The Unintentional Alpha

Hotel du Sangre

I was escorted out the door, into the same car that had taken us over to the salon what seemed like a hundred years ago. Behind us, the attendants filed into another car. It was just me and Briana this time, and she didn't waste her time trying to fill the silence or make me feel comfortable about what was undoubtedly the biggest event yet in my entire life. She sat across from me, snapping pictures of herself shamelessly, while my legs bounced uncontrollably and shook the ruffles of the dress. 

"Stop that," she snapped suddenly, whacking my knee with the back of her hand. "Sorry," I replied, but she had already been sucked back into her phone. Although I had mine in a pocket that I had absolutely insisted be sewn into the dress, much to my mother's chagrin, I couldn't think about pulling it out. What would I look at? Who could I even talk to. I had never had any really close friends. Sure, I had enough acquaintances. I didn't have any enemies. I could always find a partner for a group project at school. I had even taken a date to prom. But, if I had been somewhat isolated before (mostly due to my mother not being comfortable with me staying overnight anywhere but at the same time didn't want anyone in our home), I had taken isolation to a whole new level now. The party planning had consumed my life. I had received my diploma early so I could take crash courses in all of the wolf stuff that I had never realized that I needed to know. I spent all of my time alone, or with my mother, or in public events that were so big that I may as well have been alone. I was just a prop there; the new wolf in the pack, a weirdo, an anomaly to ogle. I decided to spend the remaining time picking at the seam of the seat next to me; discreetly, as I knew that Briana would tell me to stop that was well.

It felt like minutes and years and seconds and months all at once when we finally pulled up to the venue. The hotel was the only one in our packlands, and was the most elegant and regal building we had too. We had taken a field trip there when I had been a freshman, as part of our historical tour. We had also visited the courthouse; the Pack House, where the Alpha, Beta, and their families lived; and a couple of free-standing homes that had been built when the founders of our pack had chosen this land to settle. I tried to remember any small, stupid fact about the hotel, but suddenly, my brain was mush and I couldn't think of anything at all. 

Aside from being the fanciest building, outside of the Pack House, the hotel was the only building that could house the expected number of party guests. Everyone in our pack had been invited, which was almost a hundred people in and of itself. In addition to that, all of the Alphas, Betas, and other high-ranking pack members of nearly every other pack in the country had been invited, as was tradition when a wolf came of age. Not only was this a party to celebrate a wolf in the pack; this was an investment meeting, and I was the product. If I got marked, everything would change.

My mother led me by the elbow out of the car, steadying me as I wobbled slightly on the step to the ground. One of the attendants adjusted the train of my dress while another dabbed more powder on my increasingly sweaty face. Everyone was already inside. I was the last to arrive and it was time for me to make my entrance. 

As the doors into the grand ballroom opened, I was hit with so many lights, smells, and sounds, that both Bridget and I were on the verge of turning in the other direction and bolting out the door. Running through the woods seemed so, so good right now. I heard someone speaking over the loudspeaker, which I assumed was announcing my entrance, but the buzzing in my ears was so loud that I couldn't make out a single word the DJ was saying. As my eyes adjusted to the spotlight, I glanced around and saw both familiar and unfamiliar faces; the members of my pack, and what I could only postulate were members of other packs. Because I had never known I was a wolf, I had never been invited to any of the birthday parties, or mixers, or camping retreats, that all of the other wolves my age had been at their whole lives. For the most part, everyone knew each other. Except for me, of course. The realization made my heart race. I was a stranger here. They could decorate me like a cake and throw me a true blowout birthday event, but I was a fraud. I didn't belong here. Instinctually, I took one step backward.

If looks could kill, I would've been dead that instant. My mother grasped my elbow more tightly, pulling me back forward, while everyone in the room clapped and cheered and didn't notice (or maybe just ignored) my pathetic attempt at retreat. My blood rushed in my ears as I became existentially aware of every bead of sweat on. my body. I felt hairs out of place on my forehead and cheek. My shoes were suddenly unbearably tight. My dress felt like saran wrap. When my mother placed a microphone in my hands to deliver the welcome and thank you speech that she had written for me, it weighed a thousand pounds.

"Hello, and thank you all so much for coming," I began, a forced smile on my face. I knew I sounded robotic. I was supposed to sound warm and inviting. I continued on with my speech, unfocusing my vision so everyone's faces blended into each other. I hoped I sounded grateful. I hoped I sounded humble. But most of all, I hoped that I was performing well enough for Briana right now.

"Thank you again so much for all of this. This night is truly a dream come true for me. Please, enjoy the hors d'oeuvres and music. Dinner will be served in about an hour." Finally, I was done. The audience erupted in applause again, and it was deafening. The lights were far too bright. The music started up again and I could feel the bass through the floor. My senses were so overstimulated that I almost didn't smell the scent of sandalwood and fresh-cut grass that were so out of place at this formal party. I felt Bridget bristle and the hairs on the back of my neck stood at attention. The room was warm, even more so after my minutes under a full spotlight, but I felt my body shiver like I was standing outside in the cold.

Even though I certainly couldn't hear what I was sure was my mother criticizing my speech or even my own thoughts, I could hear Bridget's voice as clear as if we had been standing in a room by ourselves.

"Mate."