The broken beta - healed by innocence

So sweet

*Briony*

I watch in horror as Wade disappears beneath the raging current. When he surfaces, he plows through the water until he reaches the back of the wagon. He wraps a hand around a wheel, then bends, his other hand disappearing under the water, and I wonder if he thinks he can lift the wagon, free it, and push it across the surging water.

Then the wagon groans and tilts further until it looks as though it might topple onto him. I ball my hands around his duster, silently urging him to leave the wagon, to escape the river.

As though he hears my pleas, he begins to fight the current. I barely have time to release my breath before I realize he isn’t heading toward shore, that his destination is the mules. Helplessly I watch as he struggles to release the mules.

An eternity seems to pass before one mule begins to wander toward the shore where I stand.

My heart leaps into my throat when I spot another log traveling quickly with the current. I scream out a warning at the same moment that one of the remaining mules sidesteps and shoves its shoulder against Wade.

He stumbles backward. The log rams into the base of his skull. Once again, the current drags him down.

I throw off his duster and jump into the river.

*Wade*

White light explodes in my head before the brown water sucks me under. I hear Briony’s scream, and dear Goddess, help me, I think I see her leap into the river.

I force back the pain, force back the welcome oblivion, and resurface to see her splashing in the water, screaming my name.

With long, swift strokes born of desperation, I swim toward her, fighting the current, fighting the fear.

If she loses her footing as I did, she'd go under the murky waters... and find herself surrounded by the darkness that terrifies her. No sunlight would filter through the churning river to guide her back to the surface. I want her to see another sunrise, to know again the feathery touch of dawn.

As I near, I can see the fear darkening her eyes. Gaining my footing, I snake out my arm, wrapping it around her waist and drawing her trembling body against mine.

The mud sucks at my boots as I haul her to the bank of the river and collapse in the muck, her body falling alongside mine, her breathing labored, my own chest aching as I fight to draw in air. With the blinding stars dancing across my vision, I rise up on an elbow and glare at the quivering she-wolf lying beside me. Her lips are incredibly blue in a face that is amazingly white. I press my wet body over hers, trying to warm her.

She lays her palm against my bristled cheek. “You’re safe,” she whispers.

“What the hell did you think you were doing?” I growl, my heart pounding wildly in my chest.

“I was going to save you.” She mumbles.

I thread my fingers through her tangled hair. She's lost her bonnet. She's damn lucky she hasn’t lost her life. “You little fool,” I rasp in a voice rift with emotion. “You brave little fool.”

My mouth swoops down to cover hers. Her cold, quivering lips part slightly, and I thrust my tongue through the welcome opening like a man desperately searching for treasure.

And treasure I find.

I gentle the kiss because she isn't a w***e whose body I want to use to gratify my lust. She is a she-wolf whose warmth I want to relish as it seeps through my body, touching my heart as none had before her. I want to feel the gentle swell of her curves as they press against the hard planes of my body. I want for just one moment to be young again and innocent. To have no knowledge of betrayal.

Her mouth is warm and sweet, so incredibly sweet. And small, just like the rest of her. She tastes so damn good. I savor her flavor the way a man might enjoy a glass of fine whiskey, leisurely, allowing the liquor to fill my mouth before releasing the brew, allowing it to burn my throat.

I touch my tongue to hers and hear her small sigh. She scrapes her fingers up the side of my face and weaves them through my hair. I've lost my hat as well, and for the first time since I’d been wounded, I welcome the absence of the shadows.

She smells of the river, but still I catch the slight scent that is hers and hers alone. I long to give my mouth the freedom to warm all of her, to kiss every inch of her.

She stops trembling from the cold, and I can feel the intoxicating warmth as our bodies pressed together. Another tremor passes through her body, a tremor that has nothing to do with the cold. I deepen the kiss, my hands bracketing her face, turning it so I can better the angle and touch her mouth with the intimacy of a long-time lover.

Kiss her as I’ve never kissed another. Kiss her as I have no right.

Drawing away, I gaze at her. Her eyes are dark with passion, her lips no longer blue, but red, a deep red, swollen from my kiss.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” I say in a low voice.

Hurt plunges into the depths of her eyes. Gingerly, I remove my fingers from her tangled hair. “I’ll get a fire going.”

I struggle to my feet and stagger to the place where she’d left my duster. I snatch it up, return to her side, and spread it over her as she lays there staring at me. A coldness seeps through my flesh and wraps around my heart. I go in search of something… anything... with which I can build a fire.

*Briony*

I sit up and slip into the duster, drawing it tightly around me. It carries his scent of horses and leather.

I touch my fingers to my trembling lips. I had always imagined that Chase Moonshadow would be the first to kiss me. But I had never imagined the kiss would be like the one I had just received, that it would make me feel so warm, so scared, so safe. All the feelings jumbling around inside me make no sense.

I watch as Wade builds a fire nearby. I wait until he's brought the fire to life, just as he's brought feelings to life within me.

I rise to my feet, walk to the fire, and kneel beside him. "I suppose I shouldn't have kissed you back."

"No, you shouldn't have," he says tersely, never taking his eyes away from the smoldering fire. "But I figure you were probably just scared and not thinking."

"Were you scared?" I ask.

*Wade*

I feel my stomach clench. By the Goddess, I am terrified, more now than when I had seen her rushing into the river. That kiss has me shaking clear down to my boots.

I had expected her to be sweet. I hadn't expected her to be everything I'd ever dreamed of when I was younger and deserved dreams.

Damn Chase! Damn him to hell for wanting she-wolves in addition to cattle, land, and wealth. Damn him for wanting this she-wolf, for earning the right to have her.

I shove myself to my feet. "I need to round up the mules. You stay here and dry off."

My long strides can’t take me far enough, fast enough. Her flowery scent follows me like a shadow. The lingering taste of her lips taunts me, makes me hungry for more. I can still feel the soft swells of her breasts shifting beneath my chest. My fingers ache to hold them, shape them, and caress them with a tenderness I’d never known existed.

I release a shudder as I skid down the muddy bank. I need a sporting she-wolf. I’ve gone too long without spending myself on a she-wolf. That's the reason I find this journey so damn difficult, the reason I want to hold Briony close. I just need to purge my longings. Maria would help me. She always does. She would douse all the flames, and in total darkness, I would take her without passion, without love, without hope. And in the darkness, she couldn’t see the ugliness that made me the man I am.

I don’t want Briony to see the ugliness, either, but she will. Sooner or later, she will.