LAYERS OF LOVE (LOL)

Behind him

I do my best to avoid the gaze of the man behind him. I can already tell that I am failing terribly because my eyes keep meeting his and for another moment I thank God for the pesky lazy eye that he put in my sockets because thankfully my soon to be husband would have already noticed. I can fell his eyes, both their eyes on me but his burn stronger. It sounds like a little reminder that it don't matter what I think or do, even with the vows that I am about to say I will still be his.

When my fiance, Pascal, and I were deciding on who we wanted as a best man and maid of honor We thought it wise to have a best couple, a man and his wife. He had insisted on Rosa and Vincent, no matter how hard I tried to throw him off course. Here I am now under the scrutiny of Vincent, trying my darndest to pretend that this is the only encounter we have of being close. I look up at him and a shadow of a smile forms on his face before he looks past me, I assume at his wife. For a moment I feel like I can breath again.I take a little moment to compose myself, smiling broadly at my husband as the officiator tells us to get going with our vows.

"Every breath I am taking today feels surreal. It's like what I prayed for has now been placed into my hands and I cannot be more thankful. Now I know two shall become one but in our case we got one more, God, to be standing in between us so three shall make one. Peris from this moment onward, you are my life. The breath in my very lungs. What I mean is that I am offering you my entire existence. I will love you with all entirety, I will be faithful and trustworthy and I cannot forget to open doors for you my love. I love you, always and forever." Oh Pascal. The man knows exactly what to say to appease my heart. In the moment as I listen to the lovely vows, I know for a fact that I did not go wrong choosing him over the others. I feel my face stretch into a smile and I know it is the first smile that isn't nervous since the day started. I see my sight clouding reminding me that I do not want to get caught up in the moment. His eyes are trained on me and I can feel them but this time they burn. I know why. He is waiting to hear what I am going to say to my darling Pascal. I smile again but this time for a different reason.

"Pascal, if I was asked to craft for myself love, I'd craft it with hazel eyes, an enticing smile and a big heart, all inside a tall body. I'd craft it as you. When my father taught me what love is, he described it as first Corinthians chapter thirteen, verse four through to eight. Here's what he said, 'take your lovers name and replace love with it and if hee's all those things then he is the one'. You are my one, and I choose you," I avert my eyes to look slightly at the man behind him. "forsaking all others. I love you always and forever."

I look at Vincent for a while as an emotion I cannot trace passes through his face. I smirk before turning to my fiance only to see eyes filled with love and awe. This man is going to be the death of me. I can feel all the eyes on my back and the two sets infront of me. I ignore one and focus on the other. With a huge smile I go through with the ceremony. I can see all of them there and even when I kiss him and dance with him, I feel them looking at me. I know why but I choose to ignore it. Today I am getting married not worrying about things.

Immediately after the first dance VIncent steals me away and his wife starts dancing with my new husband. I am hyper aware of his hand on the low of my back. My heart immediately picks up the pace, a normal reaction with him. He pulls me closer and places both his hands on my waist while out of sheer instinct my hands go round his neck. I nervously lay my head on his chest loving the comfort that comes with that. I can feel his breath tickling my ear, the smell of booze reeking through even though not so strongly. He chuckles a little as I try my best not to nuzzle closer to him.

"Darling, I miss you too but not here." He whispers as the turns me around to face our dancing partners among other people dancing on the floor. I can feel the heat emanating from his body and the sweet musky scent of his coating my nostrils till I can't breath any longer. This man is very well able to make my breath hitch at every moment. As he turns us around my blood runs cold as I see the others. None of them knows the other yet they all know I am now married. An intentional move because I do not want to struggle with having to answer calls at midnight and explain to my husband. I am not a liar. I just omit truths. With the jealousy in the two pairs of eyes becoming more palpable I wish to disappear into Vincent's comforting arms.

"Are you okay?" He asks sensing the discomfort.

"I need a drink if I'm going to finish this day without falling off the wagon." I whisper to which he whisks me away to the bar. The good thing about it is that he is friends with Pascal therefore not a big deal if we are together at the bar. We get our drinks and I excuse myself from the ceremony. Having changed into a simple midnight gown I seem to blend in seamlessly as I escape my own wedding. I'm almost outside when someone holds my hand. They are familiar yet different fingers that wrap around my upper arm.

"Escaping your own family beautiful?" The velvety sound that comes from the man tells me exactly who it is even without me seeing him. I stop for a moment before I sigh and move on in my path knowing very well that he is going to follow. Immediately I am out of the crowded hall I take a gulp of air but its not long before a brutal kiss falls on my lips and it is gone even before I can register it. So is the man. From the blond hair cruising down at the end of the corridor I can tell exactly who it is. I place my fingers on my lips trying to register what has just happened before taking a gulp from my drink.