My Heart Is Yours

Chapter 31

"Can I call you RJ instead?"

"What?" Richard stared at her. His eyes were wide in surprise.

"I'm sorry," Maine stammered. "It was silly of me. It won't – "

"No!" He cut her off. "RJ...RJ's fine. I don't mind. I actually prefer it even. I was just surprised. That's all."

"Really?"

"Yes," he replied with a smile that showed how deep his dimple was. It was like Alden's. "So please, call me RJ."

"Okay," she smiled in reply. "RJ it is."

Maine looked at him and noticed a different sparkle in Richard's eyes when she called him "RJ". But she couldn't place what it was.

Richard felt his heart leap with joy. 'Could she actually have been aware of my presence before?' He thought of that night in the hospital room. It gave him hope.

Still smiling, he said, "let's go. I remember parking my car at the west parking."

"You don't remember where you parked?" Maine stifled a giggle.

"It's been five days," he explained but he smirked. "I'm trying to get my bearings. I did fly a 747 awhile ago. Twelve hours ago to be exact."

"Point taken," she remarked. "Lead the way, RJ."

Richard gave her a strange look before smiling once more and led her to the parking lot. They walked in silence for a while before one of them spoke up.

"I never really got the chance to thank you," Maine started.

"Thank me?" Richard answered as he fumbled in his pocket to open the locks to his car.

"For yesterday," she replied. "You helped me up when I fainted."

He stopped and turned to face her before replying, "I was the reason you fainted in the first place."

He opened the passenger door for her first and made sure she got in before taking their luggage to put in the trunk. He then made his way to the driver side.

"Still," she insisted when he got in. "Thank you, RJ."

He gave her that same look he gave a while ago. Then he shook his head and smiled. He started the car and they were on their way.

"Why do you always give me that look when I call you 'RJ'?" Maine inquired after a few moments of silence.

"Rich was the only other person who called me 'RJ'," Richard admitted after a few seconds. "Everybody else including our parents calls me 'Jase'. The same token that I am the only one who called him 'Rich' while the rest of the world called him 'Alden'. It feels strange that someone else would use it. But really, I don't mind. I just need to get used to it, that's all. Besides, you might not remember but I did say that you can call me 'RJ' if you wanted."

Maine recalled her dream once again and was glad to know that it was a memory. She must have been in and out of consciousness that time. But she didn't voice it out loud.

"But why 'Jase'?" She asked instead.

"It's my second name," he answered nonchalantly. "I mean, Rich and I are both Richard, it would be confusing to the both of us if people called us that. Why?"

"Sorry," Maine said. "RJ suits you better. You don't look like a 'Jase' to me."

"I don't look like a 'Jase'?" Richard inquired, an eyebrow raised in question. "What does a 'Jase' look like anyway?"

"I don't know," Maine shrugged. "Blond, golden eyes, have tattoos all over his body..."

"Great," Richard muttered. "I'm being compared to a TV character."

"If you're going for the live-action version," Maine retorted with a grimace. "Go for the movie version. He was way hotter in the movie version."

"It's the hair, right?" He guessed. "Chicks dig the long hair."

"No," she answered. "It was the accent. British accents have always been sexy for me."

"So, you like British English?" Richard remarked with his own attempt of a British accent but failing miserably. Maine laughed and after a few seconds he joined in.

"That was terrible!" Maine exclaimed after she'd calm down.

"I know," he answered, his own laughter subsiding. "Don't make me do it again."

They sat in silence for a time while Richard drove the length of the expressway. Maine peered at him from time to time, looking at him as if trying to decide what to do.

"I know you have questions," Richard finally said, breaking the silence. "So, ask away. It's still about an hour drive back home. So we have plenty of time."

-oo-

Maine took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She was trying to get her mind in order. There were indeed so many questions in her mind. She started with the obvious one.

"Why didn't Alden tell me about you?" She asked. "I mean, even Tita Rio never mentioned you."

There was a sad smile as Richard replayed the memory of his childhood. He slowly replied, "it was an attempt to rebel. When our parents were separated, they separated us as well. I went to dad while Rich went to mom. Since Rich and I didn't like the arrangement, we decided that since our parents only wanted one child with them, they will have only one child. So we never brought up each other in front of our parents. We didn't even talk to them when Rich and I chatted on YM. We cut them off every time they try to ask about us or even mention our name. It got to the extent that to keep the facade of an only child, we also never mention each other to our friends. How we managed to hide the presence of the other during visitations was a feat we've managed to do, but wondered how we did it all these years. Visitations were the only times we let them acknowledged us as twins."

Maine kept silent as she tried to absorb his story. It seemed sad to her that the twins had endured being separated and then not mentioned each other in public. She wondered how Alden was before she came into his life. He must have needed her as much as she needed him that time. And what about RJ? How did he cope with not having Alden with him 24/7?

"We wanted to bring you into the fold so to speak," Richard continued as he reminisced . "The plan was he would introduce me to you on the summer when Rich was supposed to graduate. We've thought of a lot of different scenarios of how to pull a prank on you but we were thinking of your condition, so every idea was tossed out the window. We ended up deciding to just show up at your front door with Rich introducing me to you. I was really excited back then."

Maine saw the sudden sadness in his eyes and she felt a pang in her chest. She knew what happened next. She didn't want him to continue.

"You talked about me a lot?" She inquired, trying to change the subject.

Richard took a quick glance at her and gave her a sad smile. He replied, "all the time. Eversince he'd met you, he wouldn't stop talking about you. It was like I was there when he told his stories. He would talk about your walks and what you guys did when you hung out. I would just close my eyes and imagine that I was there with you guys."

"How much do you know about me?" She asked.

"Everything you've told him," he answered.

"I miss him," Maine suddenly said. "It was so different when he was gone. I couldn't imagine how it was for you."

Without thinking she reached out and placed her hand on top of Richard's hand that was holding the gear shift. Richard darted his eyes to their hands and then towards her, eyes wide in surprise. But he smiled and replied, "it wasn't easy. We used to talk everyday and it was so strange not talking to anyone on YM anymore.

"I also lost my window to you. I wanted to stay and help you get through the grief but I had school. And our parents thought it best for us not to meet yet, since you might mistake me for him and it would be unfair to Rich's memory."

His eyes became sad once more as he relived the past. Maine kept her hand on top of his for support.

"I was really pissed off with that decision," Richard continued. She felt his hand tightened the hold on the gear shift. "I just lost my brother. Now, I was going to lose you as well and we haven't even met. All those years I've wondered how you were. How were you coping? Who was with you throughout all that? Have you been taking your maintenance regularly? How was your experience of going to school for the first time? How was your farm doing? Were you still playing that game?"

He paused for a while as they entered the exit. Then he went on, "I was closed off from all of that, I felt like I was going crazy. Rich would be furious with me for not keeping tabs. But how could I? I couldn't even approach you. The last eight years were the most miserable years of my life."

Maine felt a stab on her chest as if she also felt his pain. She felt like she had been cheated by Fate because she would have had Richard when she was grieving over Alden. She knew the pain he was feeling when he lost his brother. It was the same pain she felt.

"I'm annoyed with my parents now that they think I wouldn't handle meeting you well," she said instead. Trying to lighten the mood.

Richard smiled and shook his head.

"Nope," he replied. "I think they were right."

"How could you say that?" Maine remarked in a huff.

"You did faint yesterday when you saw me," he took a sidelong glance at her and chuckled.

Maine tried to make a retort but couldn't find any words to make a comeback. She just shook her head and laughed softly.

They've reached their subdivision and their street. Richard parked the car inside their garage first before assisting Maine and accompanied her to their front gate. He noticed that the house was dark.

"No one's home?" He inquired as he saw Maine rummaging through her bag for the keys.

"I wasn't supposed to be home this early, remember?" Maine explained. "I just left the other day. I knew my parents wouldn't be home today. They visited some relatives in Bulacan. I guess they brought Ate Vangie with them too."

"Will you be fine on your own?" He asked, concern etched on his face. He didn't want Maine to be alone. "I'm sure mom wouldn't mind if you stayed at our home while your parents are gone."

"I'm not twelve, RJ," Maine chuckled even though she was really touched by his concern. She suddenly remembered Alden, and her laughter died down. "Don't worry about me. I can take care of myself."

"Hand me your phone," he said as he reached out his hand, waiting for her to give her phone. She sighed and handed him her phone after unlocking it. He typed something and then made a call. When she heard another phone ringing, he ended the call and handed her back her phone.

"My number's on your phonebook," Richard stared. "If you need anything. Anything at all, don't hesitate to give me a call or text or any type of messaging app that you have. Just, don't hesitate. I'll be there. I'll come running with mom's ice cream. Rich mentioned how you used to love it."

Maine giggled and replied, "I still love it! And I can't wait to have some too! But not tonight. Maybe tomorrow...after I've slept for more than 3-hours."

Richard smiled and nodded. Maine was about to head inside when he called her again. She turned back to face him once more.

"We haven't formally been introduced," Richard said his bedimpled smile, as he reached out his hand to her. "Hi Maine. I'm RJ. Rich's twin."

"Hi RJ," she giggled as she took the outstretched hand and shook it. "It's finally good to meet you."