Touch This Fire

4. Anthony

AnthonySince the building that I had worked at was now out of commission I found myself doing work from home which was a waste of time because all I did was think about Shawn. Never in my life had I allowed myself to let a guy get to me like I had with Shawn. I felt out of control, scared and happy all at once. I didn’t know if I had enough guts to see this thing through where ever it may lead but I was certainly going to enjoy the ride!

Finally after the longest week of my life, the big night rolled around. I tried unsuccessfully not to stress out about my clothes and after about an hour I finally decided on something suitable to wear. We decided to both meet at this café that we both liked and then see where the evening would take us. If it lasted that long of course. After all, I did have this stupid habit of being an i***t!

Trying not to sprint I made myself think casual thoughts as I entered the café. My capacity for rational speech went out the window with one look from Shawn. He could have worn a sack and looked beautiful! The green shirt matched his amazing eyes and his butt in those jeans... Let’s just say it was going to be torture not being able to touch him.

Stuffing my trembling hands in my pockets I smiled and made my way to our table. Shawn took a look at my face and laughed. “Anthony relax... I don’t bite”.

His joking calmed me a little and I sat across the table. The waitress came over to take our order, which broke the awkward silence, and we both were amused that we ordered the same thing.

“So... Shawn began... How are you doing after the fire and all? You look like you’ve recovered well”. A faint blush touched his cheeks, which only made me want him more.

Clearing my throat I replied. “ I’m doing good thanks. It’s weird not going in to work every day but they have me doing stuff from home which is a waste of time because all I think about it you”. My mouth dropped open and I prayed the floor would open up and swallow me! Why in the hell did I say that? Why, why, why?!! Groaning softly I let my head fall onto my hands. I sat there for what felt like hours and waited for the shoe to drop.

Then I felt Shawn’s fingers brush my hair gently. “Anthony... .. Anthony? Would you look at me... Please?”

The pleading tone in his voice made me glance up. He took one of my hands in his almost like he was afraid I would bolt. “Do you have any idea how incredibly attracted I am to you right now? I love it that when you’re around me you forget to be on guard, which leads me to believe that you are starting to feel the same way. We don’t know anything about each other but I would like to change that... .. So what do you say?”

What could I say? Shawn had put his heart right there on the table and I would have been a total prick not to respond in kind. I moved his hand to my lips and kissed his fingertips gently. “Yes” I managed to croak out. “I think I would really like that too”. The waitress of course chose that moment to bring our orders over and we broke apart laughing at our candor and obvious mutual attraction.

We spent the better part of the evening just talking and I have to say it was one of the nicest dates I’ve ever been on. I didn’t share much about myself. I mean let’s face it there wasn’t much to share. I work and I’m a closed off i***t when it comes to relationships oh yeah and I’m a coward too.

That sounds harsh I guess but I know who I am and I have no problems being honest about that. I guess Shawn noticed my lack of information and he kept asking me questions that required more than a yes or no answer.

Being the artful dancer that I am, I managed to dodge most of them and he sighed in obvious frustration but eventually gave up. Now it came to “that” time of the evening. I was unsure how to proceed. Do I ask him up for a drink? Do we shake hands and make another date?

That question was answered for me as we made our way outside. Turning me gently, Shawn bent and took my lips with his. Before I could think about a response my body took over and I moaned as we pressed together. Breaking apart we both came up for air and then remembered where we were. Shawn grinned sheepishly at me.

“Sorry. I just couldn’t wait anymore. So now what do we do?”

I gaped at him. “You’re asking me? I know what I would love to do but I don’t know what you’ll think about it”.

Shawn took a step closer, his breath ruffling my hair. “Try me.” He whispered. I swear in that moment I have never been so close to losing control and I have never been that turned on by someone... ever.

I took his face in my hands. “I want to take you home and cover every inch of you in kisses and just when you think you’re about to lose your mind, I’ll show you heaven.” Ok big words to live up to but making someone feel great in the bedroom has never been an issue for me.

A small shiver passed through Shawn as he nodded his agreement. My place was only ten minutes away so we chose to go there. On the walk home I reached out and took Shawn’s hand in mine. Our fingers twined together and I once again felt that small pang of fear. I knew I was falling for Shawn and as afraid as I was of getting hurt I just couldn’t seem to pull back to a comfortable distance.