The devil you begged for

014

ISLA

~•~

I was glad when the night was finally over. I spent hours awake, rolling in bed, thinking about what transpired between me and Lorenzo, wondering what my future looked like with or without him in it. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do about him yet but I knew I couldn’t keep letting him control me like that.

The taste of the food from the previous night lingered in my mouth after my various attempts to throw it all up.

The morning after was easier. Just as instructed, I went down for breakfast. I wasn’t trying to give in to him but I was wise enough to know when not to fight him. He didn’t seem like a person with a heart and things could get very ugly very quickly if I didn’t cooperate with him.

Thankfully, he wasn’t around. He had gone out early in the morning for work, which made it easier for me to stomach food. I didn’t really want to eat, but his men were watching me carefully. I knew as much as I did that they were going to report to their boss.

When I was finally dropped off at school, I let out a small sigh of relief.

The campus buzzed like nothing had gone wrong. People laughed, hurried across the halls with coffees in their hands, some dragging themselves half asleep to their classes. Everyone was living a normal life, except me. No matter how bad things got for me, life went on. Born into a mafia family, my life had always been far from normal, but after losing my parents, it was even worse.

I had to get stronger. I had to defeat the man who thought it was fun to toy with my life. I couldn’t let him win. If he decided to get rid of me, barely anyone would notice my absence. School would go on as usual. Lectures would happen. Time wouldn’t stop for someone as insignificant as me, which meant I had to fight for myself.

“Boo!”

I jumped, turning around with my hand on my chest. I let out a sigh when I saw that it was just Sofia. “You scared me.”

She smiled easily. “That was the point.” Her blonde curls bounced as she jogged towards me. When I didn’t return her smile, it dropped. “What’s up? You don’t look good.”

My tongue poked the inside of my cheek. Of course, I didn’t look good. How could I look good when I didn’t sleep all night, scared that Lorenzo would suddenly enter my room? How could I look good when I had to force myself to eat dinner last night and then, breakfast this morning? How could I look good when I was being controlled by the very man who killed my family?

Then again, I couldn’t say all that. While she knew of the existence of the mafia, she hadn’t seen or experienced anything about it. She didn’t know what my family used to do. She didn’t know who I was. I couldn’t drag her into my messy world. The less she knew, the better for her.

I forced out a smile. “It’s our last semester. Does anyone look good?”

“It’s obviously more than that, Isla. You look tense.”

Sofia and I had been friends since the second year of college. She lived in a different country, which meant she was only around during school sessions. We were close enough for her to tell me her secrets but my secrets were too big to share. It wasn’t like I didn’t trust her. I didn’t want to put her in trouble.

“I’m fine,” I forced out.

“You’ve been saying that since you came back to school,” she pointed out. “If it’s because of your parents, you know you can talk to me, right?”

“I said I’m fine.” My voice came out sharper than I intended and I instantly regretted it when I saw her face fall.

Before I could take back my words, another voice cut in.

“Well, good morning to you, Isla.”

I didn’t need to look to know that it was Ryan. Oftentimes than not, he was standing by my locker, waiting for me to arrive at school. He’d been trying to get my attention since the beginning of the school year. It had been almost six months but it seemed like giving up wasn’t in his dictionary.

“You look like you could use a coffee,” he added when I didn’t say anything and merely opened my locker. “Lucky for you, I’m an expert at that.” His older brother ran a cafe and he never failed to talk about it whenever he had the chance.

Sofia rolled her eyes, hopefully already forgotten about our interaction. “Don’t you ever give up?”

“Nope,” he said easily, flashing her a smile. “Persistence is a virtue.”

“Or an annoyance,” I added, dumping all my books in the locker and only taking the one I needed at that moment. I barely used the locker, but now, I was grateful to have it. I didn’t have any secrets yet but if I did, I could store them there instead of Lorenzo’s home. “I’m not interested,” I focused back on Ryan.

“That’s not a no. Just a temporary refusal. You’ll come around later.”

I shook my head, holding back a sigh. If only he knew I didn’t have the freedom to just have coffee with anyone, not when I was being watched all the time. Not when someone like Lorenzo was determined to make my life difficult. I wasn’t free enough to say yes, even if I wanted to, and I didn’t want to.

“Ryan,” I finally met his eyes. “You should save your energy for someone else.”

He placed a hand on his chest and staggered backward dramatically like I shot him. “You wound me, Isla. But don’t worry, I'll heal fast.”

Sofia snorted. “You’re ridiculous.”

I dragged Sofia with me before Ryan could say another word. Thankfully, he didn’t share many classes with me so he couldn’t bother me in class.

Then again, I underestimated just how persistent he was. Immediately after my last class was over, I saw him standing outside my class door. He took my books from me with a grin. “Are you going home yet?”

The word, home, left a bitter taste in my mouth. “What else?”

“So you aren’t busy?” I spared him a glance but I didn’t answer. If only my life were as carefree as his. “You’ve been very quiet these days. Is everything okay?” His tone turned serious.

I closed my eyes briefly. Just how much had I been affected that even Ryan noticed it? “I’m fine, really.” I was tired of telling people that I was fine. I wasn’t. I was tired of lying. I needed help. However, I knew no one could help me, not against Lorenzo. No one wanted to offend him in the underworld and the cops were on his payroll. Trying to get help would be putting myself in further trouble.

“So coffee tomorrow?” He asked as we neared the parking lot.

I shook my head and took my books back from him, hastening my steps.

“Coffee? Yes or no! Give me an answer!” He yelled out, like he didn’t already know my answer.

I didn’t reply and just went straight to the black car that waited for me every day, but this time, when I opened the door, I was met by the person I wanted to kill the most in this lifetime.

Lorenzo.