabbed him to death," she explained with a feeling of deep sorrow in her eyes. Even at death's door I still manage to cause trouble for people, why couldn't I have just died and the couple would be fine, now I had to live with the guilt of knowing I got someone killed.

"His wife has been waiting for you to wake up," the nurse told me, of course, the woman was waiting for me to wake up so she could kill me herself for taking her husband away from her.

"Oh," I hoarsely said, not sure what else to say, I deserved her wrath so might as well take it as an adult and face her.

"Alright, I'll let her in." She said and left the room, I couldn't look up as the door opened again.

"Hey," I heard a soft voice greet me, I quickly scanned her before we could make eye contact. She was a tall woman with emerald eyes, blond hair, fair skin and a beautiful slim figure.

"I'm Lauren, do you mind telling me your name?" She asked her voice silky smooth.

"Bellenthu or Belle if you'd prefer," I said with my head down not looking up because I couldn't look her in the eyes knowing how I ended up alive and not her husband.

"That's a beautiful name, how old are you?" She asked sitting on the bed so she could see me properly.

"I'm seventeen," I said, playing with my fingers trying to swallow the lump in my throat.

"So young, well I'm thirty-eight and my husband the one that tried to save you was Kyle he just recently turned forty," she said with silent tears streaming down her face as her lips quivered.

"Ballenthu look at me," she ordered firmly, actually saying my name right. I knew this was coming, the part where she curses my very being to hell. I timidly lifted my head to make eye contact with those emerald eyes and seeing her look so torn and scared made me feel even worse for being alive.

"Don't you dare blame yourself for this, do you understand me?" She spoke, pausing to wipe her nose and tears. Seeing her cry and speak in such a motherly tone made me break down.

"It's alright sweetheart let it all out." She held me against her in a tight hug and rubbed my back.

My mother and I didn't have much of a relationship considering she was always working but she did try to be there for me when she could, like watching movies together in the dark huddling against each other or just spending any free time she had with me so as Lauren held me it felt like those times I spend with my mother holding each other. It felt like a part of her was here which just made me cry even more. I'm not sure how long we were in each other's embrace but after we separated I felt so much better, who knew crying would be so helpful.

"I know we'll get through this, we just have to take it one day at a time," Lauren said, rubbing my tears away with her thumb. I nodded and just enjoyed the warmth she provided my stone-cold heart.

"Sorry to interrupt but your father is here Belle." The nurse told us poking her head through the door, I groaned just waiting for my dad to come in and slap the black off me for being stupid and walking alone at night.

I waited anxiously with Lauren for my dad to arrive and when he did I wanted to s**t myself. To my utter surprise, he ran to engulf me in a hug. This wasn't exactly what I was expecting so it was only natural that I would be caught off guard but I welcomed the hug with open arms.

"Thank god you're ok," he cried, actual tears ran down his cheeks, this was the second time I saw my dad cry but it was still shocking to see a man such as himself cry.

"You're crying?" I dumbly said.

"Of course he's crying his daughter nearly died," Lauren said, gaining the attention of my father who just noticed her now.

"Oh my apologies, where are my manners? I'm Nickoli Khole and who might you be?" My dad asked Lauren.

"Lauren Neeson." She answered, shaking my dad's hand.

"Are you in any way related to Liam Neeson?" My dad playfully asked, making her laugh.

"I wish but, no, just ordinary Lauren Neeson," she chuckled her laugh brightening the whole room, I think my dad was blushing with the way he was staring at Lauren in awe.

"How do you know my daughter?" He asked making the light atmosphere disappear.

"My husband and I were on our way home when we heard Belle screaming for help. When we ran to her to assess the situation my husband Kyle told me to run somewhere safe and call the cops and so I did but they arrived too late and kyle died on sight," Lauren took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself.

"I'm so sorry for your loss," my dad gently said, clearly knowing the pain of losing a spouse.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. If he could, he would do it again in a heartbeat just as long as Belle ended up alright," she said, giving me a warm smile, "I'm sure he's smiling up there knowing we're both ok." She told me squeezing my hand.

"Thank you both. I don't know how I could ever repay you but please feel free to contact me if you need help with anything," my dad said.

"Thank you, it would be nice to know the progress Belle is making," Lauren said as she exchanged numbers with my dad,

"I'll give you guys some space, give me a shout if you need me," Lauren spoke and left us alone, an awkward couple of seconds passed before my dad spoke again.

"I'm so sorry Belle," he said, hanging his head in shame. Ring the church bells and let the world stop turning. My dad just apologized to me for the first time in his life, this was a true miracle.

"Sorry for what exactly? It's not like you didn't warn me about going out late," I said flatly.

"I can't handle losing you two Belle, just the thought scares me shitless, sorry for swearing," he muttered the last part under his breath.

"I'm not a kid anymore I've heard worse," I said, making him raise an eyebrow.

"Right teenagers, just know I love you kiddo and I'm sorry for being such a shitty dad these past couple of months but ever since Thereasa died I've just been spiralling into a dark void and I think it's time I finally got some help. I promise I'll get better and we'll be a family again." He desperately said squeezing my hands. Well look at that all it took was my near-death for him to want to change, so not all bad came from this situation.

"Talk is cheap dad, show me you want to change then I'll believe you," I told my dad straightforward not falling for the whole I'll change bullshit, tell it on an AA meeting, not to me.

He nodded and gave me another bone-crushing hug.

"Ok easy on the hug," I grunted repeatedly tapping his back to let me go.

"I love you don't you ever forget that," he muttered on my shoulder, I froze hearing his voice break as he held me. I could hear he meant every word and of course that tugged at my heartstrings but it wasn't going to be that easy to gain my love and trust and I think he knew that so he wasn't expecting anything in return. Once I started feeling uncomfortable in his hold I gently pushed him away from me.

"Sorry." He sniffed sitting back to give me my space as I felt goosebumps litter my body.

"It's fine," I muttered, wringing my hands, not sure what to say in the awkward silence.

"I'll let you rest, I'll be outside if you need me." He said, getting up and giving me one last longing look before leaving the room. I sighed, feeling like a weight has been lifted off my chest.

The two days I had to wait in the hospital went by with a breeze with my dad and Lauren constantly being by my side even though I told them I was fine but they kept nagging me like the worried parents that they were. By Wednesday I was charged with a prescription for medicine I must take. I was doing fine with the occasional ache in my abdominal area every time I put too much pressure when I walked.

"Belle please don't you think it's too soon to go back to school?" My dad argued the next day as I got ready to head to school.

"No better time than the present," I said packing my bag in my room while my dad stood by the doorway with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

"I still think this is a horrible idea," he grumbled.

"That's your opinion but I'm going either way," I told him as I slung my bag on my shoulder grabbing my water bottle and took my phone. I could still feel that ache all over my body whenever I moved but it was easily forgettable.

"Then let me drop you at least," he offered worriedly.

"Fine, let's go then," I sighed, getting impatient with his concern.

"Did you eat?" He asked, grabbing his keys by the door.

"Don't make me leave you here and walk." I coldly said getting into the car.

"The doctor did say you have to eat before taking your medication." He said, giving me a side glance as he backed the car out of the garage.

"I did eat," I said only cereal but it was something at least.

"Good and if you feel like coming home don't hesitate to call me I'll come to pick you up at that very second," he sounded truly concerned for me and that annoyed me because why now? Why did it take my sudden near death for him to change?

"Mhm," I hummed looking out the window as we neared my school.

"Bye," He said once I got out the door.

"Bye," I lazily waved and headed into school.

The noise and bustling of students set me on high alert as my eyes randomly wandered all over the place eyeing every male student like they would pounce on me any second. I never truly realised how many built male students we had in my class till now. I quickly walked to my locker dodging everyone in the way like trying to walk through a landmine.

"Lookie who's back," I heard Anji's voice say behind me sending a chill up my spine, my heart went practically off the roof as my hands shook.

Her proximity didn't help me much as I felt the walls close around me and darkness consume everything till I was back in that dark alley staring at those masked figures trying to hold onto whatever little dignity I had left. I tried to stay calm to remember that I was at school and not in that alley but my brain wouldn't listen to me, so I tried to do a little breathing exercise but I couldn't. I forgot how even to breathe.

"What the hell's wrong with you?" I heard Anji's voice echo around the alley like I was in a cave, her voice brought me back to the present and I realised I was on the floor with tears streaming down my face. Anji was staring down at me with a hint of concern but quickly hid it as we locked eyes, I quickly wiped away my tears and shakily stood up trying to hide my earlier freakout.

"Nothing," I muttered, closing my locker and walking to my class. No matter how bad I wanted to go home and crawl into my bed and never come out again, I knew I couldn't do that because if I did I knew I wouldn't come back here again I'd just send myself into a spiral of darkness. So I sucked it up and stayed in school.

I sat at the back of class not wanting to gain any more attention. Unfortunately, little miss perfect sat right next to me with her squad surrounding me.

I sighed and waited for the teacher to come and when he did everyone found their seats and class began. He was writing some notes on the board and told us to copy them into our books. I took my pen to write but my hand began to shake and no matter how hard I tried to steady it nothing worked.

"Son of a b***h," I cursed as I got hit hard on the back of my head. I turned to Anji who had a satisfied look on her face as she watched me rub my head with my hand.

"The hell's wrong with you?" I angrily asked.

"Your hand isn't shaking anymore," she said, looking at my right hand that I was rubbing my head with. True to her word it wasn't shaking but I was still pissed at her little stunt.

"f**k you." I spat and got back to writing grateful for my steady hand.

"Pay very close attention everyone this will be on the test," our teacher spoke firmly, turning around to stare at us. His broad form reminded me of one of the guys I saw in the alleyway and that just brought unwanted memories to the forefront of my mind.

"You b***h," I cried again as Anji slapped my head again, "What is your problem?" I asked furiously.

"I have no problem at all," she smiled happily, watching me frown in discomfort. I gritted my teeth and carried on writing, forgetting about my earlier thoughts and shaking hands.