A Love Left Behind

Chapter 22 - What I Wanted

For most of my childhood, everyone assumed I would eventually work for the family business, like everyone in the family.

Nobody asked.

They didn't have to.

The company was simply there.

Grandpa had built it. Grandma had built it with him. Mum worked there. Victor led it. Vincent was involved. Kaelob would probably join eventually.

So naturally, Rose would too.

There was only one problem.

I didn't want to.

I realized that sometime during my final years of school.

“What do you mean, you don't know?”

Kaelob was lying across the sofa at our grandparents' house while I sat on the floor with university information spread around me.

“I mean I don't know.”

“You have to apply for something.”

“Thank you. Very helpful.”

He picked up one of the brochures.

“Business.”

“No.”

“Finance.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Management.”

I stared at him.

“Do you know me at all?”

He laughed.

“What do you want to do?”

That was harder.

“I want to travel.”

“That's not a career.”

“I know.”

“You could become a flight attendant.”

I threw a brochure at him.

He caught it.

“Travel blogger?”

“Shut up.”

“Professional German boyfriend visitor?”

I threw another one.

This time he didn't catch it.

Grandma walked into the room.

“Why are you throwing things?”

“Kaelob is annoying.”

“He was annoying before you were born.”

“Thank you, Grandma.”

“You're welcome.”

She looked at the papers around me.

“University?”

I nodded.

“What are you choosing?”

“I don't know.”

She sat beside me.

Unlike everyone else, Grandma didn't immediately start suggesting things.

“What do you like?”

I thought about it.

“People.”

Kaelob snorted.

I kicked his foot.

Grandma ignored us.

“What else?”

“Places. Languages. Learning about how people live.”

“Then find something that gives you more of that.”

I looked at her.

“What about the company?”

“What about it?”

“Everyone expects me to work there.”

“Did I say that?”

“No.”

“Did your grandfather?”

“No.”

“Then everyone can mind their own business.”

I smiled.

That was Grandma.

She and Grandpa had spent decades building something successful, but neither of them believed their grandchildren owed it their lives.

“You should build something of your own,” she said.

“A company?”

“A life.”

I never forgot that.

For the first time, I started imagining a future that wasn't already waiting for me.

Maybe university somewhere else.

Maybe Manila.

Maybe another country one day.

Maybe Germany.

That last one frightened me enough that I didn't say it out loud.

Damian and I had been together long enough that imagining him in my future no longer felt ridiculous.

We still hadn't figured out what that future looked like.

But sometimes we tried.

“Come to Germany for university,” he said during a video call.

I laughed.

“Just like that?”

“Yes.”

“You've solved it?”

“Apparently.”

“What would I study?”

“Something.”

“Excellent university advice.”

“You could study near me.”

“That's your entire plan?”

“Yes.”

“What if I hate Germany?”

“You already hate Germany.”

“Exactly.”

“You can hate it from closer.”

I laughed.

Then he became quieter.

“I'd like you here.”

That did something to me.

Damian didn't make big promises.

That was one of the things I loved about him.

So when he said something simple, I believed him.

“I'd like to see it,” I said.

“Germany?”

“Your life.”

He smiled.

“One day.”

One day.

We used those words a lot.

At home, Mum was less enthusiastic about my uncertainty.

Not because she expected me to join the business.

Because uncertainty made her nervous.

“You need options.”

“I have options.”

“You have brochures.”

“Those are literally options.”

“Rose.”

“Mum.”

She sighed.

Kaelob walked through the kitchen, saw us and immediately turned around.

“Coward!” I shouted after him.

“Yes!”

Mum tried not to laugh.

She failed.

Those were the arguments I remember fondly now.

The ones where nobody was actually afraid.

The ones that ended with dinner.

Around that time, Ellie started visiting Mum more often.

Sometimes they talked about the children.

Sometimes school.

Sometimes money.

One afternoon, I came home and found them at the kitchen table.

Ellie looked upset.

Mum had documents in front of her.

“You're fine,” Mum said. “There's enough.”

“That's not the point.”

“What is?”

Ellie hesitated.

Then she noticed me.

“Hi, Rose.”

“Hi.”

Mum gathered the papers.

“Give us a minute.”

I went upstairs.

I didn't think about it again until later that night when I heard Mum and Kaelob talking.

“What did Aunt Ellie want?” he asked.

“Nothing.”

“Mum.”

“Vincent has some expenses.”

“What kind?”

“Children are expensive.”

Kaelob laughed.

“He created enough of them.”

“Don't be rude.”

“It's true.”

Mum sighed.

“We'll help.”

Of course we would.

That was what our family did.

The next Sunday, Ellie hugged Mum when she arrived at Grandma and Grandpa's house.

“Thank you.”

Mum waved it away.

“Stop.”

“I mean it.”

“You don't have to.”

Leyla was standing nearby.

She smiled.

“How lucky Vincent has a sister who controls the money.”

The room didn't become silent.

Nobody gasped.

Mum didn't even look offended.

She laughed.

“I don't control anything.”

Leyla tilted her head.

“You know what I mean.”

Victor walked past and kissed his wife's cheek.

“What are you talking about?”

“Nothing important.”

And just like that, it was gone.

Except Ellie had heard it.

So had Vincent.

So had I.

Later, I found Leyla and Ellie together near the garden.

I couldn't hear everything.

Only pieces.

“…not saying Alice would ever…”

Then Ellie's voice.

“I know.”

Leyla again.

“…your children…”

I stopped walking.

There was something about hearing those words together that made me uncomfortable.

I stepped closer.

Leyla saw me.

She smiled immediately.

“Rose.”

The conversation stopped.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

That word again.

Nothing.

I'd spent enough time with Damian to know that nothing usually meant something.

Ellie smiled at me too.

But hers looked different.

Nervous.

“What were you talking about?”

“The children,” Leyla said.

“Whose?”

“Vincent's.”

“Why?”

Leyla laughed.

“So many questions.”

Then she touched my arm and walked back toward the house.

Ellie followed.

I stood there for a moment.

For the first time, I didn't forget.

That evening, I told Mum.

“Leyla and Aunt Ellie were talking about you.”

Mum barely looked up from her laptop.

“They talk about everyone.”

“No. About the company. And Vincent's children.”

That got her attention.

“What did they say?”

“I don't know. They stopped when they saw me.”

Mum sighed.

“Rose, don't start listening to private conversations.”

“I wasn't.”

“You clearly were.”

“I heard your name.”

“And?”

“And it sounded weird.”

Mum closed the laptop.

“Leyla likes to talk.”

“You don't like her.”

“I didn't say that.”

“You didn't have to.”

Mum smiled slightly.

Damian would have liked that answer.

“She's Victor's wife,” Mum said. “Victor loves her.”

“That isn't the same as you liking her.”

“No.”

I waited.

Mum looked toward the window.

Then she said something I didn't expect.

“Your grandmother never trusted her.”

“Why?”

“She never said.”

“Do you?”

Mum looked at me.

It took her too long to answer.

“I trust my brother.”

At seventeen, that sounded almost like the same thing.

Years later, I would understand the difference.

Grandma already did.

A few days later, I went to see her.

I didn't intend to ask about Leyla.

But we were alone, sorting vegetables in the kitchen, when I suddenly did.

“Why don't you trust Aunt Leyla?”

Grandma's hands stopped.

Only for a second.

“Who told you that?”

“Mum.”

Grandma sighed.

“She shouldn't have.”

“So it's true.”

She continued cutting.

“Your aunt is part of this family.”

“That isn't an answer.”

“No.”

I waited.

Grandma finally looked at me.

“Some people enter a family because they want to belong to it.”

My stomach tightened.

“And Leyla?”

Grandma returned to the vegetables.

“I didn't say anything about Leyla.”

“Grandma.”

She smiled.

“Help me with those.”

Conversation over.

At the time, I thought she was being unfair.

Maybe protective.

Maybe one of those mothers who never believed anyone was good enough for her oldest son.

I didn't know Grandma had been watching Leyla much longer than I had.

I didn't know she had noticed things before the rest of us.

And I certainly didn't know that by the time I finally started asking questions, Leyla had already spent years learning exactly where our family could be broken.

She knew Victor needed to feel respected.

She knew Vincent worried about providing for his children.

She knew Ellie could be frightened more easily for her children than for herself.

She knew Mum had access to every number that mattered.

And she knew John and Mary believed their children would never turn against one another.

Leyla didn't need to destroy that belief herself.

She only needed to make us question it.

One person at a time.

That night, Damian sent me a message.

Damian: Dad confirmed it.

I stared at the screen.

Me: Confirmed what?

Damian: Philippines. Next summer.

Everything else disappeared.

Leyla.

The company.

The strange conversations.

All of it.

Me: You're coming back?

Damian: I'm coming back.

I smiled so hard my face hurt.

I had almost a year to wait.

It felt impossible.

But there was something else too.

By the time Damian came back, we wouldn't be sixteen anymore.

We were growing up.

Our families were changing.

And without realizing it, so were the things waiting for us when we saw each other again.