Chapter 3 — Melody

1067 Words
I didn’t tell Priya the whole truth about what had happened in the kitchen. I gave her the easy version—he asked about an invoice, it was weird, forget it—and she let it go because the lunch rush swallowed us both whole. The rush was worse than usual that day. We had a catering order for the twelfth floor on top of the regular crowd, and dishes piled up faster than I could clear them. Priya ran trays with her hair coming loose from its bun, swearing under her breath whenever a table sent something back. By the time we finally reached the lull between lunch and dinner service, my feet were paying for it. Honestly, I was grateful. I welcomed anything that kept my hands too busy to think. But I kept the real version to myself all day, turning it over like a coin in my pocket. He had said, I would have remembered you. Five words. I’d built entire houses out of less. By the time my shift ended, I had walked myself through it a dozen times, and each time it felt a little more real. The way his voice had dropped when he said it, as though the words had surprised him too. That half second before he caught himself—I hadn’t imagined it. I knew what I’d seen. “You’re doing the thing,” Priya said, catching me staring at nothing while I untied my apron. “What thing?” “The thing where you go somewhere else in your head.” She grabbed her bag from the hook. “Whatever it is, it’s got you smiling like an idiot.” I probably was. I didn’t care. “Just—don’t get your hopes up about him, okay?” Priya said it lightly, but she wasn’t quite looking at me. “I heard the front desk girls talking. Something about a fiancée. I don’t know if it’s true.” “A fiancée.” The word sounded strange, as though it belonged to someone else’s day rather than mine. “Might be nothing. People at this place gossip about anything with a pulse.” She shrugged, already halfway to the door, her keys jingling in her free hand. “Just—don’t.” I told myself she was probably right. It was probably nothing. I walked home the long way that night, past the little bakery with the yellow awning and the park where a woman was chasing two toddlers in matching coats. When I was a child, I used to invent entire lives for strangers like that. This one was a teacher. That one had just moved here. Another was about to fall in love with someone she hadn’t met yet. My aunt back home used to catch me doing it and shake her head. You’ll marry a daydream someday and starve on it, she would say. Not unkindly. Just tired, the way people grew tired of watching someone hope too hard. Maybe she had been wrong. My apartment was two flights down from street level, a basement unit I shared with a leaky faucet and a landlord who took three weeks to answer my texts. It wasn’t much. It had never bothered me before that night. I had always told myself that a roof was a roof, that plenty of people had it worse, and that complaining about a home you could afford was its own kind of ingratitude. But that night, as I walked down the narrow concrete steps with my keys already in my hand, I let myself notice how small it all was. The chipped tile in the entryway. The single working burner on the stove. How little I had to show for four months of double shifts. Maybe all those years of scrubbing other people’s dishes, eating other people’s leftovers, and sleeping in a room the size of a closet were only the part before the good part. The setup. Every story needed one. I let myself think about it properly for the first time that night as I lay on my bed with the ceiling fan clicking overhead. It was the same fan that had clicked above me every night for four months. The same water stain on the ceiling, shaped vaguely like a rabbit if I squinted. The same street noise leaking through a window that never quite closed all the way. Nothing about my life had changed since that morning. That was the strange part. Everything around me still looked ordinary, even though something inside me had shifted so completely that I barely recognized the shape of my own thoughts. Kane Eclipse. His name was on the building. His name was probably on half the city. And he had looked at me—me, wearing a stained apron with dishwater up to my elbows—as though I were the only person in the room. That didn’t happen to girls like me. Not in real life. But it had happened, and I had felt something too. Something that didn’t have a name but rested beneath my skin like a held breath. I let myself imagine it. Not the money or the building with his name on it. Just him looking at me the way he had for that one long second. Someone finally seeing me instead of looking straight through me. I fell asleep still smiling, which should have told me something. Good things didn’t usually announce themselves that loudly. But I was twenty-two, tired, and hungry for something I couldn’t name. For one night, I let myself believe that the universe had finally decided to give me something instead of taking it away. I didn’t dream about him exactly. I dreamed about the kitchen—the steam, the fogged window, and the particular quiet that had fallen over the room just before he walked in. Except in the dream, the quiet lasted longer. He stayed at that window until his coffee went cold, and no one’s phone ever buzzed with something more urgent than me. I woke before my alarm, still half inside the dream, and lay there a minute too long, trying to hold on to the feeling before the day could take it back. I didn’t know yet what he was already arguing himself out of, high above me, in an office I would never see.
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