Epitome of a Hero

As I am

Ever since I was born, the world just kept treating me unfairly and even my own being started to plush me out of my own existence.

But everything changed when I was welcomed in a body of a different person in a seemingly another world.

I lifted my hands up the sky as I laid my back on the hard ground of the rooftop. The sky was so clear and since the sun was shining ah so brightly up ahead, I peeked through the spaces of my hand while I watched the clouds roll by.

Each clump of cloud just passes my range of vision and each time they become smaller and smaller--- they are condensing.

Maybe one day I will be just like a cIoud that will continuously pass this life in a small span of time before disintegrating  back to where I really belong.

I am supposed to be dead…

Should I be afraid to go once my time is up?

I put my hand down, closing my eyes, trying to calm myself down before going back to train for the new club. After the meeting the past few days, Mr. Daniel  assigned trainings during weekends.

And ever since that day, the green eyed man and me had been talking a lot.

Apparently, his name is Michael…

The talk didn’t mean a literal ‘talk’ though. Sometimes in the club, we just sat beside each other with silence and he’d just hand me forms to fill up and then walk through the canteen beside me after meetings.

He was silent.

I didn’t mine though.  

This body doesn’t react differently to other guys except for Kyle. And because of that, I had similar feelings. We have been texting too.

I remembered the last text he sent me today saying ‘Good luck on your training! Take care of yourself. J.

“You can’t always go on talking comfortably to him on phones then in real life, Triz or you’ll miss the fun of it.”

I whispered to myself, kind of surprised. I never thought I’d say that. Silly Damian.

“Why are you giggling to yourself?”

A man startled me with his voice so my eyes flung open. It’s Michael. I didn’t even hear his footsteps! Where did my warrior senses go?

He towered over me as he looked down on me who was lying flat on the ground. His green shining due to the rays of the sun.

“I have a wide imagination,” I mumbled and sat down, trying to reach my back to remove any dust with the handkerchief. I tried hitting my back with the hanky when Michael bent down on one knee and grabbed the handkerchief from my hand.

He then wiped my back with the hanky and as he did, he was just silent and I just stared at him. His hair was tied up on the back of his head while some of the thin strands laid on his forehead. And from this view, he kind of looked--- handsome.

My lips curled into a smile and thanked him after he wiled my back.

“I still have 30 minutes to rest here,” I said as I invited him to sit down beside me and he did.

For about 5 minutes, we didn’t talk and it was very calming at first but the silence was starting to deafen my soul so I just think of something that I could say.

“Thank you for the past few weeks, about what you did on the canteen,” I mumbled and he just gazed at me after a nod

“You weren’t like this before.”

Michael, all of a sudden, had his brow furrowed, looking as if he finds the situation hard to believe.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“Tricia never stepped up against those bastards. She was a coward.”

The wind stopped as he said those words and I was left stunned by them. But at the same time I was angry.

“She wasn’t a coward. Those kids who just did her wrong were all foolish enough to pick on someone with a good soul. They are the coward ones.”

I argued and he did something I found so intriguing. He didn’t even dare to argue but he just smiled at me. It was my first time seeing him smile. And the thought wasn’t just mine. It was also hers.

“Who are you right now?” Michael asked without a hint of sarcasm in his voice. He was serious. How did he even know? Is he really serious? What does he mean who I am right now? Will he believe if I tell him who I am?

Maybe I could try to tell him the truth and joke it out right after.

“Damian Hope,” I exclaimed and his eyes never faltered as he stared into mine.

“Tell me more,” Michael quoted and I was taken aback by his words. Did he…did he really believed that…?

I huffed and shook my head as if I was joking but he just stared at me, making me feel as if I needed to disclose that information which I have never told anyone anymore.

“I am a swordsman from another world.”

Michael seemed interested while I spoke to him so I continued, starting from when I was born, through all the things I have experienced, to my being a knight, into the wars I’ve fought--- and through my death.

To my surprise, the boy never left my words unheard. He listened to every bit of what I said and you can even grasp what he felt for every event.

“We were ambushed by the rebels and from that my fellow soldiers were killed…”

The sight of Duke and the other men  visited my mind, making me feel like I was back at the day when I was killed.

My breath started to rush out of me but Michael snapped me out of my panic when he placed his hand on mine which I didn’t know was crumpling the ends of my short.

“You have been a brave and courageous girl.”

Michael said and I just stared at him, feeling my tears pool out of my eyes. I have been brave… but was I really courageous even though I threw away all those who loved me just so I couldn’t be burdened with my emotions…?

I shook my head and shut my eyes closed to stop my tears but he pulled me to him for an embrace, making me unable to stop my pouring emotions.

“You did what you had to do… so you should have no regrets at the past. At that time, it’s what you feel was right, so it is what you’ve got to do. There was nothing wrong with you--- the world is just f****d up.”

From that moment, I cried all of the feelings I’ve hidden ever since I got here. He’s got a point…

But being able to feel this way, this comfort that I never had the chance to feel before made me think that all I ever did was wrong…

And feeling everything she is able to feel now that I am embodying her soul makes me jealous…

I cried until I was sober in the arms of this boy who figured out that I wasn’t her in just a short span of time.

This was also the first time where I got comforted by someone as my own and nobody else.

****

“Hey Dad!” I barged into the room, not feeling any tense on my muscle or whatsoever after the training. Letting out my feelings lately made me feel lighter and even more delightful of being here.

After we talked earlier, we went back to our original ways of communicating to one another--- by just being silent as we stand beside each other during trainings and breaks. The other boys were kind to me as well but Michael was like tied to me like a rope for the entire meeting.

I don’t know what his deal was but after I told him who I really was, it made me comfortable that he was there. Because at least, there was someone that knew me for who I really was.

“How’s the club kiddo?” Dad asked and so I told him about how we learned about the basics of Taekwondo. Damn, I even demoed some of the stretching and foot works that I have learned.

I was quite happier today.

The old man and I had dinner together and right after that we watched a game. It was a good time and I felt like I really had a father to begin with. If only the King treated me as a daughter, maybe I wouldn’t have been so jealous…

But while I am here, I will make sure that I’d help you, Triz …

“Never throw away these relationships just because you are afraid of feeling the pain of losing them someday…”