STRAINING UNDER SUMMER HEAT the air-conditioner hiccups, shudders, and thumps. I roll my head toward the noisy corner where the AC resumes a peaceful hum. With apathy, I gaze at the ceiling. Numb. Softly, I rest my hands on my chest. It still beats regardless. I wish to place my heart in a jar, protect and shield it till sorrow"s done. Grief … I"ve never suffered five stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—just three. How can you deny reality? And bargaining is useless when circumstances are beyond one"s control. You can only mourn the loss. Three faces of grief have visited in my twenty-four years. The first time was during my parent"s divorce, second, Grandma Blu"s death, and third, McClelland"s layoff. Each visit, though different, was painful all the same.
Numb.I
