THE WOLF PRINCESS

The decision

Weeks had passed. Day and night, I looked for Esther. But I couldn’t find her. Anything that indicates that she was alive has never been found. I felt sorry for her family, Henry told me that their mother didn’t stop to ask him about the update.

I stopped in front of the river. I looked at the leaves that flowed in the calm water. “How could I spread the news about her? I thought it was about to stop. I couldn’t find her, even I tried,” I said those words to me. I gave up. It was not right to force things that were not good. If she would be back, that would be nice, but if she didn’t, I couldn’t control it. She has chosen her fate.

I changed my form and ran back to my house. When I saw Henry that waited for me to come back, I walked toward him and back to my human form.

“I was sorry for your loss. But I couldn’t find her. Sorry.” I apologized for their loss. They felt hurt by the disappearance of that weak human, but I couldn’t do anything. I was tired.

Henry didn’t say any words. He just let his breath out. I felt his heavy heart. I didn’t know how to comfort him. Anything I could say, I was sorry if I didn't fulfill my promise. Aside from that, nothing could be changed.

“Was she dead? Should we accept her death?” It came from his wounded heart. I felt his sorrow, everyday since Esther lost, I never saw him back to a happy life. His family was drowned to the sadness they felt.

I didn’t say any words. I looked at him with sympathy. I wanted to tell him that they would move on soon, but this was not the right time to say those words.

“Thank you for what you did. But we needed to accept the fact that she would never be back.” Henry turned his back on me and walked.

“I hope she will be happy where she is right now. And you would be happy as well,” he added before he could leave me alone. I frowned at what he said, I didn’t know why I felt that there was something in those words. Did he want to tell me to understand the other way around? But why didn’t he tell me the full details?

I went inside my home and took a bath. For the first time, Esther was inserted in my mind. Like how she talked to me, how she was always there for me. Did I miss that weak human? No… no way! I would never miss someone like her. But why did I feel different? I didn’t love her. I didn’t. I know I didn’t.

“I hated her. I hated her even more! Why did you do such stupid things? Why, Esther?” I punched the wall after I said those words. As memories came back, it made me hate her more. I wanted her gone in my life, but why should I feel this? She had an impact on me. It was not right. It would never be right.

I drowned myself in water. I needed to clear my mind. That pathetic woman shouldn’t be on my mind. I started to forget her. She had no room for my mind.

As I got up from my bathtub, I looked at the towel she gave to me. There was an embroidered name of mine. I took that and threw it in the trash. Everything that would be reminded of that weak human should be thrown. As I saw those shits, I remembered how she took her life. I didn’t want to blame myself for letting her do that. Her decisions should be my success. The day after tomorrow was my chance to be an Alpha, and then I would become the respected person in our pack. I would be busy with my job, and that woman would not be the talk of town, after weeks or months. So I shouldn’t worry about her. I know she is not dead, I could feel it.

After I got dressed, I went to my parents house, but they were not there. So I decided to go to Henry’s house when I found them lighting the candle in front of Esther’s picture. Henry hugged his mother, while she still cried over Esther. I looked at them with a blank face. I wanted to talk to them about what happened. I felt sorry for what they felt, but they needed to accept the fact that Esther would never be back. She would remain in their memories.

I let them finish what they started. I sat down and waited for them to talk to me. I gave them updates every time, for the whole week. But I would tell them that this would be the last day I would find that woman.

“Have some water.” Henry handed me a glass of water.

I cleared my throat. “I came here to give sympathy. I was sorry that I decided to give up. I wanted to see her, but I couldn’t. Sorry for your lost.” I bowed to them, just to make them feel that I was sincere.

The old woman handed her hand on my back, as if she comforted me. In fact, they should be the one I comforted. They loved that human.

“It was not your fault. If it was her fate, we would accept it. Thank you for your help. We know you loved our daughter, we are also sorry for your loss. It was not only us who lost her, you lost your Luna.”

Those words came from Esther’s mom, made my heart skip for a bit. I didn’t love her daughter. But she let those words out of her heart. I even felt the guilt of all the words I said to Esther.

“We decided to move on. From now on, we would never talk about my sister. We hoped she was happy where she was now. We decided not to talk about her, for the sake of our pack. We all lost our Luna,” Henry said while he looked at me straight. It gave me a strange feeling. Did he know something he didn’t want to discuss?

He looked at me like he had a secret that he didn’t want to tell us. What was it? Did he know where Esther was?