Roses and Flames

Chapter 19

Would the memory of that be enough to sustain her, or would it become a bitter reminder of how a marriage might feel, if it was to the right man?

It did not really matter. Patrick had thrust her from the room and was probably still planning to leave the country. And all because she had forced him. If she continued to do so, she would lose his friendship along with his love.

She turned to the duke, this time with her full attention, or very near to it.” I am sorry. I never meant to be cruel to you, or to keep you waiting so long. You are right. It is time that I answered.”

To her surprise, the man at her side looked eager to hear her response. And there was a flicker of doubt in it, as though he was not sure what it might be. She had been so focused on herself and her own wishes that she had been tormenting him with her indifference.

He deserved better.

“Of course I will marry you. At the time of your choosing.”

“A special license is the thing, I understand,” he said.” Brides all want them, to show that the groom is ardent and has some pull with court. I will procure one. But the actual ceremony need not to be hurried. We must allow enough time to celebrate the event….”

He continued to plan, as eager as a bride, while Ambrosia retreated to a place to a place where life was simpler, endings happier and kisses as passionate as she knew they could be.

Patrick roused to the sound of a knocking at the door. Or perhaps the hammering was in skull. It was no less than he deserved. Life at sea had injured him to strong drink. But the quantity he had taken in the last day and a half was enough to send a sailor’s brain to pounding.

“Doctor Hastings.”

Without another thought he was out of the bed, his hand on his case of medicines.” What is it? Am I needed?” He shook his head to clear it, ready to face whatever emergency awaited him.

“Nothing so dire, I am sure. There is a letter for you, sir.” The innkeeper waited nervously in the hall, a liveried footman from Wentworth Hall beside him.

Probably a cheerful missive from Ambrose, expecting him to dance attendance on her, as though nothing had happened between them. But he would not forget the sight of her, kneeling between his thighs.

He shook his head again, harder, and let the pain it caused to be distraction. The girl was far too headstrong for her own good. And naïve as well. The best way to protect that innocence was to stay far away from it. Patrick rubbed a hand over his dry eyes.” Whatever it is, tell him he can take it to the devil.”

The footman looked alarmed, but did not budge.” I am to put it into your hand directly and wait for an answer, Dr. Hastings.” Tom had been an underfootman when Patrick had left the Wentworths. He had been younger than Ambrosia, no more than a child and already in service.

Had she chosen him for him for this, sure that Patrick would remember the boy with sympathy and not to wish to give him trouble? She was a demon to torment him with tricks like that. But it was another proof that she knew him as well as he knew himself. He sighed.” Very well, then.” He held out his hand for the letter. “Wait.” Then he closed the door on the pair of them and broke the seal.

He could recognize the hand in an instant, for he had seen it often enough, coming to both love and dread her regular letters. It appeared this one could not be avoided. He could not very well climb out a second storey window in an attempt to get away from it, and by sending Tom she made it impossible to deny its receipt.

Patrick.

He held his breath. The start was innocent enough. But there was not a thing he could stand to hear from the girl, after the shame of what had happened between them.

Firstly, let me apologise for coming to your rooms and upsetting you as I did. I had no right and no invitation.

And no reason to apologise, since the fault and the sin had been totally his.

I must offer a second apology for trying to control the course of your life and choose your future to suit myself. I have no doubt that you are quite capable of surviving without me. It is pure selfishness on my part to try to manage you.

But I beg you, with all my heart, not to return to the sea. Above all, do not go there on my account. I swear, I will do what is necessary to keep you safe, even if that requires me to cease communication with you.

Dear Ambrose. She was frightened for him and willing to do anything to preserve his unworthy life. He felt the tightness in his chest, half joy, half regret, that came with any thought of her. He smoothed the letter in his hands and read more.

On your recommendation, and that of my father, along with the continued requests from the duke himself, I have agreed to Samuel’s offer of marriage. To celebrate the engagement, Father is giving a ball this coming Wednesday. I must remind you, you promised to attend. And despite all that happened after, I hold you to that promise.

Damn the girl. He had promised. And despite what reason demanded, he did not want to go too soon.

If it is truly your wish that I marry, I need your strength to help me carry it through. And if, for any reason, it is not, then you must tell me before that time.

I await your answer….

Et cetera.

For the first time in her life, Ambrosia Wentworth had done exactly as he had told her to. It was a trap, of course. She had finished the letter with a reminder that he might stop the proceedings at any time. He had but to ask and she would cry off.

And in that, she had created the perfect hell for him. It was no less than he deserved, he supposed.