Roses and Flames

Chapter 26

After leaving Thorne, Patrick still wanted a drink. In a case like this, Dr Hastings would describe a brandy for shock. And that a chance to sit down and sort this true without people prying through the contents of his head. “Physician, heal thyself,” he muttered and headed towards the decanter in the library.

When his nerves were settled, he would find Ambrose. He must apologize for his words in the garden. As soon as they had cleared the air of that, he could persuade her to cry off the engagement and come away with him. It would have to do. There was no time for proper courtship and bans. He must get her out of London before the scandal broke. And even more important, he must get her away from this house. He had been able to manage a chilly respect when he had believed Thorne to be his father.

But he owed that man nothing at all now. He had not been taken out of love or charity, or for any bond or family. His presence here had been to curry favor with the old Duke. It was nothing more than that. It was only a matter of time before he shouted those words in thorns face, along with the ugliness that Patrick had believed to be the truth.

Ambrose must never know of that. Thorn had been trying, in his own Safeway, to protect her. If Patrick was to be her husband, that task would fall on him. And he would make a better job of it.

“Hastings!”

 Patrick flinched. His newfound brother had been waiting for him in the hall, eager to continue the conversation. He turned stiffly. “Your grace.”

 The Duke looked faintly amused. “You cannot avoid me for the rest of your life if I am going to claim you as my family.”

Perhaps not. But he was tempted to try. I am not avoiding you, he said cautiously. I thought you meant to let things settle, before talking again.

How long is that likely to take? Did you cast. Apparently, he thought a few moments were long enough to reorder once whole understanding of life.

“It was a considerable shock to me, to learn the truth after all this time.”

The Duke nodded. “I suppose I cannot really imagine, anymore than you could imagine my life.”

“My presence or absence could not really matter so much to it,” Patrick said, dryly.

The Duke seemed surprised. “On the contrary. Although I can afford almost any luxury, this was the one thing that I knew that I it was always out of my reach. One cannot purchase a brother.”

Any more than one could seize to have a sister. But it had happened to Patrick. He looked at the Duke again, trying to raise some of the filial emotion that the man hope for. He felt only jealousy.

“It takes more than blood to create such a link.”

“Perhaps,” the Duke allowed. “But I see no reason while the two of us might not at least become friends.”

If he saw no reason, then he was deliberately being obtuse. But then, when they had met, the Duke had assumed a bond existed between Patrick and Ambrose. Patrick had denied it and relinquished all claim on her. He could not suddenly reverse the position without explaining his reasons. And he did not want to become like Thorne, willing to say anything to achieve his ends. The shame of his earlier beliefs so die quietly, assuming he did not speak of them to all and sundry. New found kinship did not entitle the duke to every sordid detail of Patrick’s past. In his mind, he transferred the cordial indifference he had shared with Thorne to his new family and give a respectful nod.

“Sorry. You are correct. I am being unreasonable about the situation.”

“As you said, it was a shock,” the Duke reminded him. “You can hardly be expected to take it calmly. Your temper doesn’t offend me in the least. Certain latitudes of personality are permitted. Family in families.” The words made him grin again, showing that he felt no reservations at all in the discovery. It was another example of the man superior nature. And it was tiresome in the extreme.

“All the same, I apologize,” Patrick said, grudgingly.

“Apology accepted,” said the Duke. There was no corresponding apology, of course because the man had never done anything to need one. He was, as he had been from the first, perfect. But now he was engaged to Ambrosia.

“And now that we have settled, you must excuse me,” Patrick said, suddenly sure that he had to look at the handsome face and listen to one more sensible word he would fall on that look like an animal and beat him senseless.

“A moment.” The Duke held up a single finger, as though a small gesture was all he needed to subdue Patrick. “This still doesn’t answer my question. I do not see any reason why we cannot become friends.”

 To you? It was an opportunity to be honest, for once. To explain the situation and how impossible a friendship between them would be.

Instead, he lied through the teeth. “Of course not.”

“Then it is settled.” The Duke was smiling at him as the a few words had cemented their relationship. “If you wish, I’ll put forth as a member of my club.”

Where they could keep running into each other, he supposed. Did the man intend to be omnipresent in his life?

The duke saw his hesitation. It will give you a chance to meet other gentleman advance to the position of your choosing. You might not wish to be my personal physician. But there are number of gouty old Lords in need of your services. Perhaps one of them would suit you.

When put this way, it was actually a tempting offer. And had it been on like it a short the offer from any other person. Patrick felt movements wistfulness for the family he might have had, had things been different. He had not thought he needed an actual father. At least not for the affection. But a hand on his shoulder to steady him, to educate him, and to introduce him to the correct circles which would have been damned helpful. He had it once from torn. That man had proved false in the end. Then he remembered the reason for a change of heart. It was the same reason he could not accept the help of the man in front of him ambrosia. Patrick gave a respectful nod of his head, trying to keep the sarcasm from his voice.

“Thank you for your offer, your grace. But, regretfully, I decline. I doubt I would have much use for a club membership, nor I have any intention of remaining in the city.”

Nor would he be particularly welcome here, should his plans come to fruition. He would either leave alone a broken man, or scuttle the romantic hopes of the very man who sought to help him.

“Very well, then. As you wish.” By the look of his face that you could not decide whether to be angry or disappointed by his latest rejection, probably he was not used to hearing the word no. “But you must dine with me tomorrow night. I insist upon it.”

Insisted, did he? And what did it have to do with Patrick’s own desires? He searched for the first available lie. “Unfortunately, that will not be possible. I am otherwise engaged. Now, if you will please excuse me?”

Then he made his retreat to find the only person he really wanted to see.

“Ambrose. We must speak.” Patrick was striding towards her with a grim smile on his face and all the purpose and conviction of the British Navy.

Ambrosia felt a flutter of apprehension. It seemed like she had been holding her breath for the better part of an hour, waiting for some word from the office. Perhaps she would see the two of them, side by side, shaking hands and revealing in their good fortune. It would be awkward, for awhile. But maybe some good would come of the evening and she would feel less guilty for her lapse in the garden. But the Duke was nowhere to be seen. And Patrick was using her full name, as he only did when he was angry, or maintaining the same artificial formality that he had been.

“Pat,” she turned to him, reminding herself that she must not reach for his hands, or give any other of the familiar gestures that seemed to inflamed his passion for her. He ignored her coldness and held her by the shoulders. Unlike the gentle touches in the garden, his grip was tight, as though he feared she would run from him if he released her.

“How long have you known?” There could be no question of what he meant. And he did not seem that the truth had set him free, as the Bible said. He looked more guarded than ever. She looked away, free to meet his eyes. Now she feel guilty for this as well? It was the one only thing that she had been so sure of.

Other than her love for Patrick, of course. And that had been wrong. Now, she was losing all confidence in this decision as well.

“I have suspected for some time. When that you began spending time with me at the beginning of the season, he seemed so familiar to me, like an old friend, though I knew that I had not known him before. But it was only a suspicion. And then you returned and I knew.”

“Why did you not come to me with this information? Or did you tell him?” His voice was rough and the words were punctuated by a shake.

“Patrick!” She pulled away from him. “Do not think that our old friendship allows you to treat me so. I did not tell you because I had no proof. You would have thought the idea ridiculous and dismissed it. As for telling the Duke…”

 now it was his turn to look away. Was he still jealous? Why did he bother to show it now? When it was too late?

“It was unworthy of me to accuse you. Just now, he was as surprised as I.”

“I did not mean to keep a secret from either of you. It was only recently that I took my suspicions to father and more recently still that I convinced him to admit the truth and shared the news with you and Samuel.”

“Your fiancé,” Patrick said, looking seriously at her.

“Your brother,” she added, wishing that she could be happy about the news.

“And was the decision to marry in anyway tied to this revelation? The timing seems most convenient?”

“Father agreed to share the information, now that Samuel is to be my husband,” she said. “And what difference could that make to anything?”

“Then this marriage,” Patrick gave a broad sweep of his hand, “has nothing to do with the depth of your affection for the Duke.”

 Why did you wait until now to care about how she felt about the do? He had not troubled to ask her of this before? Then, he had been set on her accepting the man, ordering her about, as if he had the right to.

“He is as good as man as one could hope for. You told me so yourself. When you know him better, you will like him, as I do.”

“That is impossible, Ambrose. And you should know the reason why.”