Loving Lisbeth Salander (XIV Series #1)

The Girl and Her Scribble I

“Her eyes are blue, Harv!” I exclaimed and the memory of her picturesque beauty flashes in the core of my head. If I had a camera that time, I would have took her picture but I didn’t and I didn’t want to piss her more than I already was. I could tell from the tone of her voice that I was starting to get in her nerves but I’ve seen a lot of movies. And I can say that most annoying characters get the best first impressions regardless of how negative it may appear to the other party. “From a far, it looks like black but her eyes are really really blue.” The memory, the picture over her deep blue eyes were stuck in my head. It was almost poisoning me. Every time my eyes are closed, all I could see was hers, looking right back at me. “They even get brighter and more beautiful when hit by the sun.” A smile crept out of my face as I spoke and reminisced that moment I had with her. “It’s the most beautiful blue I’ve ever seen in my life.” And that speak a lot from someone who loves looking at the ocean’s soothing color. “It’s not like a normal blue that people see. It’s absolutely breath-taking.”

Harvey, however, wasn’t as impressed as I hoped. He wasn’t even the least interested in everything I was saying. I’d take this was how Forest perceived me as well. His eyes were droopier than I remembered, and they weren’t as mad as they did the last time I kept babbling about her, Forest – as a matter of fact, they were a lot madder than I remember. His hatred towards her was overpowering everything we had in our friendship. I felt that just by watching his gestures the moment I stopped talking to see how he reacted. “Is that supposed to make me approve of whatever admiration you have for this demon?” Is it? “For God’s sake, Mark, just stop already! You’re making me puke my guts out hearing you talk so giddily about that woman.” He shivered at his statement. “I’d rather listen to you talk about those bible verses you used to preach me every single day, I swear. Just bring that back.”

I laughed at this. “You’re more bored of me talking about them than her. At least I get some sort of reaction from you, regardless of how negative it is, that see you get bored with your eyes half open.”

He shook his head, hissing.

I sheepishly looked down, pressing my lips together and remember manning up to approach her that day. “I like spending time with her.”

He gave me a glare of disgust.

“I can’t stop myself, Harvey. It’s my heart acting for me,” I said under my breath, bringing my hands up to my chest and feeling my heart beating against it. “Believe me, I really tried to not walk up to her and say the most awkward, uncomfortable hi I’ve ever greeted someone, but I just can’t stay put when I know I have the chance to be with her, and talk to her.”

He sighed and looked away for a moment before turning back to me with a disappointed look. “Does she even know you?” Maybe? “Not intentionally I bet.” He answered his question with how he think it was playing out for me. I guess, he was right about it too… “Does she even want you around her?” Well— He exclaimed and every word just broke my heart knowing how brutal yet so true those words he was saying are. “Probably not but that’s okay because I don’t want you spending your time with her!” Reminds me of what she told me yesterday too. “You’re gonna waste your time convincing a demon to chop off its horn because they won’t do it no matter how much you talk them into it.”

I looked down miserably. Forest already rejected my kindness for her many time when we talked and hearing Harvey’s realistic point of views only broke me even further. I haven’t even gotten the chance to fully give it a shot, and I’m already being told that I have a better chance at winning the lottery than her heart. Or maybe it was just because I couldn’t convince Harvey to see Forest the way I see her. Either way, I already lost when I haven’t even tried to prove my worth for her and Harvey’s undeniable reality slaps for me.

“You’re not saying anything because you know I’m right.”

He was right, alright. I frowned and stared at my untouched food. I suddenly felt too full even if I was so hungry before we came here. Thoughts can truly change a person’s feeling in a blink of an eye. One moment, you’re the happiest; the second, you can’t even hide your sadness anymore. But I wasn’t going to let a measly thought ruin my chances when I just started shooting my shot.

“Hi, Mark.”

I looked up and saw Connie passing by with her friend. “Hello, Connie.” I smiled as I greeted her with a small wave in the air. “Is the meeting pushing through this afternoon?” I asked when I remembered about the council meeting for an event we were preparing for.

She nodded. “I’ll hand out briefing sheets during the meeting itself.”

“Alright,” I replied, bobbing my head.

“See you then.” She smiled before she completely passed us by with her friend, and I sat there watching their backs fade into the crowd. I was spacing out. Everything Harvey and Forest said were sinking to me just now. When I snapped back to reality, I diverted my attention back to the food laid in front of me with a heavy sigh.

“What was that about?” He asked as soon as I sat.

“Meeting later.” I answered briefly, scratching the back of my head. I was having troubles stomaching the food I was trying to eat. “I think they’re planning a huge event for the university for the Intercollegiate.”

Harvey suddenly leaned closer, gesturing me to lean closer to him as well. “Why can’t you just like Connie instead? You’re both honor rolls, and student council officials. You’re perfect for each other. ”

I glared at Harvey, a little taken aback by what he just said.

“You’re basically the perfect match!”

I gulped, frowning at the thought of being with Connie. Let alone date her. It doesn’t look too… pleasing for me. “Connie Scott? Really?” I wheezed in disbelief. “You know she’s not my type, Harv.”

“Then, what is? Please, do tell.” He arched his brows at me in dismay.

Now that he asked, I wasn’t sure myself what my type was. I guess, I don’t really have one. “When I like someone, I like someone. I don’t have the specifics but I know when I do.” I explained, shrugging at his question.

He hissed at me, squinting his eyes at me. “The girl obviously likes you, Mark. Don’t tell me you don’t realize that. Or feel that.”

Well, I do know that she likes me considering that she even confessed her feelings before, and asked me to date her which I deliberately refused to do. It was heartless of me to reject someone like Connie, who was adored by many other guys in the campus, but I didn’t want to date her without the intention of reciprocating her feelings. Connie Scott is one of the most admired girls in our school. Everyone thinks that her natural, wavy, brown hair suited her well. People envy her sense of fashion. Her intelligence. And her leadership. Everyone liked her so much that everything she does was important and looked up to. Which means, if I treat her like crap, I become the bad guy who chose a demon over a princess, which doesn’t sound like a bad thing but might be offensive in some angles. Princesses are overrated and they’re too – fluffy… and soft for me to take care of. They just seem more fragile and harder to take care of. “I don’t feel comfortable with her. I don’t like how popular she is.”

He raised a brow at me, twitching. “What are you talking about? You’re popular among your college too? Even in other departments, people know you.”

I shook my head in disagreement. I don’t see myself as one of the popular guys in the school. People just casually throw that title over anyone they see fit their criteria. “She’s too overrated for me,” I defended with full honesty. I didn’t want to give anyone false hopes just as much Forest did to me.

Harvey snorted and looked at me in disapproval. “Are you for real, Mark?”

I shrugged, unsure why he had such reaction when he knew I was rooting him for her. “There’s just no spark. Or butterflies in my stomach when I’m with her.”

“Sparks don’t exist, brother. Neither do butterflies in your stomach. That doesn’t happen.” He firmly shook his head to emphasize his point.

“It does and I felt them when Forest first took my drink.” I said, recalling that moment I had with her with a smile on my face. “Like an explosive inside my body – like fireworks.”

He looked at me with disgust, his face cringing as I spoke.

“You’ll understand all these feelings once you meet the person who’s gonna make you feel like that.” I added, gazing at his direction and smiling.

He exaggerated the shiver he must have felt upon hearing my response. “That’s probably the cringiest thing you’ve told me for the past twenty years I’ve spent my time with you. Stop with your Romeo and Juliet drama. You’re not Shakespeare or any other romance writers out there.”

“I was just stating an argument to prove the existence of sparks and butterflies.”

“Now you’re Plato too?” He exclaimed and shook his hand in the air. “God. Please let me be friends with someone else in my next life. Someone who isn’t as crazy as the person I’m with right now.” He prayed, closing his eyes and holding his hands together.

But they really did feel like fireworks that night.

That night I won’t ever forget.

Where are you, Chris? I asked myself as I roamed around the house like a newbie tuna squeezing itself in the small tin can of a swarm of drunk junkies. The place was full and if it weren’t for my brother, I wouldn’t even be here, and I blame mom for thinking that we can actually get along better if I tagged along with him every time he lies about going to a group study or a normal hang out with his friends. This isn’t a normal hangout. This isn’t normal even for someone like me who is, well, socially accepted and admired in school.

I sighed making myself through the crowd that don’t care about hitting each other. So this is what wild parties really look like. I wouldn’t have known. I thought teenage parties in movies were exaggerated but I stand corrected. This is terrible than I expected, but I wouldn’t really expect it to be like a birthday party with decent people, who would clap and sing for you as you blow your birthday candle, no. Looking at every student I came across with, I wouldn’t have thought that they were my age. They all look like people in their 30s in a bar with shots in their hands and reeking of strong alcohol.

The place reeks of different kind of drinks, a hint of smoke and other substances I wasn’t aware of. For I know, people have already farted in here for, per say, approximately twice. It smelled so bad, I had to cover my nose with my arm as I pass through a crowd that doesn’t seem to fan out anytime soon.

“Chris!”

I yelled when I spotted him on a kitchen counter with an unfamiliar girl with her legs wrapped around his waist. I turned to look at the girl without making it seem judgmental. She looked like a girl you could pick outside a bar no matter how much I try to convince myself that she could be a decent woman who goes to church every Sunday. But you can’t go to church with a dress that shows almost half your chest area, shows half your butt cheek too. She was the worst possible woman you could encounter and be screwed over the next morning.

I gently tapped my brother’s shoulder from the back, hoping I wasn’t interrupting his make-out session with this girl I never knew he was seeing. “Let’s go home. Mom’s going to kill both of us if we don’t get back home by ten!” I tried to whisper. The music was so loud. I can barely hear my own voice.

Chris didn’t look too happy that he saw me. It was evident that he wasn’t even planning to go home before six in the morning. I knew that the moment we set foot in this place, and he promised to go home with the given time. He whispered something to the girl which made her free him from her wide open legs. “Why don’t you just go ahead? I’ll just make something up when I get home. I can’t leave the party. Nothing even happened yet.” I was the burden to him. I could see it from the way he looked at me. “It’s only starting!”

I sighed nervously.

“So just go home and forget about me, a’right?”

“But—” He gave me a pat before approaching his girl again. I gritted my teeth in dismay. I would have just stayed home and watched something more meaningful than this. I turned away and wondered what I should do inside the car while waiting for my brother who apparently was a big fan of parties like these. I should just purchase an e-book online or something. Yes. I’m going to do that.

Just as I was walking out to the door to leave the house, I heard a loud call from my back.

“Hey, kid!”