Our Lady of Pain

Chapter Four-1

Chapter Four

Corinne pried her hands off the steering wheel to put the car in park. It had been a white-knuckled drive all the way home. This was madness. She dropped her keys twice on her way to the front door. The cat begged to be fed. Corinne snapped at it and clumsily filled its bowl. When she finally sat down, she wondered just what it was she was so upset about. The television droned before her. So the man was a bit on the pushy side, more self-assured than anyone she’d ever met before and had ordered her meal for her. Was that really so terrible? And even after her rude behavior, he’d offered to buy dinner and invited her out next week. When was the last time that happened?

Guilt began to grow weeds in her brain. “I was an i***t, wasn’t I, Heidi?” The cat paused from licking itself clean at the sound of its name but offered no reply. It went back to cleaning its paws. “I’m afraid of him,” she whispered, bending down to scratch the cat behind the ears. “But he’s a priest. A priest! Even I know he shouldn’t be so tempting.”

Two hours later, after taking something for her headache, Corinne pulled the blankets up over herself and closed her eyes. “Look at me… Remember what the prince did to Beauty? Sit down…Free to get up and walk out… No one is holding you in that chair.”

She yanked herself awake. It ached between her legs again. Corinne’s fingers stroked the tender bud that longed for touch. She was wet and warm. Even her n*****s tingled. She needed the release or she would not sleep. Corinne’s hand rubbed harder, steadier, until the passion flowed from her. She arched her back and gasped, pressing against herself. The orgasm shuddered through her, letting out a moan. Then quiet. The sound of her own breathing and her heart pumping in her ears quieted. Her eyes remained closed even when the trickle of tears came. He knows what I want and who I am. Man of God or not, he knows and maybe that’s how he knows and wants to take these feelings away from me. How could she ever look at him again? How could she ever go back there and feel him looking at her as he’d done? He’d touched her and the touch had been like a spark. Her breasts felt heavy. Her s*x would not be calmed.

She slept and woke to the yearnings of her body over and over again. The night dragged on. By morning Corinne was exhausted. She called in sick. She stayed in bed until noon. She did not sleep. She came. She came so many times that she lost count and still her body demanded more. Corinne showered slowly, feeling herself covered in soapy lather. She went to the bedroom, still damp from washing, spread out on the bed naked and brought herself to climax again.

I have got to get out of here. Corinne dressed quickly. She got in her car, not knowing where she was going, just going. She drove ten minutes and found herself heading in the direction of the mall. She’d go and do some shopping. She’d keep her mind, and hands, busy with something else.

The bookstore loomed in front of her. No. She told herself and walked away. Go get lunch. Some food. That’s what you need. You’ve not eaten since last night and you’re delirious. She ate, gazing down from the balcony food court to the bookstore sign below. She tried to close her mind against it but the more she tried the more it screamed.

They didn’t have the book at the store. They’d had the God damned three-volume boxed set! Corinne wrapped the flimsy white bag around her purchase tightly, making sure no one would be able to see the contents within. Over fifteen years had passed since she’d read that one book. Corinne had not forgotten what it was about though. She was afraid to find out what was in the other two.

At bedtime, Corinne propped her pillows up, opened the first book and began to read. It all flooded back to her. This time the prince had Gregory Monroe’s eyes and mouth. It was Father Monroe’s hands that yanked her hair back. It was his mouth that kissed her so hard she could not breathe. It was Gregory’s c**k that filled her mouth and cunt and ass. It was he who struck her with the whip and he who bound her to the foot of his bed. Corinne read until she could no longer focus on the page in front of her. She read until the place between her legs was so wet it soaked through her thin panties. While one hand held the book, the other probed the wetness.

Corinne closed her eyes, slid down off the pillows and drew her legs up. He knows, her mind told her. He knows. The prince knows, Corinne, and all you have to do is ask him. Ask him to take you. Ask him to f**k you. Ask him. She came so violently the room spun and seemed to go dim. The book fell to the floor, unheard. She came and then she curled into a ball and wept. She wept for the wasted years trying to find this very feeling. She wept knowing what she had known all along and never having the courage to be honest about it. She’d hidden it away, locked it in a room, left it to shrivel and die. But it had not died. She had started to die instead.

On the other side of the city, Gregory Monroe waited.

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday crawled by at a snail’s pace. And then it was Thursday again. Corinne got little sleep. She ate only because she knew she had to. She had no appetite. Her brain told her she’d not go back to see him. Her heart, on the other hand, spoke differently. All three books she had read over the weekend and never would the images created leave her. Never would his face vanish.

When Corinne finally walked into the restaurant that night, he was standing there by the door, knowing she’d come. His eyes were fire and passion. His smile was gentle and reassuring. “You’re late.”

“There was a tow truck in the way,” her tone was quiet.

His hand rested on the small of her back. “Our table is ready. I told them to hold it for us.” The hostess smiled at them, directing them to a table in the corner, slightly away from the other diners. Two glasses of wine and two glasses of water waited for them. Gregory pulled out the chair for Corinne before seating himself.

“I know what you want,” she said suddenly because if she didn’t she’d not get the courage up to say it again. “You want to convert me or something, don’t you?”

He was smiling broadly. “You are much prettier when you look up at me. As lovely as you are with your eyes down, I like to see them as well,” he picked up his menu, opened it and nodded after awhile. “What do you fancy tonight?”

“I’m right, aren’t I?”

He didn’t answer. “Filet Minot, maybe or they have a good filet of cod here as well, I’m told. Have you ever had it?”

She cleared her throat. “No, I’ve never had it.” Corinne had not even touched her menu.

“I think we’ll try that tonight then,” he lay the menu down and looked at her again. Immediately, her gaze lowered. “No. Don’t look down, Corinne. Look at me,” slowly she looked back again. “Very nice. You see, I won’t hurt you. Yes, you are correct but, I won’t do anything you truly do not want me to do. Come and visit the Chapel and talk to the people that live there. If it’s something you are interested in, wonderful. If not, I will leave you alone. But I think you’ll like what you find at Saint Dolores, Corinne. I really do. And you’ll be surprised at what you like, I think,” her eyes shied away again.

Corinne was thankful when the waitress came to take their order. She took a long, deep drink of her water. “You’ll leave me alone if I’m not interested? Easy as that?”

“Easy as that,” he said.

She took a deep breath. “Can I ask you something personal?”

“Of course.”

“You’re a priest, right?”

“Yes.”

“You don’t act like any priest I’ve ever met before. You’re very…” Her cheeks blossomed. “You’re…”

His hand covered hers and squeezed it. “s****l?”

She didn’t have to look at him to know his eyes were riveted to her. “Yes.”

“Does that bother you?”

Corinne looked up but kept her tone hushed. “Does it bother me? Of course it bothers me. You’re a priest! Priests don’t act like you do, like you’re trying to seduce me.”

“Once you visit the Chapel, I think you’ll understand.” The waitress came and went. “Service is at seven o’clock, Friday nights at Saint Dolores Chapel. Do you know where that is?” She shook her head. Gregory pulled out a business card and slid it, face up, across the table towards her. “Berkshire Terrace. The address is there and the Rectory number if you need to reach me,” silently, Corinne took the card and slid it into her purse.

Dinner arrived and despite how good it looked and smelled, Corinne had lost a great deal of her appetite. She picked at her plate and tried to make, if not witty at least intelligent, conversation. Despite her attempts, nothing could halt the long silent pauses that plagued their meal together. Corinne fidgeted and blushed, stammered and giggled far too much for her own liking. Gregory, who seemed amused by her discomfort, was relaxed and casual. Calmness radiated from him. He was in control without even trying.

Gregory knew there was a fire behind that shy, stammering façade. He’d seen it last week in her indignation. He’d seen it tonight in her bout of sarcasm. It was that fire to which he wanted to feed tinder. Let her grow into an inferno, he thought, and then his job would truly begin. That job was not to quench or calm the blaze but to contain it, control it, tend to it, giving it what it needed. His goal was to make Corinne what she wanted to be. He’d taken a chance approaching her. His instincts so far had proven correct. But she was not yet ready. He’d waited this long. He could wait just a little while more.

“Do you like cheesecake?”

When the waitress came near he drew her attention and ordered their desserts.

“Strawberry, cherry or blueberry topping?”

“Corinne? What’s your pleasure?”

She blushed. “Cherry.”

Gregory suppressed a smile. “I’ll have blueberry,” he watched the waitress go then laced his fingers and rested his hands on the table. “So, tell me, what do you remember about the book?”

Corinne began to fidget again. “I didn’t remember much so I… I bought a new copy last weekend,” his eyebrows arched. “There were two others, in a set, so I bought them all.”

“And did you have a chance to read those, too?” Corinne nodded. Dessert arrived and for a while the conversation was still. Gregory let her eat without questions. When both had finished, he started in again. “Did you like the others?”

With a pale, blue napkin to her lips, Corinne paused and looked down. “I’d forgotten a lot of it.”

“But did you enjoy it? The story? The scenarios?” Gregory took a quiet sip of coffee.

“It’s interesting.”

“Would you like to try it?”

“It was a little outrageous, don’t you think?” She actually laughed.

He set his coffee cup down. “That’s not what I asked. Would you like to try it? Be honest. If nothing else, never lie to me Corinne, never. Understand?”

Her eyes grew dark. “Yes, I understand and I was not lying to you. I said what I thought. It was a bit outrageous. Do you have a problem with that?”

There was the spark again. He so loved that spark. “Fair enough. Let me put it another way. If such a place existed, would you want to go there? Humor me but be truthful.”

“I suppose. Maybe.”

“And where would you fit in, Corinne? Which side of the whip would you enjoy?”

She shrugged, tugging at the corner of the napkin. “I dunno.”

“Yes, you do,” he waited for her to answer, just let the question hang there in the air for

a bit. He studied her face and restless hands. She wore no jewelry, not even a watch. He was certain if she’d had on anything of that kind it would now be twisting between her fingers. But she did not have that luxury so her cloth napkin suffered the abuse instead. Gregory reached over and rested his hand on top of hers. It was the second time he’d touched her skin. “Which side?”

“Sub..submissive,” she said.

Gregory slid his hand away. “Then we’d make a fine pair.”

“Have… have you done it before? That kinda stuff?” she asked.

“Many times,” his coffee cup was refilled.

Corinne turned down another cup of tea. “At a place like that?”

His eyes closed briefly. “No, not in a place like that.”

“You’ve done those things to people?”

His laugh was warm and friendly. “Yes,” he studied her. “Maybe some day you will ask me to do them to you, Corinne.”

She chewed on the inside of her bottom lip. “Maybe.”

“I look forward to that day.”

She couldn’t look at him, couldn’t speak, couldn’t acknowledge in any way that she was thinking the exact same thing.

The streetlight across the road cast the inside of Corinne’s apartment in shadow. It shone in long, rectangles through the bay window, just touching the edge of the oriental style carpet. Dark and quiet and still. Corinne took a deep breath and sighed. All this was hers. All this was empty. Her first marriage had survived five years. Thank God she was unable to have children. He’d left when Corinne had told him she wasn’t happy. He didn’t want to work it out. Last she knew he’d moved back to his hometown, gotten a job at the local furniture mill and was doing well. She didn’t miss him.

She flipped on the hallway light on her way to the kitchen. Heidi crunched her cat food. She’d brought nothing home for the cat. “I’ll remember next time,” she scratched the cat’s head then gave it a pat. She’d never forgotten before. Corinne felt a twinge of guilt. In the bedroom, Corinne stripped down to her panties, tossing her clothes to the floor beside the hamper.

Which side of the whip…? she heard his voice in her head.

Corinne stretched out on the bed, kicking the rumpled blankets to the floor. She lay back and closed her eyes against the heat.

“Take the panties off.”

Her eyes snapped open. “What?!”

Father Monroe stood at the foot of her bed, a heavy riding crop in his hands. “Take them off.”