BLESSED BONDS

CHAPTER 08

LUCA

Being in my late twenties, I thought I was way past over heartbreaks. Over the years, I had conditioned myself from letting hurt get the best of me. Even when I chose psychology as my major, it was to only further understand how my head works and how to cope with it. It benefited me and the people around me who were just as broken.

Morana was one of them. With the handful of interactions we used to have back then, she was made the focus of my attention and my studies.

She was different every time we were able to meet. Looking much worse than our previous meeting and so on. It was as if she was spiraling down — internally.

Physically, she was the picture perfect lady they trained her to be, but I could see how her eyes became duller each time, the fire in them dimming.

It gradually came to the point where she completely stopped conversing with any of us, aside from the polite short responses that were mandatory for her and the small head nods and head shakes to express her answers.

Her mother labeled it as her ‘rebellious phase’ and not to worry much about it.

I was concerned, just like the rest were.

However, there wasn’t anything we could do for our fated who was still underage and still under full custody of her parents.

Once, she had asked me to do her a favor. Asking me to meet her outside of her family’s watchful eyes. Wanting to be of help to her, I didn’t give it much thought and agreed, promising to come see her that night. I didn’t tell my parents about it so they had no clue of my plans with her, and made their own plans where I was needed to attend with them. It was an important Gala that would cement my place in my family’s world.

It was unfortunate, but I didn’t meet with Morana that cold evening. I promised her the next day. But she never replied back.

Abruptly, the visitations were cut in number, the longest we weren't permitted to meet with her was almost half a year. And that was only to come and congratulate Hael for graduating.

To my utter horror during that, she was in a walker — something about her breaking a kneecap a few months prior, was what her and all our parents claimed.

It was so troublesome, that I even, by secret, asked Morana if she needed any help. She declined, saying there was nothing wrong.

I knew she was lying.

And I knew in the pits of my gut, that it had to do with something that happened that night.

I was sure of it — especially when she was glaring at me full animosity in the present now.

Whatever happened then was something she still holds me accountable for.

“I’m sorry.”

It hurts to apologize. Particularly when I have no full knowledge of what I did wrong. Yet somehow, the pain that flashed over her face, even by just a split second, was enough to make me crumble, “I’m sorry, Mora.” My voice threatened to croak.

My words only became a trigger, shooting up to her feet, she angrily strides towards us, and next thing I was now closely grazing down at her.

“No, you don’t get to say sorry.” She spits, standing with her fists clenching next to her sides.

I fight back through a turmoil of emotions, “Still—”

She cuts me off, “None of you do. You don’t owe me an apology, Luca. Like how I don’t owe any of you one, neither.” Firm on her choice, she whirls back around as quickly as she was to face me.

I watch her backside, shoulders going up and down at her every heave of breath.

One of my hands tries to reach for her without a thought, but someone firmly holds me back from doing so. Stopping me from completely destroying myself. And her.

I turn to see Hael shaking his head.

Don’t.

The word was clearly sent telepathically.

Biting my lip, he was right.

As much as I want to patch things up, we needed time. She needed time.

Thankfully, Hael saves us all from the impending silent hell.

“There’s brunch in the kitchen. I’ll heat it up for you.” He went to pass by her, giving her a quick glance on the way, “You need to eat.”

She nods almost a minute later, feet taking reluctant steps as she follows him to the dining table. I wasn’t surprised when she didn't bother to look back at me. Out of sight, I go back to the sofa and sink there. Face buried deep in my hands as I let out the breath that got stuck in my lungs.

“f*****g hell.” The profanity leaves my lips.

No amount of mental fortifying was enough to prepare me for all of that. Like, seriously. Ripping me to shreds right off the bat? Cruel. Just utterly merciless.

As if reading my mind, Calix plops himself next to me. I turn my head slightly to grace him how pathetic I look and see him doing ripping motions with his hands.

“Like f*****g paper.” Was his comment in regards to the conversation we had in my room, and a bitter smile curled my lips.

“Lucky bastard,” Calix admits, raking his fingers through his hair in distress, “You get to go first.”

I don’t know if I call it luck.

Nevertheless.

I’m sure she’s definitely not done with us yet.

I sincerely hope the others survive as well.

○○○

HAEL

Brunch was eggs, bacon and waffles with a side of yogurt and fruit.

I refill the empty glass with more milk. Silently, I watch her pick her fourth slice of bacon. Her long sleeves were pulled up her arms and I came to study the tattoos covering her exposed skin — butterflies on her right, moths on her left.

They ridiculed all over her limbs varying in sizes. I curiously tilt my head, fascinated at how she was able to drape her entire body with art in four years.

Curiosity got the best of me.

“Tell me,” she slightly jumps at my voice, mouth currently occupied with half a waffle, “Did you do those yourself?” Also I needed an ice breaker to this damn tension.

Doing a series of blinks, at first she was confused, so I bob my head to gesture at her arms. “Your tattoos.”

Narrowing her eyes, I could tell she was suspicious with the sudden question. It takes her a moment to make a decision that it was just a harmless topic.

“Most of them.” She admits, “My friend does the big ones that I can’t reach.”

Big ones?

So, she really has more.

“This friend of yours,” I glanced over at Calix who was at the opposite side of the table, on a chair farthest away. “Did they do your piercings as well?” The inquiry was too personal and invading and I shot him a silent warning. Kylo, who was next to him, kicks him under the table, “Dude.”

To my horror, she casually answers, “Yeah, he did.” She emphasizes the gender of her body artist, already guessing where Calix was going with the conversation.

“And yes,” her brow arched in a bored way, “including the ones under my clothes.”

At the mention of it, my eyes unintentionally fall from her face and land on her chest.

“You might as well have taken a picture earlier as a keepsake, if you guys are just going to keep staring hard at my chest.” Was what she flatly babbled, and I guess I wasn’t the only one caught taking glances.

I cleared my throat awkwardly, even handing her a napkin to brush off being apprehended.

“My god,” she had the look of disbelief on her face, “Stop staring already.”

Redirecting my focus on whoever she was accusing, I found out it was just Calix. Again.

He wasn’t in a mocking mood though, lips pressed into a thin line, brows knitted so close they were starting to join in the middle of his forehead.

Calix just now feels our eyes on him, probably having zoned out as if he was in deep thought for a few seconds. Embarrassed, he tries to hide it by twisting his face into a scowl.

“Don’t flatter yourself.”

More so, I roll my eyes at him.

Kylo then nonchalantly reveals something, “He’s only staring because you’re wearing one of the jerseys with his number on.”

The bold 13.

He was right. That is Calix’s number.

“I didn’t know this was his. Why was it even in the closet there anyways?” Frowning, it was clear she had no idea what was going through Calix’s head.

It wasn’t just about the damn jersey, you cold-hearted girl.

Probably in his own sense of revenge for the kick he got earlier, Kylo gladly terrorizes, “He has a ton of those, guess that one you’re wearing is just a bit extra special.” He dodges in time, hopping from one chair to another as Calix makes a grab for him.

“Shut the f**k up.” He growls, “Some stupid staff must’ve just misplaced my s**t. Big deal.” He reasoned, as if he could fool any of us.

Not even her. She joins to poke fun at him.

“Guess the booty shorts are yours too? I bet you’d look awfully cute and perky in them.”

Kylo chokes on his laugh, slapping a hand to his mouth, not wanting to seem like he was conniving with the enemy.

Even I couldn’t help but feel the urge to curl my lips, proceeding to hide it behind my palm.

For a moment, I wondered if ever our original plan to live together had hitched off as planned four years ago, would tiny moments like this be normal in that alternate?

I couldn’t help but wonder.

Wincing, I bit the inside of my cheek to stop such pathetic thoughts.

“Eat.” I say to her, “We have more if you’re still hungry.” I distracted, redirecting her attention away from the other two here who were now exchanging insults and occasional death threats.

I took the liberty to make sure she was going to be fed and hydrated.

Luca asked to be excused earlier, going out for fresh air. He probably took the time to pick up the pieces of him that she had easily shattered.

Goddamn.

She really has a knack for shooting at sore spots — but with Luca?

She went straight for his jugular.

I felt bad for him.

Out of everyone, he was the most hopeful one of us. The optimist. Witnessing him being shot point black by her was f*****g brutal.

Being at her mercy, I was already mentally preparing myself for when she’ll pull the trigger on me.

It’s going to hurt.

But I know I'll survive it — I have to.

“I’m full.” She says, finishing her fruit last, “I can’t eat anymore.”

“Not even for cake?”

Startling, including me, Luca emerges into the dining area holding out a pastry box, “It’s chocolate and cream.” He uses a cautious tone with her, approaching like he was in a predator’s territory.

I should’ve found it hilarious. But who was I to laugh at him when I too, was tiptoeing like there were landmines around her.

Reaching the table, he proceeds to carefully open the box, revealing a very superfluous, intricately decorated slice of cake.

Guess ‘going out for fresh air’ meant ‘going out to find an offering’ in Lucian’s dictionary.

Watching how her eyes widened in amazement at the sight of his present, I instantly knew she was willing to forget the bad blood for a moment to get a piece of that cake.

Women.

I stop myself from humorously implying it out loud.

She catches herself and immediately her eyes turn to slits.

“You can’t fix things with cake, Lucian Ambrose.” The sudden full name dropping made the owner stutter.

“N—never said it would.” He gulps, glancing tentatively at her, “Just a harmless peace offering. Not a negotiation for a cease-fire.” Explaining his sorry case, he lightly tries to probe at her sweet tooth that all of us were very aware that she has, “It’s from the bakery down in the building. I got the last piece of their very popular cake. I heard it rates a solid ten out of ten on social media these days.”

If his idea of buttering her up right after being just murdered by her was tempting her with an overpriced slice of diabetes — then he was a f*****g mad genius.

I kind of wish she threw the damn thing to his pitiful face.

“Ten out of ten, huh?” She was skeptical, as if she wasn’t already drooling over it, “This isn’t your idea of raising a white flag?”

Luca shakes his head with a dry chuckle, “No. You can still out right chew me out and destroy the others like you want.”

The rest of us gave him a foul look. Way to go sacrificing your own fellow soldiers, General Asshole.

Content enough with his words, I jerk away as she instantly stabs her fork into the cake.

Quite mortified, we all watch her savor every bite of it.

The moaning in pure glee was unnecessary, and I shifted in my chair, abashed. I blame the man who sat next to me, the miniscule victory clearly celebrated in his head.

“That was quick.” I say to Luca through clenched teeth, “I expected you’d be out of commission for a while longer.” Whispering at him not so casually.

“I didn’t want to miss the rest of the party.” He simply says, a look of amusement on his face.

Opposite from us, Kylo loudly lets out a snort.

“You bought only one just for her? Despicable.”

We groaned at his indication of betrayal.

“You don’t even eat too much sugar, man.” Luca raises a brow at Kylo who crosses his arms with a deep frown, “Still, would’ve been nice to feel included.” He mumbles under his breath to which Luca shakes his head at the ridiculous display of sudden childish envy.

“You want a bite?” Surprisingly, Morana offers rather kindly, her fork out with only an unhealthy amount of frosting towards Kylo’s way, “Don’t be shy now. You already saw me naked, remember?” Cutting the act short, her tone filled with contempt.

It made Kylo drop his head to the table with the slam of his forehead.

“Please, spare me already.” He grumbles low to whoever he was praying to. Definetely not to her.

“Such dramatics.” Shaking her head before tilting it towards Luca, “By the way, it tastes like heaven in a cake. Thank you.”

“My pleasure.” He happily responds.

I eye the two sourly. They’ve been together under one roof for like what? A day? And are acting like a married couple who fought ‘till they turned the house upside down and proceeded to tolerate each other afterwards and enjoy desserts. My god, help me.

Well, I expected that from Luca. Being the soft sap that he is. Her on the other hand? What happened to all that bite?

“So. It’s been a pleasure seeing you all again but I’m this close to setting your whole pompous home on fire and watching from afar how it turns into ashes and toxic fumes if you’re planning to keep me locked up here any longer.”

Ah.

There it is.

It was my cue to enter. Clearing my throat, I straightened my posture before turning to her, “Locking you up here was never the plan.” Seeing the raised brow she gave me, I add, “Not long term. We just set precaution for now after your whole skit at the bridge.”

“I see.” She nods.

“Withholding your freedom was never one of our objectives, Sinclair. You may convince yourself that we’re bad people, maybe even monsters, but we’re far from that.”

I notice how her fingers slowly start to fidget, tapping on the wood, “Then what do you want, Blackwell? Closure?”

I simply bob my head.

“Four years. That’s how long you allowed us to lament in confusion and anger after you so brazenly ran away from us.” I couldn’t hold the hurt that was heard in my words.

“I wasn’t running away from you.” She claims, “I left.”

“And you did.” I agreed, “You left everything. Just the clothes you had on you that day, no money, nowhere to go, no name. You willingly went to the outside world like a lost child.”

“And?” Daring, she glares, “You’re angry because I left you all? Well boo-f*****g-hoo, your suburban wife-to-be ran out on you before even planning the wedding. Get over it.”

Shaking my head, I mirror the look on her face, “We weren’t focused on being angry at all. We were dead serious worried about you and your well-being. We always had. You were alone out there. You lived a pampered life whether you like to admit it or not. For all we knew, you could’ve turned up dead sooner or later.”

Cutting me off, she proclaims, “But I survived.”

“Damn right you did. And you took back the power your family and ours stole from you. And I take f*****g pride at how strong and a pain in the ass you turned out to be now.” Regardless of how hard the tone I was using, it was a compliment.

She did not receive it well though, “I don’t need your damn flattery.”

“That’s not what this is about.” Calix joins, hissing, “You left to be a strong independent big girl, good for you, but we spent years f*****g worried about you, searching endlessly to the point of insanity—” although uncalled for, he motions to Kylo as an example, “—when you could’ve just talked it over with us. We may be total assholes but we would’ve listened to you.”

Aside from all the profanities, he delivered what I was about to say. I think?

It wouldn’t be a surprise if she lashes out, since it was Calix, but she merely bites her lip, “You could’ve just let me go and move on.” Her mumbling went on.

I had the perfect answer to that, yet I wasn’t able to give it when even Kylo jumps in now. Did I not make it clear earlier that I would do the talking here?

“You say that like it’s a f*****g walk in the park. How the hell were we supposed to move on when you basically ghosted us? Rejecting us to our faces would’ve hurt a lot less, you know.”

A scoff leaves her, body whirling to face Kylo next, “Are you seriously mad because I hurt your feelings?”

Kylo gapes, offended albeit flushing a bit, “Who said anything about feelings?”

“Don’t you f*****g scream at me!”

“I’m not f*****g screaming at all!” Well, he was now.

It was rare to see Kylo snap. Usually, he’d just avoid things and do his own business. However, when it comes to his fated, Morana, he was quick to react immaturely.

I turn my head towards Luca in disbelief. How the hell did the serious conversation I planned turned into this childish banter? He simply shrugs, still zipping his mouth.

Before either Kylo or Calix dig this grave deeper, I reach under and kick whoever’s shin I can catch.

“You’re so unreaso—ow!” Kylo yelps. Bullseye. I narrow my eyes at him, signaling him to shut up. He heeded my warning and bent a bit over to rub the sore spot where the tip of my shoe met his bone.

“Going back to the point of all this.” I take back the mic that was so rudely snatched away from me, “We—no, some of us weren’t too hung up on getting our ‘feelings hurt’. What Calix said is right though.” Acknowledging, I almost took it back when she caught the smug look on his face, yet I continued, “We could’ve talked all of it over. I’m more mad that you didn’t put a little bit of trust in us. You didn’t have to leave by yourself. We could’ve taken you away from all of it.”

She was quick to retort, “You speak of trust as if I had any for you guys in the first place.” Glaring hard at everything, I wouldn’t be surprised if something in here will just spontaneously combust into flames, her words sharp and cut deep.

“You didn’t give us a chance to gain your trust.” I told her, before quickly correcting, “Well, you couldn’t give us a chance, with how your mother and our families meddled in our supposed relationship. It wasn’t your fault. It was none of our fault.”

“Oh, there was a relationship to begin with?”

“Yes.” I firmly claim, locking my gaze on hers, daring her to break away. She doesn’t and I see how she takes a sharp inhale as hers shifted to golden amber, twinkling like burning stars. A shiver of exhilaration waved in me and I didn’t need the visual confirmation to know that my own irises mirrored the same warm sparkle.

“Whether that relationship felt forced to you or was measly short lived. We are all fated to walk the same path. Either we’re holding hands or ripping each other's faces. I don’t care. We—” I gesture to the guys, “—are all you have. And you…..” my voice trails, biting the inside of my cheek to keep all the crash of emotions in check, “f**k, you’re all we have.”

Okay, so the plan was not to spill feelings and confessions like goddamn streamers on a birthday. I feel my face slowly flush and I refuse to look at anyone other than her, right now.

What was the point of even prolonging the fighting? We haven’t seen each other for four years. Too long. Too f*****g long. I wanted to still be angry with her, but I knew that would only push her away from us further.

She could hate me for all I care. Still doesn’t change the fact that we’re fated to be together.

I won’t chain her to stay with us here. Instead, I’ll f*****g chain myself to her if it comes to that point where she wanted to leave again.

“No more running, Morana.” I practically nearly begged, “We’ll protect you from your mother, from our parents, even the whole blessed community. From everything that made you want to leave in the first place. Just give us a chance.” It was a promise. One where I was desperate she would consider.

Morana Sinclair always had a free spirit, despite being hogtied by her mother’s demands and society’s rules. I knew the moment I first met her that she wanted nothing more than to live a different life, rather than be coddled like a trapped princess in a tower and live a boring regal life.

She was profusely obstinate, had a magnificent power, was blessed with guardians and was chosen by Fate herself — she was bound for greatness.

And that was something she wanted for herself.

Always will. Even if it meant she had to willingly walk alone.

She didn’t have to yet she didn’t know that — she has us.

“No, I can’t.” She shuts her eyes, blinking, forcing our connection to break and I was left to stare at dark dimmed eyes, “I can’t stay.”

I resist the urge to grimace as I feel my chest tighten.

Who was I kidding? Guess she will always be too selfish.

From the corner of my sight, I see Kylo lean forward.

“Then don’t stay.” He nonchalantly tells her. “Like we said, no one’s holding you down.” I cross my brows, thinking I should’ve shoved enough protein powder to shut his ass up ages ago.

Confusion sprouts in her face, before blooming to vexation.

“Then what the hell is the purpose of all of this?” Showing off her despair by slamming her palms to the table, “Was it all just to get back at me? Did you just want me to beg for your mercy? To get in my head and mess with it? Or is this just a ploy so you can get me to complete the bonds? Are you that desperate to start shooting glitter out of your ass, huh?! Because I hope, if you ever gain your abilities, it turns out to be magical diarrhea!”

I cringe at the ridiculous threat.

We wait for Kylo’s response since the i***t’s the one who got himself into triggering her tirade.

He merely shrugs at her rambling, making her huff angrily that I could imagine the puff of smoke coming out of her ears.

“f*****g unbelievable!” She barks, standing up to leave, “I’m out of here!” Announcing without sparing us another second of her time anymore.

Alarmed, the three of us shared a look, and before any of us could do damage control, Kylo also stood. With his hands in his pockets and a flat look on his face, he traces the steps she took out of the dining area.

He was so hot on her tail. Practically little space between them that he agitated her furthermore, “What the hell are you doing?!”

We follow their trail. She led them both to where the elevator was. We make it in time to see her shove him away from her personal space.

“I’m leaving like I want to, Kylo. Open the goddamn elevator.” She demands him. To even make things worse for us, he takes out his card placed behind his phone, and swipes it to the sensors.

“Whatever. You sure we won’t be bringing anything?”

Baffled at his question, her face breaks into something I’ve never seen her do before, “Excuse me—We???” Her nose scrunches. Again, Kylo shrugs.

“If you’re not staying, I’m not staying either.”

Has this kid gone mad?

Honestly, I was at loss for words, like the rest of us were.

She scoffs at him, “Very original. If I shoot myself in the foot, would you do it too?”

He rolls his eyes at her dramatics, “Of course not. I’m not dumb enough to inflict self pain.”

“Then what the hell are you doing?!” For a tiny girl, she sure shrieks in high volumes.

On the other hand, Kylo had looked like a man who made up his mind, “If you’re leaving, I’m coming with you.”

“What?” All of us stare at him in bewilderment. More her and me next.

“Are you serious right now, Kylo?” Gawking at him, I’m pretty sure Morana Sinclair was borderline horrified at him right now.

Knowing Kylo, he was just as bad as her.

“Dead f*****g serious, Sin.” He declares and my hands fly to my head, massaging the sharp aching of my brain.

Jesus f*****g Christ.

Was none of my plan going to end up like I intended it would?

It was going to be a piece of work trying to convince her to stay with us but threatening to follow her like a damn devotee was a whole different level of crazy.

I hopelessly turned to seek help from the one who handles crazy well — Luca, had slanted his eyes at the whole exchange, scrutinizing.

I had hoped for him to de-escalate the situation. Instead, he joins the madness.

“I could always postpone med school for the meantime.”

“You’re coming too? Now that’s original.” Kylo snorts, rolling his eyes once more. Just for the fun of it and the sight of her jaw dropping, Calix joins forces with them too.

“What the hell, the Capital smells like s**t anyways.”

A loud “No! Please tell me you’re all joking? You can’t honestly follow me!”, came out from her, darting her eyes from one crazy to the next.

Her eyes landed on me, a pleading expression stuck on her face. “Aren’t you going to say anything about this?” As a last resort, she was basically asking for my help.

I shifted my eyes to the guys, getting their plan, before they landed back on my mortified, fated one.

Well, if you can’t beat her, might as well join her.

“Meh. I could always make a new building from scratch.”

Victory tastes sweeter when it was won in vile ways, I guess.