Foresaken Lovers

Chapter Five

I took a deep breath of the barely chilled air as I made my way into the clearing, the buzz of the forest and its magic around me. Soaring oak trees surrounded the small patch of green grass while the occasional wildflower sprung up in random places. Small animals occupied the thickets at the perimeter of the clearing, rustling around and breaking what would be a rare silence.

At the center of the space was a small, squared-off stone and nothing else, the grass was a fair bit sparser at the base of the stone than the rest of the clearing, having not had a chance to fully grow in the past months. The oaks stood silent vigil over the modest grave, draping it with their shade and allowing the sun's rays to pierce between its leaves.

I walked steadily toward the grave, my boots barely making a sound against the soft pasture. I sat myself down at the foot of the patch of sparse grass, keeping one leg bent and my respective arm draped over it while my other leg was bent under it on the grass. I shifted my leg before groaning and pulling the small dagger from my boot and staking it into the ground beside me. I looked at the dagger with a small amount of annoyance before looking back at the stone, running my eyes over the crudely inscribed engraving on it a double of this mess before actually reading it.

Quiver The Just: Our Fearless Friend.

I shook my head and chuckled, looking down. I looked up and again and spoke softly. ”You know I've always thought your name was ridiculous, and I never hesitated to tell you. You made me chop wood with the heaviest axe possible for a week every damn time I said that. Back then I was just a snot-nosed brat and... now I'm a pretty absurd excuse for a man. You never stopped calling me son though, and you knew I hated that which is why you called me that.” I smiled a bit before continuing. ”I'm still not even sure what the reason was for that.

”You know, I was always flinging your authority in your face because I wanted to make you mad at me, I wanted to throw my hostility somewhere, and at the time I thought you were the bane of my existence. I hated you, and I knew you tried your damndest not to give in and kill me for how damn annoying I was, I have no idea how but you did. I hated you for that too. And you surprised me by training me. It was dark and a blizzard was passing through, and it was f*****g freezing. But you got in my tent, yanked me out with nothing but the clothes on my back, and dragged me to this clearing where the snow was almost to my knees. I remember I was so damn irate I wanted to strangle you and told you as such. And I will never forget what you told me that night. ’Go ahead and try fledgling’.” I laughed out loud for a few minutes, holding my side when it began to hurt. I took a few gasping breaths and righted myself, looking at the grave before continuing.

”I saw red and I just hurled myself at you, leaping over to you with every intent to kill you in whatever way I could. What made me even angrier was how you dodged me, almost as if your stamina was infinite. You dodged every time I went in to attack you, with that same f*****g expression that just pissed me off even further. I never actually landed a blow on you. Then I collapsed, breathing as if I believed I wouldn’t ever again. You just walked over to me and squatted down beside my head and asked me with that ever annoying condescending tone. ’Was that everything?’ I didn't even feel anything, I just wanted to sleep so I nodded, barely, and fell asleep in the snow.

”I woke up, swaddled like a damned baby and with a headache that made me regret my birth. I turned my head and I watched you carve something from a long branch. Before you noticed me and we watched each other for a while, though, it felt more like you were trying to see if I would attempt to assault you again, which was fair. And when I didn't you called Aeson over to check on me before you went back to carving. I had a fever and nearly lost my toes and fingers to frostbite, but I was alive. I don't remember what I felt for you then, I was just existing I suppose. But after I recovered you took me out again, in the right clothing this time and started teaching me. I didn't resist and I didn't fight you, I just stood there quietly and did as told. We did that until my nose and ears burned and you looked about as ruddy as an apple from the cold, the most out of breath I’d ever seen you. Then you patted me on the head and started walking for camp, expecting me to follow, which I did.

”You…I didn't and still don't know what you were to me. But I owed you my life, because…you were the only person that cared, and you saw that I didn’t. In your own special way you brought me back from a path that would have destroyed me sooner rather than later. And as much as I hate to admit it, I will always be grateful for that. Even if my sense of self-preservation is still s**t, you knew me better than either Collins or Darien and even Bri. You know things about me that even I've forgotten about. But I didn't understand you, the man I had pledged my life and blade to. Now you've taken both of our secrets to the grave, as I wish I could do the same for you.”

The delicate, high-pitched call of a songbird floated past my ears, and I leaned back on my hands watching as the bird flew down and gently landed on the headstone, pecking at the underside of its right-wing a little before staring at me, tilting its head back and forth. I sighed and looked up, squinting at the sun which was unobstructed by the wispy clouds that surrounded it. The leaves of the oak trees rustled gently, giving sound to the peaceful hush. I dropped my head back and closed my eyes, allowing the uncertainty from my body to fade with the sound. After a little while I looked back at the headstone and then at my dagger which was still staked into the ground harmlessly. I paused a little longer before taking it up with one hand and untying my ponytail with the other. My red hair fell in front of my face, the fringe I had cut three months prior having grown out in my time in the dungeon. I pushed it back until one unruly strand remained, refusing to do as it was made to. I scoffed and pulled it taut before bringing in my dagger to it and cutting it up to my eye. It continued to live as it wished but I turned my scrutiny to the length I had just cut. A small sense of loss filled me, the significance of the small lock in my hand dawning on me again as it glinted in the sun. I closed my hand around it and extended my hand forward, putting it down on the grave before tying the rest back into its customary ponytail. I stared at the grave a little while longer before smiling.

”Yeah, I know, I'm officially a pixie, you don't need to say it.”