THE GIRL BOOK I

Book I, Chapter 6

The women act differently. The woman went to her appointment by herself. But, the man came with her. He thought he would be able to know what’s going on with the child. He didn’t remember what he told her. She kept the information about the child. ‘ How would you feel if the baby in my womb died ? ‘ The woman says to him. He was confused. He narrowed his eyebrows. He wanted to know what she asked.

He didn’t know what to say. He moved his body. He faced her. He glanced at her eyes. He wants to find the answer to why she asked. ‘ I really want to know what you think of it. That’s all ‘. The woman says to him. She knew what he was going to ask. He was surprised. The women watching him took a deep breath. She knew what his answer was. But, she didn’t think he would say it to her face.

If it’s another women; he wouldn’t say that to her. It was only her that he said it. She wants to know what she did wrong. Yes, it was unplanned for both of them. But, It was never a mistake. She didn’t want to kill a life inside of her. She didn’t want to abort the child. That’s not how she was raised to do it. Her face was emotionless. The man couldn’t read her. So, he told her what he was really thinking about.

‘ I would be one hundred percent happy, glad and relieved if the child dies in the womb or dies after the baby is born ‘. The man says to her. The women’s eyes were widened in shock. This was the first time a man would tell her this way. Usually any man she was with before; they would tell her they didn’t want to have a child with her. That way they didn’t waste her time. But, still have fun. While using conceptions. Even her first ex boyfriend would tell her that if she had an infant girl he would sleep with her. And she didn’t like it that way. It was disgusting.

The woman stares at the man through his eyes. She was about to say something when she opened her mouth. But, she stops herself from saying anything. She purses her lips closed. He watched her close her eyes as she took a deep breath. Then, she opened her eyes to face him. He could see there were no sparks in her eyes anymore. There wasn’t any happiness left in her. All the emotions in her face disappeared.

They stayed quiet. He grabbed her hand. But, she pulled away. He thought he saw a tear on her face. He blinked his eyes. ‘ Face me please! Why did you ask me that question ‘. The man says to her. The woman tries to calm her heart. It was too much. The darkness plagued her mind and heart. She took a deep breath. She didn’t say a word. She just shook her head to him in disappointment. She frowned for a while. He saw it. But, he didn’t say anything.

That was back then two years ago. Now, the man couldn’t read her. It was as if she closed herself to the world. He had never seen her breakdown before. Except his guy best friend saw her breaking down. He was the only one who saw her raw emotions. However, to himself; he couldn’t read her. He has to hear it from another person.

The Girl’s POV 2

I was a fool. A fool to believe that I was born for a reason. I was a fool to believe that people like me. I was a fool to believe the words of a man. A man who I choose to fall in love with. A man who leads me on thinking I have a chance. I waited for him to be ready. But, I see him flirting with every other girl. Why me? Why do I have to suffer? I wasn’t happy for years when I was born.

I didn’t want to be here anymore. Because; the body language of people tells me otherwise. I found out that my own mom regrets giving birth to me. I was a child. I didn’t know what that meant. I did everything that anyone wanted. I didn’t know that not everything is a rainbow and butterflies.

I try my best to muffle the sound of my cries. My heart was hurting. It’s on the breaking point. I was a fool to believe every word he said to me. Everything was a lie. I don’t understand why he would join in the relationship with me and my main boyfriend. I knew I wasn’t happy with my main boyfriend. I just wanted to focus on him first before anything else.

I don’t know how to react to my emotions. Because, I had to bottle up my emotions for so long. I laugh quietly. My life is so f****d up. Any man would walk all over me. They would take advantage of me. No matter what. There were always consequences. I scoff at the thought of it. I want to remove all of my emotions. So, I don’t feel this pain. My mind and heart is very vulnerable. I want it to die. So, I could become a heartless b***h that people want. It’s better this way.

// END OF THE GIRL’S POV 2 //

After, the man called off work; he hung up the phone. He did it because he thought the women would go to the job interview. His hands automatically know what to do. He was about to say something. But he stayed quiet. She turned to face him. He could tell she was still sleeping. ‘ Why do you have to be this beautiful? ‘ The man says to the woman.

The woman was so cute when she slept. He found out that the woman has sexsomina. The woman didn’t know that she had it. He uses his phone to look it up. He reads what it says on the website. ‘ like sleepwalking, sexomina is a parasomina, a sleep-related disorder that occurs when you’re in between deep, dreamless sleep and wakefulness ‘.

The man was surprised. He nodded his head in agreement with what it said. He continues to read it only to himself. It wasn’t barely a whisper though. ‘ Behaviors during an episode may include fondling, m**********n, s****l intercourse, pelvic thrusting and spontaneous orgasm ‘. The man’s eyes widened in shock. This happened to him before. He didn’t say no. Since, it was a woman who gave him consent.

He didn’t complain. He admits that he loves s*x. That’s why he didn’t stop when she asked for it. Or if she uses it as an excuse to cheer him up. It was the only thing that made him happy. It takes time for the women to make conversation. He knew that. That’s why he takes his time with her. Everything was in the wrong order. He remembers telling her that he does like her. But, he doesn’t know what to do. He doesn’t know if he likes her as a friend. Or more than that.

He has been telling her he wants to see other people. And that he blames her for everything. ‘ I want to make female friends. But, I cannot do that when you are here with me ‘. The man says to her. He yelled at her when he said that. The woman stays quiet. She didn’t say a word. She had earphones on her ears. Her phone was in her hand. All the man could see was the tears in her eyes. He saw it. He saw the women fighting the tears from falling.

He was about to say more. But, the uber was here. Here to pick her up. He doesn’t know what to do. Was it something he said? How can it be? He was speaking honestly about the truth. He was told by her to be honest with her. He was told to speak the truth. So that’s how he really felt towards her. She took a deep breath. She tries her best not to have his words affect him.

If that’s how he really felt then he would have told her that from the beginning. Then, the woman didn’t have to waste her time with him. She didn’t have to waste her time to get to know him. To be his friend. To be more than that. But, she was a fool to fall in love with him. It can’t be helped. Love is mysterious. It can do many things to anyone. She didn’t know she was in too deep.