To Love and To Lust

Chapter 12

Amelia

“Amelia, you know I can’t do that,” he says, shaking his head as if to convince himself to believe his own words, embarrassing me once again.

I make a move to open the car door because I need to get out of here as fast as possible, but I’m held back by Martin.

“Let go off me,” I try to flash off his hand but he doesn’t budge. He holds firm.

“Amelia, please.” I have no idea for what he’s pleading, but the softness of his eyes and gentleness of his tone has me relaxing back into my seat and letting out a defeated sigh. I’m fed up.

“Martin, I’m tired of this. You don’t want me, so let me go,” I tell him what’s on my mind. I thought he offered to take me home because he wanted something to happen between us.

“It’s not that I don’t want you because, believe me, I do, more than I’ve wanted anyone in a long time,” he says, stressing the word ‘long’ m, and in the process, boosting my confidence.

“Then why won’t you come inside?” I ask, puzzled .

“Because that’s your father’s house. What we‘ve done is already risky. If I go into the house with you, it will be downright disrespectful,” he says.

“Why, except that you’re friends?”

“Amelia, the things I want to do to you shouldn’t be done under your father’s roof, and if we go inside, there will be no stopping me, because one I start exploring your body, I’m positive I’ll lose my senses,” he explains. His words might as well be a switch to turn me on because every time he speaks, that’s what happens.

Is he saying that if we go inside he won’t be able to resist f*cking me? Because, if that’s the case I’m down, but at the same time, I understand where he’s coming from. I should feel the same way, but I’m not sorry to say that I don’t.

In the end, I sigh and say, “I completely understand.”

“Let me walk you to the door. I’m no gentleman, but I think you deserve to be treated like a queen,” he tells me, making my chest swell with emotions.

Nodding my approval, he exits the car and rounds it, then opens my door to help me out, contradicting his recent words.

When we reach at the front door, I insert my key but make no move to open it. I’m completely unsure of what to do or say next.

“I would love to taste your lips but I can’t,” he tells me, breaking my thoughts.

“Why not?”

“Because your father will see it on the camera,” he explains, nudging his face upward and gesturing me to look.

“Oh,” I reply simply, feeling foolish. How could I have forgotten about the cameras?

That’s what being around Martin does to me. I’ve known that he’s my fathers best friend for a long time, but he had barely shown himself, so I hadn’t got the chance to be around him to feel something for him before.

But being around him opens my eyes, heart and v*gina to new things, new feelings, that I desperately want to explore. I have to, or I’ll go insane.

“Goodnight, Amelia,” he says.

“Goodnight, Martin,” I say, reluctant to let us part in this way.

“I’ll see you around,” he says as he backs away slowly.

His words give me hope that what we have or what has happened between us isn’t over, making me excited and nervous all in one.

“See you around,” I reply right before he enters his car and give me one last look over, before he closes the door and drives away.

Entering the house, I lean back against the door and feel as the smile on my face stretches from ear to ear. I couldn’t stop it, even if I wanted to. I’m very pleased.

I touch my lips, remembering how Martin’s felt against them. He’s kissed me more than once, gently, and not so gently, and honestly, I think I prefer the latter.

I’m a virgin who knows nothing about s*x and I hope Martin is interested in helping me explore things to figure out what I like.

Martin and s*x in the same line of thought only causes me to get aroused, so I go upstairs, lock my door and immediately strip out of my clothes off. The need to mastub*te takes over. And listen, I’ve mastubat*ed before Martin showed his interest in me, but since he did, the need to do so has tripled.

I sit on the edge of the bed and lubricate my finger with my saliva, then I slowly insert it, closing my eyes and imagining that it’s Martin doing it.

I try to imitate the motion he used in the bathroom because he made me wet f*cking me with his fingers like that.

My finger comes in contact with my g spot I thrust in and out. I drew of some of the wetness with another finger and use another it to stimulate my cl*t. I shudder and let out a moan. I picture Martin’s handsome face and talented tongue the entire time.

Very quickly, my breathing picks up just as I feel my org*sm fast approaching. It only does when it comes to him. My eyes flutter close as I don’t have the energy to keep them open. A buzzing sound in my head gets louder by the second.

I’m on a high, though nothing like the one Martin had put me on. Incoherent words flow from my mouth and I say his name multiple times as I come, trembling and shaking, my eyes rolling over as if I’m experiencing a fit.

As soon as the high dies down, I fall back on the bed, boneless and my breathing labored.

“F*ck!” I curse loudly.

For sure, if we had entered the house, I would have jumped his bones and he would have taken my virginity.

But as I slowly come to my senses, I realize I want to be comfortable when hes f*cking me. I don’t want to look over my shoulders, thinking about getting caught.

Mustering what little energy regenerates, I crawl up the bed and cover myself with the sheet up to my neck, my strewn clothes and nakedness forgotten.

As I fall asleep, my door cracks open and a head peeks in. I barely register the look of puzzlement on my father’s face as he takes in the state of my room. If he asks tomorrow, I’ll just tell him that I really wanted to sleep.

Thank God Martin was thinking, because I wasn’t. We’d have definitely got caught. I’d like to think that Martin would have taken his time with me while we were lost in the throes of ecstasy.

As I drift deeper and deeper, I realize how right he was about keeping away, but I like him and I’m not going to stop until he is mine. Even if just partially. That’s the last thought I have before I fall completely in a state of unconsciousness.