End of days

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

"We can say tomorrow that he died during the night, Leah Rose suggested. "Aye" Wyham agreed. "I will go now and confer with Sir Hugh. I want to know what plans he has made for Cardel's arrival."

"Tell me what happened to Rayford," Margaret implored "Sir Hugh's message was not very detailed."

Leah Rose when Wyham left.

Leah Rose related to Margaret how Rayford had been ambushed, the nature and extent of his wounds, and his recuperation. They sat by the bed talking quietly, Margaret's eyes rarely leaving Rayford's face. Wyham returned before supper to tell the women that Belwick agreed they should put Leah Rose's plan into action immediately.

That night, Margaret and Leah Rose remained closeted with Rayford in the bedchamber, as if they held a vigil over his dying body. Father Thomas was summoned in the early morning hours, purportedly to administer last rites, and was informed of the plan to entrap Cardel. After a few half-hearted objections over the deception of performing a sham funeral, which Wyham neatly deflected, the priest agreed to participate. Ironically, on the day he would publicly be pronounced dead, Rayford stirred and returned briefly to consciousness long enough to greet his mother and to consume some broth.

""Tis heartrending,” Elizabeth reported after dinner. "Everyone in the castle is overcome with grief. "Tis very difficult for me to watch the anguish of the people without telling them Rayford is alive."

"Elizabeth," Leah Rose said, "I know this is very hard on everyone, but it is absolutely

that no one but the eight of us know the truth."

Leah Rose remained secluded with Rayford as the castle community grappled with the news of his demise. On the day of his funeral, Leah Rose left him in Elizabeth's care as she sat next to Margaret during mass. Leah Rose wore a heavy veil covering her face, leaning heavily on Wyham's supporting arm and speaking to no one. She watched in silence as an empty coffin was lowered into the ground. After Rayford's burial, Leah Rose returned to their bedchamber as Elizabeth spread the news that she was overwhelmed with grief.

Leah Rose and Margaret shared nursing duties. Belwick and Wyham were the only visitors allowed. Everyone took care not to inform Rayford about the plan, waiting until he had completely regained his strength.

Rayford opened his eyes, the pain swamping him again, the waves pulsing through his body. Even the simple act of sitting up seemed beyond his present capabilities. Leah Rose and Margaret had both counseled him that his recovery would take time. It was easy for them to tell him to be patient-they were not the one lying here weak and broken. He hated this weakness, hated being powerless, hated being dependent. Hated this

fear. What if he died? What if he did not regain his strength? What if he were crippled?

Suffering was new to him. Of course, he had been wounded before, but nothing like this. Pain consumed him until he ceased to function, ceased to exist. How he hated his helplessness. "Rayford, you are awake." Leah Rose came to sit next to him on the mattress. "Would

you like some porridge?" "Nay." Even turning his head to look at her hurt.

"Rayford, you must eat to regain your strength." "I am not a babe. Do not tell me when to eat."

"As you wish."

Confound it. He could not even piss without help. "Get Stephan." "What do you need? I will help you."

"I do not want you. Get Stephan." He closed his eyes.

"I will call Renwold."

"I told you to get Stephan." "I will be right back, Rayford."

Finally, she was doing what he asked. Bile seized through his chest. He was not a

child.

Then the door opened. Renwold was trailing Leah Rose. Rage burned within him.

Could she not follow a simple direction?

"Leah Rose! I told you to get Stephan." "Stephan is not available, Rayford. Renwold will help you."

"Get out! Out, Leah Rose, out!"

She turned away and rushed toward the door. When Renwold, who had remained close to the exit, moved to follow her out, the flame within him exploded again. "Renwold, get over here. Now!"

"Mother."

His voice caused Margaret to break off her prayer. She opened her eyes and looked at her son. His eyes were still clouded, and the pinched lines around his mouth and between his eyebrows bore testimony to his continued suffering.

"How are you feeling, Rayford?" "How do you think I feel? I am in pain, and I cannot move without causing myself

more pain."

"Do not take that tone of voice with me, Rayford." Margaret tried to keep her voice quiet and without heat. "I have had enough of your surly attitude this week past. injuries do not excuse your bad temper. Especially toward those of us trying to help you. Especially toward Leah Rose, who has tended you with unselfish devotion and dedication." Your Her son refused to meet her eyes, looking instead over her shoulder, his mouth set in a mulish line. Margaret silently prayed for guidance. She needed to approach this with gentleness

and love. "Rayford, I know you are afraid..."

He jerked his head back, his eyes burning into hers. "I am afraid of nothing." "Are you not, my dear? Are you not afraid of dying?"

She looked steadily at him until he sighed and closed his eyes. He seemed to slump into himself as he leaned back onto the pillows.

"Rayford, you almost died, but God was merciful. He heard our prayers and spared you. My dear, you have no need to fear death. You were baptized as an infant, and I know that you believe in the Triune God. You have been saved by God's grace. You have His gift of eternal life."

"But I have not been a good man, and more often than not I have failed at being a good husband." The misery in his voice speared her heart.

"Rayford, you cannot add anything to your salvation by your own works. We can never be good enough to earn our salvation. Jesus has done it all for us. He paid the penalty for your sins with His death on the cross. Our salvation is by God's grace alone. 'Tis His free gift to us.