To Love and To Lust

Chapter 7

Amelia

The first and last time Martin rejected me, I convinced myself that I wouldn’t let his dismissal of our lust influence my decisions, but here I am, sitting with Lily, who is having the time of her life, sulking.

Every time I force myself away from the thought of him, they come right back, and it’s like the more I disassociate them, the more they manifest.

I’ve always had a crush on him, so much, that a part of me thinks it might be more than that; a crush, though the other part thinks I’m just being rebellious.

Ugh! Confusion, confusion.

The subject of my thoughts is currently sitting at a table in the back, flocked by women. Of course, he’d be. He’s handsome, sexy, rich, and even from here, I can see the dollar signs in the women’s eyes.

They are the reasons men are afraid to trust women, even when they think they can potentially be a lifetime partner. They don’t know how to separate the genuine ones from the gold diggers.

I can’t say that I’ve ever seen him with a woman before. He attends every charity function, and almost everyone takes a date, but he always shows up alone.

I’m so lost in thought that I don’t realize that I’ve been staring in Martin’s direction the entire time, until Lily nudges me and I snap out of my reverie.

My cheeks burn as my eyes connects with his. My first thought is to avert my gaze, but if I really want him to be my first, I have to at least have the courage to ask him. How can I ask him if I can’t even look at the man?

Holding his gaze seems to be the best way to go, so I do it. I can feel the heat spreading through the rest of my body as Martin looks at me and licks his lips.

Is that a promise that he’s the big bad wolf and he wants to eat me up? Because, if that’s the case, I would gladly let him.

I’d tuck his napkin in, provide him with a knife and fork and spread my self on the table like a three course meal. Better yet, a five course meal, because then, he’d take longer to finish eating.

Oh god! Why did I have to go there? I’m so f*cking horny right now and the heat of his stare does nothing to cool me down.

Frustration runs through my veins more than my own blood, resulting in me squirming in my sea, somewhat trying to give myself gratification.

Martin looking down tells me he knows what I’m thinking, and it’s only then that I turn away. I grab a shot from the table and tip it backwards, relishing in the burn down my throat.

“Who needs more shots?” I ask Lily and the two guys sitting at our table.

One of them is supposed to be here for me, but I’m not in the least interested in him. I have my sights set elsewhere.

“Do you want me to accompany you?” My supposed date asks. That’s how I have to think of him, because I don’t even know his name, and I’m not interested in learning it.

“I’m fine,” I tell him.

“Are you sure?” Lily asks, sensing that something is wrong.

“I’m sure. I just need to use the ladies’ room then I’ll get the drinks. No worries, babe,” I reassure her.

“Let me know if you need help,” she tells me. I nod then walk away.

It’s funny how as soon as you think about peeing, your bladder is automatically full, because just a while ago, I didn’t want to use the ladies’ room. I only used that as an excuse to get away for a bit because I didn’t want Lily worrying. Now, it’s coming down.

Damn it!

Approaching the corridor that houses the ladies’ room, I notice that there’s a line. A reasonably long one, as the bar is at a high capacity tonight. I never thought this place would be so packed, even in the middle of the week, but it is.

If I stay here any longer, I’m going to pee on myself, so I turn back, deciding to find somewhere outside to relive myself and as soon a I do, I see a sign that says ‘Restroom: Staff Only’.

Thinking it’s locked, I jiggle the doorknob playfully, surprised when it opens. Turning toward the other ladies, I realize they are too preoccupied with using the restroom, so I enter and rush through one of two doors, finding a cubicle immediately.

If a staff member sees me, I’ll just use the excuse that I’m drunk, despite only being buzzed. If they rant, I’ll make them feel guilty for arguing with a customer.

Relief is what I feel when I finally start peeing. It feels so good that tears come to my eyes and I have to blink them back in order not to mess up my makeup.

Someone enters, causing me to freeze while I’m pulling up my flimsy lace thong. I hold my breath until I hear them peeing.

Quickly, I exit the cubicle and rush to the counter to wash my hands when my eyes meet another pair through the mirror. One blue, one brown.

The water continues to run as I go rigid. This is a blessing as well as a curse. I have him alone and I can tell him that I want him to be my first, but if he’s upset that I’m in here, this could go badly.

He’s still not moving, so I get ready to turn around, open my mouth and take the initiative, but one glance down causes a gasp to escape my lips and my eyes to widen.

What the hell is that thing he’s holding in his hand?

‘It’s his p***s, dummy!’ My thoughts scream at me, but I disagree.

‘That thing’ is not a p***s, but a c*ck! p***s doesn’t seem much worthy of a word to call a manhood of that size.

Oh my God! If I give him my virginity, he might have me bedridden for days, weeks even.

When I look up again, the smirk on his face causes me to know I’ve been staring at his c*ck for too long now. I clear my throat and finally look away.

“Amelia, Amelia,” he says my name as he approaches me. I don’t miss the hint of danger it holds but I don’t cower away. He tucks his c*ck back into his pants, but makes no move to zip it or fix his unbuckled belt.

“Mr. Hill,” I say after finding my voice.

“Martin,” he corrects me, “ I’ve been trying my best to stay away from you so I don’t betray my best friend, but you always seem to show up, resulting in me contradicting my own decisions. If it’s trouble that you want, then it’s trouble you shall receive.”

I have no idea what he means by that, but before I have a chance to think, he capture my lips in a punishing kiss.

Tonight might be the night, after all!