Drowning in You

2

RAVEN

I can’t believe I just ran into him. I hadn’t even talked to him since that day he sat next to me at my usual lunch table. I mean I’m not complaining, I liked being alone. Oh, who was I kidding? I hated it! It wasn’t like I wanted to be alone, I just ended up that way. No one talked to me because they thought I was weird and creepy. I mean I get it, I kind of give off that vibe. But that doesn’t mean I like to be alone, but I am comfortable alone. I don’t know how to explain it. It’s almost like when I am around other people I feel pressured to act happy even when I’m not. I don’t like that, and I really don’t know what happy feels like anymore, I haven't felt that in years, so I find it hard to pretend. It’s almost as if a teacher tells you to write an essay about something that you don’t understand and have never heard of. It’s hard and even if you finish it everyone knows you just bullshitted your way through it and end up making a fool out of yourself. That’s why I don’t spend time around other people, to avoid the bullshit. If I don’t interact then I don’t have to pretend.

I look over my shoulder to see if he is still there, he is. He stopped in the hallway after I ran into him and I think he’s looking for me. I don’t think he’ll notice me, no one ever really does. I just blend into the shadows. They might glance at me once in a while but they never truly see me. I watch Oliver for another second before I continue walking down the hallway toward my mythology course. I don’t know what it is about her class but it is always the best part of my day, other than when I’m sitting in the hallway up against the wall and I notice Oliver watching me. He was the only one that actually saw me when I normally was invisible.

I sat in my usual spot in the back of the classroom and put my headphones on and switched to some Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. I love this band, their music is always exactly what I need. I space out for a while until I notice movement at the door. Someone was standing in front of the window in the door watching me, it was Oliver. When our eyes met he gave me a smirk and a small wave and then continued walking down the hallway. How often does he watch me like that?

        I stared down at my desk and thought of every time I had noticed him watching me. There were a lot. I'd have to ask him about that one day.

OLIVER

As I was walking down the hall I saw him through the window. I stopped and watched him sitting in his usual place as his head nodded to the music he was listening to. His head stopped nodding and he slowly turned his head to meet my gaze. I smirked at him and gave him a small nod and then I started walking down the hallway again. There was just something in those deep brown eyes that made me want to get closer to him. I just loved those eyes.

When I got back to my class all I could do was think of Nico, his eyes, the way he spaces out, the way he hides behind his black bangs. I love how he walked confidently but still managed to keep his head low, almost as if he was trying to distance himself from everyone. Right then I promised myself that I was going to get closer to Raven, starting with me meeting up with him after class. 

RAVEN

I was shaken out of my daydreams by the sound of the bell signaling the end of class. I gathered up all of my stuff and started walking for the door. As I exited my path was instantly blocked by Oliver. I almost ran into him but I stopped just in time. I mumbled my apology and tried to walk around him but he swung his arm around my shoulders and started walking with me.

“What are you doing?” I asked thoroughly confused. No one ever walked with me let alone in this position. As we walked people glanced at us strangely, the attention made me anxious. I tried to shrug off his arm but he wasn’t having it, he gripped his hand to my shoulder.

“So what do you got planned for today after school, Raven?” Oliver asked nonchalantly.

I blushed slightly at the personal question and said, “I dunno. I'll probably just go home and watch a movie.”

“That sounds fun! Why don’t I meet you after school and then we can go over to my place and watch a movie instead?” He asked happily. Oliver is weird. No one ever wants to spend time with me, let alone invite me over to their house.

“I guess? Where do you wanna meet up?” I asked slightly confused. Why is he acting like this? Does he really want to spend time with me? I don’t really know what to do in this sort of situation. I’m not really equipped to deal with people. I really don’t wanna go. I don’t like being around people for long periods of time. Trust me, if I could get away with not coming to school at all then I wouldn’t be in this situation right now. Maybe I didn’t really have to go. Maybe I could just tell him I would and then just not show up at the meeting point. I could just ditch him.

Oliver walked with me to my next class and then smiled and waved at me as I disappeared through the doorway. Throughout my class, I couldn’t help but think about Oliver. I remembered how we first met and how he told me that he thought we were alike. How he just didn’t care enough to mix with other people. I was the exact opposite, although he would probably never guess it. It wasn’t that I didn’t care enough, it was that I cared too much. I cared about who I was when I was around other people. I wasn’t myself, no one liked the real me. But maybe he might like the real me. I thought to myself. I shook the thought from my mind. I don’t really know anything about Oliver, and he doesn’t really know anything about me. Anything that I might think I know about him is just built on either what he wants people to know about him or gossip.