Hidden River

The Crash

Michael Outside The Book

---

The tree says to the moon where is the sun?

The moon replies, how should I know?

I keep not counsel with it.

I only go back and forth and quiz the tides where they should go.

---

I look; where am I looking? Alisa's walls are higher than I thought... They will take considerable force to pull them down, but what kind of force is required? My first tendency is to manufacture situations where they are forced into proximity. However, I know that's pointless; they're dancers, and emotional connection is their stock and trade.

I write on the wall of Michael Inside The Book's bedroom. “Good morning, how are you this fine day?”

"What does well enough mean?" Michael Inside The Book asks.

It means not good, not bad, just in between. Why?

"It's what Alisa said to Freddy yesterday. She seemed annoyed when she said it."

I write again “She means she's sad but doesn't want to say it. It also means don't ask.”

"So she lied?" Young Michael gasps

I write “Nothing is ever so black and white; she's protecting herself.”

"But Freddy wouldn't hurt her, would he?"

I respond “He wouldn't mean to, but you can't always depend on someone. Even if they want to stay, you can still lose them. At least that’s what Alisa believes.”

"That's really sad."

I nod “Yes, it is; now, look.”

Alisa is moving around her living quarters, getting ready for the day. When she is done, she walks down the stairs into the performance center and then up the stairs to her and Freddy's practice room.

Freddy

Alisa seems sore today, so I ask, "You okay?" I try to reach out to touch her, and she pulls back.

She says, "I'm fine"

I try again, and this time she doesn't try to stop me. I massage her neck and shoulders slowly. She's got knots miles deep into her shoulders and neck. She breaths slowly, then I hit a pressure point. She jumps, clearly in pain.

---

Alisa, why won't you let me in? No, that's not fair. I mean, we did meet not that long ago. I know if you gave me a chance, we could be... No, I don't know that for sure, but I know what it's like when we touch when we dance together.

We get so close we can hear the other's heart pounding in our chests. It's not just because we've been dancing. There's something here, but when I try to get closer, you pull away. You look down when I try to look you in the eye. Let your guard down, please.

---

Alisa

---

I can't get close to you, not after losing my best friend. I mean, my Dad was my best friend. Everything feels hollow, and I mean, would you ever look at me the same way again if you knew that I'd slept with Peter? I doubt it. I mean, the guy is a walking cliché, but he's the one guy I could sleep with and know that nothing more would be expected of me. I wonder what my Dad would think of all this? The thought makes me sick to my stomach. He would probably be disappointed in me; he would have liked you.

---

Freddy

---

I love dancing with you. Having you in my arms is heaven, but I can see you're a hair's breath away from bursting into tears at any given second. Knowing you slept with Peter... I know I love you; do you want to know how I know? Because even knowing that you did that, I still want you. I forgave you the second I saw you with him. It was easy for me to forgive you. If I'm honest, it wasn't even a choice. But God, did that break my heart. What more can I say? I'm just going to hold you the only way you'll let me, and when you're ready, I'll be here.

---

Michael Outside The Book

It's the end of the day. I can see Alisa's mind spinning like the dancing waves the air composes. She is so wrapped up in her own guilt that she can't even see the sun dancing off the lake or feel the sea breeze tugging at her hair. There is a rhythm tugging at my ears that has to be sung.

"Hello out there." My other self says.

“Hello” I write on the observation deck wall.

"I have a question," he asks.

“Then ask it.”

"Can you capture sounds in this world?"

“Yes, but you need a vessel.” I cause the words to dance in the air around him.

"What should I call you?” I can’t help but laugh.

“Michael” I scribe.

"No, really, what's your name?” He asks.

“That is my name. Think Michael”, I write as the words appear on his arm.

"Oh, you're me."

“Yes”

"Now about the sound.”

“Yes” He says.

“Look down there, see the bird?”

"I do"

“Call it to you just like you do at home and do the same with the sound.”

Michael Inside The Book

I watch as a word picture appears on the wall. I follow the instructions and call a bird to rise to me and pull in the notes of the wind song drifting by. I put them in the bird's mouth. The bird flies above Alisa's head and sings as it follows her on the boardwalk from her practice room to her condo.

After the bird has done its work, myself outside the book, writes on the wall to me how to spin the earth in the passage of time, rotating the clock from day to night and day again and again.

Freddy

She's sleeping with him regularly; I can see it in the way he teases her. I do everything I can not to let it affect me, but I want her. I don't think I'll ever stop wanting her. Peter, being the perceptive jerk he is, knows how I feel and takes every opportunity to rub it in my face.

Today, more than a month after I first saw them together, all the performers file into the practice hall at Brooks's request. I'll admit I'm puzzled as to why it's her and not Mr. Spencer.

She is standing on the floor in front of the stage.

She speaks up, "Good morning. Mr. Spencer left yesterday. There has been a family emergency, and he asked me to take over while he's gone. We will continue with the regular schedule. Any questions?"

Ali asks, "Did he say how long he'll be gone?"

Brook replies, "He doesn't know."

Lynn, ever kindness personified, inquires, "Did he say what's wrong?"

Brook shakes her head. "Just that."

And Peter the glory hound states, "What about opening night?"

Brook smiles knowingly. "Just as scheduled. Anything else? No, okay. Today I will be coming in periodically to check on routines and see how everything is going. That's all."

Michael Outside The Book

I dread today. I know what comes; I don't know what's worse, knowing the fact or feeling the aftermath. That is why I dreaded pushing Alisa through the portal to the death of her Father. I know she has to grow, and this growth pushes her to peace, but it still causes me pain in the moment to put her through it.

Michael Inside The Book

I am looking from my viewing deck. Everyone is busy getting ready. Colten gets up after Phoenix, and they both leave the room. I climb down my tree and walk across the same room.

Peter and Rowan are driving towards each other around the lake. There is a crash as they collide with each other. My other self writes instructions on the wall showing me how to pull the image of Peter in his car on the side of the road to myself.

I put my hand on Peter's chest as he slowly dies, singing a song over his stormy heart.