Calla's Story

Chapter 17

Seventeen

Chase’s hands are clasped tightly together in his lap when he finishes. I wonder if he’s ever told this story in its entirety to anyone else. It must be draining to relive it all. The pain and the suffering and the guilt. When we’ve sat in silence for a while, he raises his eyes and whispers, “Please say something.”

Say something? There are so many ‘somethings’ running through my head, it’s hard to know where to begin. “Um … thank you?”

He gives me a half-smile. “I suppose there are far worse things you could say.”

“It’s just … a lot to think about.”

“I know. I’ve never told anyone all of it. Not in detail like that. Most of the time I just get on with life. I protect whoever needs to be protected and then move onto the next project or mission without allowing myself any distractions.”

I play with the laces on my boots and ask, “Where did the name Draven come from?”

He looks down. On the back of his right hand, sticking out below his sleeve, is part of a tattoo I haven’t seen before. “It’s silly,” he says. “It was the name of the street I lived on. Vi called me Mr. Draven Avenue back when I was just an assignment to her. When she didn’t know my name yet. I chose that name so she’d know exactly who it was that caused The Destruction.” He swallows. “That’s how full of hate I was. I wanted her to suffer, to believe that everything I did was her fault.”

I nod to show that I’m listening, but I don’t know what to say to that. I know he isn’t like that anymore, but it’s hard to hear that these monstrous feelings were once the motivation for everything he did. “Um …” I clear my throat. “How did you find me earlier? When I was with the witch, and then just now, in the tunnels.”

“Do you remember my assistant at the tattoo shop? She’s been hanging out in that area, looking out for any of my old clients so she can warn them away from the witches. She told me when you went there the first time, last week. It scared me to know how close you were to danger, but at the same time I was so happy you’d come looking for me. Part of me thought you were probably only there to yell at me, but at least you weren’t staying away anymore. I wondered if I should look for you so I could try to explain everything, but when I saw you later that night at your assignment, you made it clear you didn’t want to talk to me.”

“Well, I was still very angry.”

“Yes. I noticed. Anyway, that’s how I knew you were there earlier. My assistant told me you’d been inside the witches’ shop for far too long. And then later on when you were in the tunnel outside my front door … well, you didn’t think I’d leave my house unwatched, did you? I left a surveillance device there. I wanted to know who would come looking for me.”

I see beyond his words to the real meaning. “You wanted to know if I’d give you away to the Guild.”

He hesitates a moment, then says, “Yes. I didn’t know if I could trust you not to. And I would have understood if you had.”

I bite my lip—noticing that the cut from earlier is now healed—and shift my position on the floor. I’m not sure how to explain why I never gave Chase away to the Guild. I was angry and upset and confused, but something about handing him over didn’t feel right. “Why were you at my assignment anyway?” I ask. “What did you want with that wolf-man? And what were you doing at the Liberation Day Ball?”

“That was all part of finding Gaius. I tracked down anyone who’d been seen in Saber’s company recently. That’s what led me to the wolf-man who was part of your assignment last week. I questioned him, and his answer—that Gaius was being held on Ratafia Island, though he didn’t know exactly where—led me to the woman at your Guild’s Liberation Day Ball. She owns Ratafia Island, and I needed access to all the documentation that details who owns which properties. She unknowingly told me where I could find all those documents.

“By the time you sent a message to me this morning, I had narrowed it down to six different locations on the island. Your message confirmed that it was Piker’s Inn, and I left immediately to find Gaius. The rescue mission was quick, and we were back at the mountain in under an hour—just in time for me to find out you were with one of the witches.”

“And just in time for Gaius to return my Griffin Ability to me so that when my delightful mentor revealed it to a roomful of Guild Councilors, there was no way I could truthfully deny it.” An ache expands across my chest as I relive that moment.

“Oh.” Chase looks up as guilt crosses his face once more. “Damn. That was exceptionally bad timing on our part.”

I shake my head and look out across the grass. “It wouldn’t have made a difference, I suppose. She had a recording of me admitting it, along with a recording of another crime. They would have expelled and arrested me anyway. My Griffin Ability was the only thing that got me out of there, so I’d say it was exceptionally good timing on your part.”

“Oh,” Chase repeats, looking relieved. He watches me, but when I meet his gaze he looks away. He swallows and says, “Can I ask you something?”

“Yes.”

“Do you think you’ll ever trust me again?”

I lace my hands over my knees, considering my answer before giving it to him. “I don’t know. On the one hand, it’s so hard to look at you and imagine Lord Draven, the brainwashing dictator who now fills the pages of so many history books. But on the other hand, it’s impossible to look at you and not remember him now that I know the two of you are the same person.”

He nods slowly. “I understand.”

I rest my chin on my hands and stare past him at the other side of the porch. There’s a swing there, and for a moment I allow myself to imagine a different life where Chase is a normal guy and I’m a normal girl and we can sit together on that swing without a care in the world.

“Calla?”

I blink. “Yeah?”

“I know you didn’t want to hear me say it earlier, but I really am sorry about everything that went down at the Guild today. I know how badly you wanted to be a guardian. I know this is a huge loss for you.”

I squeeze my eyes shut before more tears can come. I breathe slowly until I’m sure I can speak without too much of a quiver in my voice. “I can’t believe it’s just … over. My future. Everything I’ve ever wanted. And not only that, but having my Griffin Ability exposed. I’ll be on the list by now for sure. At least I got away before they tagged me. They won’t be able to track me, but they’ll always be on the look out for me.” I lift my head and cover my face with my hands as I groan. “Ugh, my mom is going to be so mad when she wakes up. This is why she didn’t want me joining the Guild in the first place. Now my whole family’s going to be in trouble. She ran away when she was supposed to tell them her vision, I turned out to be Griffin Gifted, and my dad’s been hiding both of these secrets, so there are bound to be consequences for that.

“Oh.” I drop my hands, realizing suddenly how worried Dad will be. “I need to let my dad know I’m okay. Or Ryn. Wait, why hasn’t Vi found me yet? Oh, she might not even know about all of this yet.” I shake my head and rub my hands over my face. “I’m so tired. I just want to sleep and forget for a while that any of this happened.”

Chase stands. “You can stay at the mountain if you’d like. It’s the safest place to be. Protected against magical influence and tracking and all of that. Vi won’t be able to find you if you’re there, though. And if you’re not comfortable with me being there … I mean, if you’d rather stay somewhere else—”

“No, it’s fine, I—Gaius is also there, right?” Chase nods. “Okay. Yes, I’ll stay there.” Chase extends his hand to help me up just as I push myself to my feet. He ends up hiding his hands awkwardly in his pockets.

“Um, I can send a note with a messenger to your father,” he suggests. “Old school style. We can’t say where you are, of course, but we can at least let him know you’re okay.”

I nod. “Thank you.” We walk back inside and Chase closes the door behind us. I realize that I’ll probably never return to my own home again—that I essentially have no home now—and I wrap my arms around my chest to keep myself from falling apart again. As Chase pulls out the gold key for the faerie door, I look around and realize why part of this room looked familiar earlier. “This is the furniture from your old house Underground.”

“Yes. Luna’s furniture. It doesn’t fit in with everything else here, but I guess I’m too sentimental to get rid of it.”

“So … this is your house?”

“Yes. I’ve had it for some time, though I don’t use it much. It’s similar to a house my parents and I used to stay at during vacations when I was growing up. I moved the faerie door here after I vacated the tattoo shop, but before that, this house was completely separate from any of my work. I used to come here sometimes to just … get away.”

He unlocks the faerie door and we head through the vacuum of time and space to the entrance hall inside the mountain. We walk up the stairs and along a carpeted passage, where Chase opens a door to a bedroom. It looks similar to the one I wound up in last time after taking a nauseating trip back in time—four-poster bed, wardrobe, thick rug on the floor—but I can’t tell if it’s the same one. “Thank you,” I say to Chase. “I don’t know where I’d go if it wasn’t for this place.”

“Well, you’re intelligent and resourceful, so I’m sure you would have figured something out, but this way you don’t have to. One less thing to worry about.”

I nod. There are already too many things buzzing around my tired brain without adding the stress of finding a safe place to hide for the night.

“I’m sure the Guild will be watching your family closely over the next few weeks in case you try to contact them,” Chase says, “but I can probably organize a way for you to safely meet with them.”

“Really? That would be amazing.”

“It may take a little bit of time, but it’s definitely possible.”

“Okay.” I rub my hands up and down my arms. The air is colder here than at home. “Why … why would you go to all that trouble? I mean, I’m sure you have plenty of other stuff going on.”

“Well …” He takes a deep breath. “I’ve got a lot to make up for, haven’t I?”

I’m not sure if he’s talking about me specifically or the entire world, but either way, that’s an understatement.

“And … um … ” Chase looks down at the floor, then shakes his head. “Anyway, I hope you’re able to sleep.” He closes the door, and I’m left alone with my memories of the Guild turning on me and the knowledge that nothing will ever be the same again.

I go into the adjoining bathing room and clean the dried blood off my arm. Then I drag myself to bed. I have no idea where in the world we are or whether it’s night or day, but I want to sleep, sleep, sleep and hope that everything is somehow okay when I wake up.