Her Trauma, His Redemption

Chapter 29: Questions he was afraid to ask

Jake hadn't slept. Not really.

He had watched her sleep for most part of the night making sure she was really breathing. He had watched her whimper each time he pulled back. Watched as her tears flowed even in her sleep.

The words make it stop still echoed in his head.

He had wanted to. He had really wanted to make it all stop. He just didn't know how, so all he did was hold her, stroke her hair and lull her back to sleep each time she whimpered.

That morning, he sat on his small table at his private study just after dawn, jacket discarded, sleeves rolled up, a cup of coffee untouched and cooling beside him.

The house was quiet again. Too quiet after the sounds Tiana had made the night before.

Her cries and screams still echoed in his head.

He'd held her through it. Counted her breaths. Grounded her until the panic loosened its grip.

She had cried herself into exhaustion against his chest, fingers fisting his shirt like she was afraid he might disappear if she let go.

And he had sworn again that nothing would ever hurt her.

But this... this wasn't something he could shoot, threaten, torture or lock out with guards. This was something that lived with her, inside and he couldn't torture it without harming her.

A soft knock sounded at the door.

"Come in," Jake said voice rough.

Marco stepped inside already dressed for the day, medical bag slung over one shoulder.

His expression shifted the moment he saw Jake.

"You look like hell, " Marco said plainly.

Jake didn't argue, he felt like hell, like he had lived through it."She had another panic attack. "

Marco set the bag down slowly."I guessed as much. Maya filled me in. "

Jake exhaled through his nose jaw tightening. "I need to know what we are doing. All of it. No sugarcoating. "

Marco studied him for a long moment then pulled out a chair and sat."Okay, " he said. "Then let's talk honestly. "

Jake leaned forward arms braced on the table. "I left her in the room for ten minutes to take a call from Mark only to come back and see her on the floor choking and trying to breathe, clawing at her throat. She didn't know where she was and kept begging someone to stop. She kept apologising like it was her fault. I don't think she even knew what she was saying. "His voice cracked, just slightly.

"I can handle nightmares, Marco, " he continued. "I can hold her through them. But I don't know how many times she's had to survive this before me and I don't know how to fix it." The thought of her going through that alone had kept Jake awake as he watched her.

He had imagined her choking, clawing at her throat, screaming. That too alone. With no one to tell her it was okay. With no one to hold her through it.

That thought killed him at the same added fire to what he already felt. The urge to protect.

Marco's tone softened. "You don't fix trauma, Jake. You treat it.You walk through it. "

Jake clenched his fists. "Then tell me how."

Marco nodded once. "What she is experiencing is normal for someone with complex trauma. Panic attacks, nightmares, dissociation. Her nervous system is still convinced she is in danger. "

"She isn't, " Jake said sharply.

"I know, " Marco replied calmly. "You know. Her body doesn't yet. "

Jake leaned back running a hand through his hair. "So what's the plan?"

Marco opened his bag and pulled out a thin folder. "As I told you before at the hospital, she is going to need therapy. Lots of it. So I've already contacted two trauma specialists. Both discreet. Both experienced with survivors of prolonged abuse. "

Jake's eyes flickered to the folder

"You trust them ?"

"With my license and with her. "

That mattered.

Jake nodded. "When does it start?"

"Not immediately, " Marco said gently. "She needs stabilisation first. Therapy too soon can retraumatise if she doesn't feel safe and grounded. "

Jake's chest tightened "So we wait?"

"No," Marco said. "We prepare. " He ticked the steps off on his fingers. "First- routine. Predictability, meals at the same time.Your presence helps more than you realise, because somehow her body and everything in her already trusts you."

Jake thought of the way her breathing slowed when she felt his heartbeat. "I'm not going anywhere. "

"I know. " Marco said. "Second- control. She is going to need choices. Even small ones. What room she is in. When she sleeps. Who touches her."

Jake nodded slowly. "Maya already put rules in place."

Marco smiled faintly. "Good woman. "

"Third, " Marco continued. "Coping tools. Breathing exercises. Grounding techniques. We'll practice them during the day so she can use them at night. "

Jake swallowed."And medication?"

Marco hesitated. "If needed. Low dose, short term only if the panic becomes unmanageable. "

Jake's jaw flexed. "I don't want her numb. "

"I wouldn't allow that, "Marco said firmly. "The goal is healing not silencing. "

Silence stretched between them then Jake asked the question he'd been avoiding. "Will she ever be... normal?"

Marco didn't answer right away, Instead he asked. "What does normal mean to you?"

Jake stared at the table. "Sleeping without fear, being touched without flinching. Not waking up thinking she is about to die. "

Marco's voice was quiet. "Then yes. In time. With work. With support. "

Jake looked up sharply. "You're sure?"

"I'm hopeful ," Marco said honestly. "And hope is realistic here."

Jake let out a slow breath, some of the iron in his chest loosening.

"What about me?" He asked suddenly. "What do I do when I'm the one triggering something without meaning to.?"

Marco met his gaze steadily. "You listen. You apologise when needed. And you don't make her fear about your guilt."

That one landed hard. Jake nodded once. "I hate that my men-" Marco held up a hand.

"We've been over this, they got the wrong girl. And what's happening with her now runs deeper than what your men did. But you're responsible for what happens next. "

Jake's voice dropped. "Then I'll do this right. "

"I believe you, " Marco said.

"One more thing, " Jake waited. "You can't protect her by controlling everything. "Marco said carefully. "Safety doesn't mean isolation. It means trust. "

Jake thought of the way she'd faced the bed. The way she'd chosen to stay instead of run. How proud he had been of her.

"She stronger than she knows. " Jake murmured.

Marco smiled."And you are finally letting her be. "

A soft sound from the hallway made them both turn. Tiana stood there wrapped in a cardigan, hair loose around her shoulders.

She looked smaller than usual but calmer. "I didn't mean to listen," she said quietly.

Jake was at his feet in an instant. "Hey, it's okay. "

She stepped inside, eyes flicking between them. "You were talking about me. "

Marco rose offering her a warm smile. "Only good things Mrs Valerian. "

Tiana smiled shyly at that.

Jake reached for her hand, grounding both of them. "We're making a plan, " he said softly. "One that doesn't hurt you. "

Her fingers tightened around his. "I don't want to ne fixed. "

Marco nodded approving. "Good. Because you are not broken. "

Tiana's eyes filled but she didn't cry, she just took a deep breath.

"I want to heal, " she said.

Jake squeezed her hand. "Then we'll heal together. "

That sentence made healing feel like they could walk through it step by step.