The broken beta - healed by innocence

Visiting family

*Briony*

As the wagon rumbles over the uneven ground, I cling tenaciously to the seat. I am regaining my strength with each passing day, and with each passing mile, I grow closer to Wade.

I know I shouldn’t have these feelings. I know I can’t have these feelings. I signed a contract stating I would travel west to marry Chase. I don’t think he is a man prone to breaking contracts or dismissing them. I was wallowing in the depths of despair, my world closing in on me, my options dwindling when I received his letter of hope. I owe him for lifting me out of the mire into which the war had dropped me, for altering my destiny.

I read his letters each night before I go to sleep, trying to hold an image of the man within my heart, but it is Wade I hear whimper in the hours past midnight, it is Wade I sneak out of the tent to watch sleeping.

He never seems truly at rest. As he sleeps, beads of sweat coat his face and neck. He begins to breathe hard as though he were running a great distance.

I tell him I awake early to appreciate the sunrise, but the truth is I enjoy those moments before dawn when the sun’s feathery fingers touch his face and his breathing calms as though in sleep he recognizes that he’s survived another night.

I spot the small log cabin near dusk. My heart trips over itself when I see the few cattle grazing in the fields beyond. “Are we already at Chase’s ranch?” I ask.

“Nope. Just stopping to look in on some of Chase’s neighbors.” Wade says. “Family, basically.”

“So we’re close.” I say hopefully.

“Nope. Out here, anyone you pass along the way is considered a neighbor.” He pulls the wagon to a halt between the house and a weathered barn.

I sigh. “You said family, basically?”

“Well our cousin Norah is married to an Alpha, Damon… Dean here is his brother, and Julieta his sister.” He explains.

“Okay…” something hit me. “Wait, his brother… and his sister?”

He chuckles. “Dean is his brother by blood, but he grew up in Julieta’s family… that is how Dean and Julieta met.”

“Ahh, okay.” I mumble.

A tall handsome man holding a rifle steps out of the house. He cups a hand over his brow and squints against the setting sun. “Wade, that you?”

"Yep, Chase told me to stop by." I watch Wade climb off the wagon and hold his arms up to me.

I scoot over the bench as he ambles over. "You got you a she-wolf there?" the man asks.

Wade wraps his hands around my waist and lifts me to the ground. "Yep. Miss Starweaver is betrothed to Chase. He busted his leg. Sent me to fetch her."

The man's face splits with a wide grin. "Well, I’ll be. She a heart-and-hand she-wolf?"

"Yep," Wade confirms.

"Chase sure got himself a pretty one, didn’t he?" Dean says, winking at me.

"Reckon he did," Wade responds quietly. "Miss Starweaver, this here’s Dean Morningstar."

I smile, brushing my hand over my dusty skirt and toying with the brim of Blaise’s hat. At the moment, I imagine I look anything but pretty.

"Julieta, we got company!" Dean calls out.

A young, dark-haired she-wolf, who looks like she might be Mexican, rushes onto the porch, wiping her hands on her apron. A little girl, with a rag doll draped over her arm, clutches the woman's skirt and peers around her. "For the Goddess’ sake, Dean, don't just stand there. Invite them in for supper."

I glance at Wade. He gives me a brusque nod. "I'll see to the animals' needs, then I'll join you."

Dean trails after Wade as he leads the mules to a trough. I stroll to the house.

The woman's smile widens. "I’m Julieta." She rests her hand on the child's dark head. "This is Sarah. She’s three years old and into everything."

I kneel before the child. She has her father's eyes, her mother's dark hair. "Hello, Sarah. I’m Briony."

Sarah holds out her doll. "This is Mary Margaret."

I touch the doll's cloth arm. "She's very pretty, just like you."

Sarah presses her face against her mother's skirt and giggles.

"You'll have to forgive her shyness. We don't get much company out here." Julieta says softly.

I rise to my feet. "I guess that's something I'm going to have to get used to."

"I never expected Wade to take a mate." She says.

"Actually, I'm going to marry Chase." I tell her.

Julieta's eyes widen. "Chase? Have you met him?"

I shake my head. Julieta slaps her hand over her breast. "Handsome as sin." She eyes me speculatively. "Are you a heart-and-hand she-wolf?"

"I just heard Wade say I was, so I guess I am, although I’m not sure what that is." I admit.

Julieta slips her arm through mine and leads me into the house. "A mail-order mate. Cowboys call them heart-and-hand she-wolves because most place their orders from The Heart and Hand.” She makes a motion with her free hand. “Our little house might not look like much, but what I have here is all I need."

The furniture seems carefully crafted. The fire crackles in the hearth. The room smells of freshly baked bread and cinnamon.

Julieta reaches into a cabinet and brings out wooden bowls, setting them at the square oak table. She picks up Sarah and plops her into a chair that's taller than the others. "Dean made all the furniture."

"It's lovely." I say.

"He works hard, trying to keep me happy. I imagine Chase will do the same for you." She smiles warmly.

I return her smile. "I only know Chase through correspondence. I was hoping to learn more about him as we traveled, but Wade isn't very talkative."

Julieta looks at me, complete understanding reflected in her eyes. "Oh, Briony, not many of the men out here are. They won’t ask you for the time of day. They figure if you want to share that information, you'll take out your pocket watch and tell them."

"Why do you think they are like that?" I ask.

Julieta brings a pot from the hearth and ladles stew into the bowls. "I think it’s because a lot of the men came here after the war to start over. Or they had a past they weren't particularly proud of. A lot of them change their names, or just go by their first names. No one questions them. That's why they come out here. If they want to be alone, they're left alone."

"And if they don't want to be alone?" I ask.

Julieta smiles. "Then they order themselves a mate." She places the pot on the table and returns to the hearth, bringing back a black pan that holds something that reminds me of a yellow cake.

"Corn dodgers and stew," Julieta explains. "It's not fancy, but it's filling and out here the men need something that fills up their bellies." She looks past me and points a finger. "Keep that dust out there where it belongs!"

Dean and Wade stomp their feet on the porch for a minute before walking in and taking their seats. I sit beside Sarah, across from Wade, who has angled his chair so he sits with the scarred side of his face away from the table.

When Julieta takes her chair, everyone bows their heads.

"Dear Goddess," Dean begins, "thank you for bringing company to take the burden of talking off me for a day or so. Amen."

Grinning, he looks up at Julieta. She wags a finger at him. "You were listening at the door."

"No, my darling, but I've been married to you long enough to know poor Miss Starweaver here is gonna get her ear chewed off before the evening's over." He grins.

"Please, call me Briony." I say.

He blushes slightly before digging into his stew.

Julieta places her hand over mine and squeezes. "You'll have to forgive me," she says. "As much as I love Dean, I miss a she-wolf voice from time to time."

I cast a furtive glance Wade's way. He watches me in seeming innocence, but I wonder if Chase had indeed told him to stop by here or if he is just trying to bring home his point regarding the absence of company in this part of Texas.

"I think you're delightful," I say with all sincerity. "And I know what it is to long for a gentle voice."

I receive a good dose of what Wade endures each evening as Julieta fires off questions, one after another. She wants to know about life back East, the journey on the train, and how fashions have changed.

“Where is Diego?” Wade says, then he looks at me. “Diego is Julieta’s son, he is 9.”

“He has gone with Damon and Norah to visit the pack in England,” Dean says, then explains for my benefit. “His aunt and uncle.”

Wade nods. “Bet he is enjoying himself.”

When Dean's bowl is empty, he leans back in his chair and asks a question only Wade can answer. "How many head of cattle does Chase have now?"

Wade glances up from his stew. "Around two thousand."

Dean releases a low whistle. "Have him send word if he needs some help getting 'em to market. I could bring Julieta to the ranch and she and Briony here could visit."

"I'll let him know." Wade says.

"Dean, why don't you drag out the bundle board? We'll let Briony and Wade sleep in the bed tonight. You and I can sleep in the loft." Julieta says.

My heart slams against my ribs. I think the intimacy surrounding me and Wade as we sat beside a campfire will pale in comparison to the intimacy that would surround us if we slept in the same room, the same bed, beneath the same covers.

Dean clears his throat. "I'm not sure that would be proper, Julieta. Usually, we pull the bundle board out when the two people are engaged."

"Don't be silly. Chase trusts Wade, or he wouldn't have sent him to get Briony. And she must trust him, or she wouldn't be traveling with him. Nothing will happen in that bedroom that couldn't happen on the trail."

Dean shrugs. "I reckon you got a point there."

"I appreciate the kindness, but I'll sleep in the barn," Wade says.

"Nonsense," Julieta says, slapping her hand on the table for emphasis. "When was the last time you slept in a bed?"

Wade looks as though he's been trapped which I realize he has been. He can't even claim to have slept in a bed while we were in Fort Worth.

"A while, but I'm used to sleeping on the ground."

"Then tonight you will sleep in a bed, and we'll prepare you each a bath. A good hot meal, a hot bath, and a soft bed. I would have sold my soul for those when I was traveling out here. It warms my heart to be able to offer them to you."

I meet Wade's gaze, and I can tell he's looking for an honorable way out of the situation. I know I should help him find one. But he has made one sacrifice after another for me on this trip. Surely Chase wouldn't find fault with me for making this one sacrifice for Wade.

"I truly appreciate your generosity, Julieta," I say quietly. "I would love to have a hot bath."

Julieta slaps her hand on the table in front of her daughter. "Sarah, stop staring. It's not polite."

I glance down at the little girl. She bows her head, but I can see that her eyes are still fixed on Wade.

Wade pushes his bowl back. "It was a fine meal, ma'am. If you'll excuse me, I need to check on the mules." He scrapes the chair across the floor, stands up, and heads out the door.

Julieta sighs. "It's such a shame he had to get wounded like that, but I imagine Chase sleeps better at night."

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"It's not unusual for a mail-order mates to meet someone along the way and never make it to the man who sent for her. I imagine Chase figured that wouldn't happen if he made Wade come after you. You're not going to fall in love with him."