To Love and To Lust

Chapter 6

Amelia

"Amelia!"

I continue walking as if I don't hear my father calling me. I don't care how disrespectful it looks, just like he doesn't care to tell me anything. I understand that I told him I wanted to keep our business and personal lives separate, but the least he could have done was give me a heads-up about bringing Claire in our lives full force.

"Mr. Brown, I just need a minute," he winces as I address him formally.

"Amelia, please don't be difficult," he tells me, only fueling my anger.

"Don't be difficult? Please listen to yourself," I tell him, "After blind-siding me like you did, and twice too, you're telling me not to be difficult? I can't believe you."

"The decision has already been made and there's nothing that can be done. Nothing between us will change," he tells me.

"Don't you see that it already has?" I ask him. His features soften, but he remains resolute about me accepting what already is.

"Please, Amelia. Don't do anything embarrassing. This is for the best," he tells me.

"The best for whom?" I ask, "Never mind, I don't care anyway."

Before he can respond, I leave him standing in the hallway and quickly walk to the ladies' room, where a few of my tears free themselves. I don't know why I'm even crying, but I don't want anyone to see me.

After crying for about five minutes, I go back to my station, ignoring the few stares I get. Thank God I didn't wear any makeup this morning, or it would have been obvious what happened. I'm determined not to let anyone see me crack.

For the rest of the day, I try to carry on. A few times, my father walks by and lingers at my desk, but I just continue typing and ignoring him. I have yet to see his wife, and I'm grateful for that fact.

Thinking back to our conversation, I scoff when I remember him telling me not to do anything embarrassing. He knows how stubborn I can be and that when he tells me to do something I don't like, I always do the opposite.

I almost feel bad for thinking the way I am, but since he wants to treat me like a child, it's only fair that I act like one.

At approximately twelve on the dot, I leave for the café across the street. My best friend is now at her desk. She must have been in the meeting upstairs, but I was blinded by shock and rage to register anyone's face apart from Dad and Claire. She gives me a sympathetic look as I approach her.

She says something to the other receptionist, to which she nods. Presumably, it is about covering for her until she is back from lunch.

"Ready?" She asks and I nod in response.

We walk to the café in silence. When we're at the door, she suddenly turns to me and hugs me, almost causing my emotions to go haywire, which would only result in me crying.

"It'll be okay," she whispers in my ear.

"It's ridiculous that I want to cry over something so simple," I tell her as I steel my emotions and enter the café after her.

"It's not," we place our orders and instead of going back to brown and company, we decide to eat there. She notices that I only order for myself, but decides to say nothing.

"It is, too. I should accept Claire with open arms. I know that my father has been lonely ever since Mom left, and for the longest time, I wished that he would find someone to keep him company. Now that he has, I'm throwing a tantrum about it," I tell her.

"You have every right to feel the way you do. I would, if one of my parents decided to get married and not tell me," Lily assures me.

"I know," I agree.

"So what are you planning on doing about it?" Lily asks.

"I don't know yet, but for now, I think I should just drown my sorrows," I speak, enjoying the look of surprise on her face.

Normally, she would have been the one that insisted that we go out, and I would have given her a million reasons why we shouldn't before I concede. But, less the headache, last night was absolute fun.

"Oh my God! Who are you and what have you done to my best friend?" Lily feigns worry and shock.

"Your best friend wants to have fun. Will you help her?"

"You don't even have to ask twice," she immediately answers with a broad grin.

When we leave the café, I go straight back to work. The sooner I'm done, the sooner I can leave. That is if my father doesn't need me for anything else.

I'm typing on my desktop when a shadow suddenly blocks my light, and I can feel a presence looming over me. As I look up, I see my father standing in front of my desk, arms akimbo.

"Mr. Brown," I greet him, "Is there something I can do for you?"

"Where is my lunch?" He asks.

"I don't know," I answer.

"Amelia, stop playing with me," he says, "Where's my lunch?"

"I'm not playing. I don't know where your lunch is, Sir," I feign confusion.

"I saw you leaving for lunch at the café," he says.

"I ate my lunch at the café."

"You didn't bring anything for me?" He asks in disbelief, making my guilt rear its head.

"I thought you would have eaten your lunch with Claire."

He sighs.

"Amelia, I told you that nothing changes. I still want us to continue our lunch tradition," he tells me, "Please."

"Tomorrow." 'After I feel like I've overcome this urge to constantly be upset with you' I want to add, but keep it to myself instead.

"I can accept that," he nods, "And we need to talk."

"Tomorrow," I repeat. Tonight will be my night of caring about only myself, then I'll go back to being the dutiful daughter he thinks me to be.

With another nod, he walks away.

After work, I decide to get ready at Lily's. She has her own place and if I wasn't a daddy's-girl, I would have had my own place too. Anyway, Lily will have everything I need for our night out.

"Anywhere specific in mind?" She asks as we walk toward her apartment door. She lives in a complex.

"Not really," I lie. There's only one place on my mind, and it's because I want to possibly, accidentally run into 'someone'. Lily sees through my lie immediately. She's not my best friend for nothing.

"I was thinking of going back to MH. I had fun there," she says, saving me from my own lie.

"I'm fine with that," I say nonchalantly.

"It's settled then. MH Bar and Grill it is."

Lily does my hair and makeup. My dark hair is let down, and my red lipstick is bold. The short red dress accentuates my curves, and with the sky-high red heels I have on, if I were a man, I would be attracted to me.

"Damn!" Lily says as I do a twirl, showing off my outfit. I almost couldn't find something to fit my a*s in, but this dress stretches and is one size over, making me lucky.

"Look at who's talking," I tell her as she spins for me the same way I did for her. She's dressed in black leather pants and a crop top with leather stilettos. She could have easily been a model.

"When Martin sees you, his c*ck will instantly stand up," she says, then laughs, and I join in with her.

"I hope it does," I reply, biting my lip. I might be a virgin, but by no means am I shy.

"What if it does?" She asks.

"If, and that's a big if, I see him, and he appears to be interested in me, I'm going to give him my virginity," I tell her.

"Good for you, babe. Did you shave?"

"Every part of my body," I reply.

"Good, now let's go."

We grab our purses and leave for the bar in the car I ordered.

The car stops at MH and as soon as I step out, I see Martin. He glances at me before doing a double take and allowing his eyes to roam over me, pleased with what he sees.

That's what I thought until his jaw becomes tightly clenched before he walks away and goes inside, leaving me confused yet determined to get him in my bed.